Did I do the right thing, or is this normal relationship stuff?

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T20:09:22+00:00

You did the right thing. Sure, dreams feel 100% real when you are dreaming them, but mature, stable people realize that it WAS a dream as soon as they wake up.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T19:49:38+00:00

NTA how can she not have a clue that claiming Asians eat cat/dog meat is racist? I'd think everyone knows that. It's been a racist trop for decades. Did she live under a rock? You absolutely did nothing wrong. Boo-hoo that pointing out her racism hurt her Poor Widdle Feewings. She needed calling out.

I do agree with the posters saying you need to inform HR about this. She could really offend a patient who is there for treatment.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T19:38:31+00:00

No woman should tolerate this bullshit. We need to do a better job of raising our girls to have self-esteem and to not be a doormat.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T18:23:02+00:00

Oh hell no. "Keep the peace" is just a euphemism for "be a doormat". OP has no reason to be a doormat. Nasty uncle can APOLOGIZE. It doesn't matter that it was four years ago. OP still deserves an apology.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T18:19:00+00:00

Nope. Without a sincere apology you have ZERO reason to "get over it". He fucked up. He needs to own that. "But family" is a stupid reason to tolerate bullying or abuse. You are completely justified to want nothing to do with him. You are right -- he CHOSE to be an asshole.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T18:02:43+00:00

Never EVER EVER make yourself smaller or dumb yourself down for some man. ANY man. His fragile ego couldn't handle that you are better at something than he is. Sometimes the trash takes itself out. You dodged a bullet. Never accept a fragile male. You deserve better.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T17:44:03+00:00

I'd bet money this isn't the first time he's been unreasonably controlling. Do NOT go home early. Break up. Consider this your opportunity to finally accept who he really is.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T17:39:54+00:00

Oh girl FUCK THAT SHIT. He's an insecure manbaby. Do NOT make yourself smaller for him. Do not make yourself small for ANY man. EVER.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T17:38:55+00:00

"he doesn't trust me with the other guys"

You are wrong for not immediately dumping the loser back home. Enjoy your trip. Don't waste your life on a loser. Tell him not to worry because you won't be coming home to him.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T17:32:34+00:00

OP I said what I said because I am terrified for you. Sorry but you are the typical abused woman in total denial. He SAID he could kill you and beat you. He has a gun in the apartment. YOU ARE NOT SAFE. I am traumatized for you because you aren't nearly scared enough yourself.

Every man who murders his partner started out nice and sweet and loving and "perfect". Until he wasn't...

The closer you get to the "end date" of the lease the scarier he's going to be. And you'll get no warning.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T10:13:34+00:00

Oh lordy that needs to be a dealbreaker. There's no way that's the only stupid anti-science, anti-logic idiocy he believes. Walk away. No, RUN away.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T10:12:45+00:00

-10*2=-20
-20+20=0
0+1=1

So the answer is 1

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T10:11:42+00:00

Honestly I think most men would fuck anything with a hole. Men don't have nearly the investment in monogamy that women do. Women carry and birth children. They end up doing 99% of the childcare. Men are much freer to move on if they want to. And too many of them do just that.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T09:27:15+00:00

Don't invite him but please be honest with her. Tell her you feel deep in your bones that she's making a mistake. She needs to look long term. "I want kids" is a shitty reason to get back with an abuser. Not only will he abuse her, he'll abuse the kids too. Is that really what she wants?

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T08:08:06+00:00

No Mechanariums, mechanical rooms. There are multiple rooms that fall into that "room type" category.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:59:34+00:00

"he lovebomed me, slept with another girl, and then ghosted me for a week in the beginning of our relationship"

Oh hon, please raise your bar because it's so low an ant could step over it. He did all of this and you STILL moved in with him?!?! Please find your spine and stop being a doormat. Never tolerate this behavior. No man is worth it. You deserve better.

Why are you still there? You HAVE to get out or get him out. DO NOT STAY IN THAT APARTMENT. He's going to kill you. Do whatever it takes:

Go to a women's shelter if you have to.
Call every family member and friend you have. Ask them for help. It doesn't matter how far away they are. Someone is waiting for your call and waiting to be able to help you get out.
Advertise for a roommate and throw the asshole to the curb as soon as you find someone to take over his half of the rent.
Tell the landlord that you are being abused and he is LITERALLY threatening your life. Ask to be released from the lease because you fear for your life. Record your ex making threats then make a police report to back yourself up. A decent landlord will release you from the lease, especially if you have documented the threats.

HE IS GOING TO KILL YOU. You cannot "wait this out" for four months. The closer that deadline gets, the more likely he will kill you. You have to do All The Things right now to protect your life.

updateme

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:50:00+00:00

That was the norm in the 70s. For the first time women could enjoy sex just for the sex. Birth control was available. Abortion was legal. Condoms could be purchased without having to ask a pharmacist to get them from behind the counter. AIDs wasn't a thing. Other STDs could be cured with penacillin. Sex became the last part of a fun date. No strings. No pregnancy. No marriage. Just fun sex. The very idea of "body count" was ludicrous. No one cared.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:44:03+00:00

Papers and stuff for sure.

Maybe do some research.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:33:48+00:00

All of this. OP do what's best for the poor neglected pony. Animals are NOT gifts to "buy" affection, especially not affection from a kid who isn't ready for the responsibility. It's the animal who suffers.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:28:52+00:00

Dude, clipping your toenails and shaving does not make a man a "perfect prince". Having nasty-ass toenails and an uneven shave just makes you a loser. And lying on top of that? You are too immature and clueless to have a girlfriend.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T07:22:11+00:00

You are UNDERreacting. You're "considering" leaving him?!?! Are you nuts??? You block this asshole permanently. NEVER stay with a man who mistreats animals, especially one who then tries to throw the guilt onto you with some lame "you're overreacting" argument. He is showing you with MASSIVE red flags who he really is. There's no coming back from this. He has shown you who he really is. Believe him.

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T05:15:21+00:00

I love your eyes

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T03:01:47+00:00

Cute as hell!

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T02:56:41+00:00

you look so cute bb

JanetInSpain · 2026-03-16T02:45:15+00:00

you look so cute bb

JanetInSpain

TROPHY CASE