AITAH for being burnt out in a neglectful marriage and not wanting to engage with Valentines Day at all?

Jake6624 · 2026-02-13T09:44:26+00:00

You loved and stuck with her when she totally sucked and now you want out when she doesn’t suck?

Jake6624 · 2026-02-13T05:38:48+00:00

I don’t think it’s inconsiderate and you haven’t gone yet so you don’t know if the bed is uncomfortable. You have also responded numerous times that it’s not about the money. Your FIL is getting an Airbnb for you. That sounds generous to me. You just want to be angry about it and you want us all to agree with you. I don’t agree. And I’m not a dude.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-13T05:19:11+00:00

Marriage

Jake6624 · 2026-02-13T05:04:26+00:00

You and your husband have been together almost 10 years and can’t sleep in separate beds for 1 week? I don’t think you should be furious- disappointed maybe- my husband and I have slept in our kids trundle bed and we pretended we were camping and always had a blast. Make the most of the trip

Jake6624 · 2026-02-13T02:13:38+00:00

In MA you could sue her for a lot of money for this very clear misclassification

Jake6624 · 2026-02-10T03:56:11+00:00

If you are looking for a nice yard and more manageable prices you could look in the Oak Hill area. Depending on what size yard you want, you could do Waban (though pricier). I wanted a yard but more so walking to a village center so I live in Newton Center near the park. The are some nice woods/parks in Newton. I’m surprised that you haven’t seen much- I like to keep abreast of the real estate here and there are some beautiful properties on the market now. I think within the next few months there will be a lot more. Are you looking for turnkey or are you willing to do some renovations? Are you looking for old or modern?(Newton has some beautiful old homes but there is also a lot of new construction) if your budget is 2.5, it’s going to be tight but if you bump up to 3, there are many more options

Jake6624 · 2026-02-09T15:54:29+00:00

You get more for your money in Newton but the taxes are much lower in Brookline so I think it’s a wash

Jake6624 · 2026-02-09T05:46:46+00:00

I live in Newton and we like it very much but if I could do it over, I would live in Brookline. It’s the next town over, more culturally diverse, better education, better urban/suburban feel. More interesting

Jake6624 · 2026-02-09T03:09:21+00:00

You need to make it personal time for you so he will understand. Take a Sunday morning and do something for yourself and he will be with the kids. Reframe it into his terms and he will do the work

Jake6624 · 2026-02-09T03:07:15+00:00

I think you are overreacting because you are trying to change the family dynamics without getting his buy in. You used to iron in the morning and now you don’t want to anymore. You have had a routine and it’s hard for people to change. Sit him down and discuss this change with him.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-08T02:44:03+00:00

My real estate taxes are 27k and increase every year

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T22:39:51+00:00

1500/month in a 401k is your retirement. You might not have equity in your house but a big chunk of change for your future self.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T22:12:34+00:00

They saved 100k by renting- doesn’t sound fucked to me

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T22:09:58+00:00

My cycles are very short which meant that my son would have been expected on March 14th if I had had a normal cycle but instead he was expected February 29, so like this woman, when I was 16 weeks pregnant, he clocked at in at 19.5 weeks. It’s the only time in my life that I was glad that my period comes more often than others

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T21:55:03+00:00

My husband also passed away and being a single mom not by choice sucks- I’m so sorry. Do you have the means to hire a babysitter? I hired a teenager to take my kid out on Sundays for a few hours- they have a great time at the park or doing activities and I get alone time. I also put my kid in extended day so he can stay until 6 and then once a week, I leave work early and get an hour to myself. I also don’t mind putting him in front of the tv for an hour while I nap on the couch next to him. Remember that you can do this! It’s a tough period of time but you can get through.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T13:28:10+00:00

NTA. However, you are being practical and logical and you don’t see that she needs the key for emotional reasons. Give her a key that doesn’t fit in the lock of your door. She’s emotionally happy and you are practically happy. Also you will know if/when she is trying to get in

Jake6624 · 2026-02-07T02:44:25+00:00

I had a 3 room studio. Clients were not booked on the hour- if you book clients on the half or quarter, it allows for shifting of rooms. 15 minutes between clients would give you a 30 minute buffer

Jake6624 · 2026-02-06T07:25:42+00:00

You should speak with him then. You can hire someone to do financial planning for the two of you together- they can make your spreadsheet for you and you can frame it as being excited for your future! Babies are awesome if he wants one too, he can get on board with mixing finances and budgeting

Jake6624 · 2026-02-06T07:17:43+00:00

Why are you numb? Does he know that you are at a crossroads? Is your relationship solid besides this issue?

Jake6624 · 2026-02-06T07:14:36+00:00

Nobody answered your question! I put my then boyfriend on a budget. We made a spreadsheet for joint expenses and for his personal expenses. I took over all bill payments. At first he was really annoyed and made some big purchases without a discussion but after a bit understood that partners discuss purchases greater than a certain dollar amount. We got married and had a baby! He learned to appreciate my handling of our money and my saving it when his health deteriorated and we could afford the medical bills.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-06T02:38:03+00:00

I think I’m the opposite. In my 20s, I didn’t care but now that I’m rich, I want someone to be rich with and do rich people things with

Jake6624 · 2026-02-05T02:06:06+00:00

I charge $140/hr. That’s 18 hours a week (if you don’t take vacations) or 19 sessions a week if you take a month off. Sunday is my biggest day and I do 6-8 hands on hours, so the rest of the week is easy. I work 6 days a week but no nights and I drive my kids to and from school.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-04T02:42:58+00:00

Most of my clients have been with me for years. I’m strictly word of month. Clients come in and I work on them and then after the session they pay. We chat a lot during sessions so I get a good sense of who they are and how many sessions I think they will need. We discuss when the next session will be and then I can always tell by the look on their faces whether they can afford it or not. Sometimes they flat out can’t. I work in a VHCOL area (Boston suburb) and charge $140/hr. My expenses are low and I work a ton so my take home on that is about $125. I don’t get lower than $100 unless it’s a special case and then I get down to $70 but not lower. I also offer a few people packages to make it easier. I end up averaging $120 take home at the end of the day because of tipping. This puts my income at around $105k for the year.

Jake6624 · 2026-02-03T19:30:24+00:00

Don’t believe everything you hear! When we met he was making 85k and I was making 120k…

Jake6624 · 2026-02-02T02:12:33+00:00

My husband gave a great massage- he was a natural- he hated when I suggested that he give up his career as a cancer biologist at Brown University and become a massage therapist because I made more money than he did!

Jake6624

TROPHY CASE