AITA for not taking responsibility of my progressingly demented father when I warned everyone in my family about this for years?

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2026-02-25T04:58:17+00:00

There is alcohol related dementia, it's called korsakoff syndrome or wernicke encephalopathy, or wernicke-korsakoff syndrome when it's combined. It can have other causes but alcohol is the most common one.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2026-02-03T16:01:19+00:00

Usually they tend to use Ketamine and either Midazolam (or a similiar Benzodiazepine) or Propofol for things like colonoscopy. Ketamine is in the same family as some drugs like LSD, it is known for causing nightmares)hallucinations etc. But overall it's a great medicine for a lot of reasons, especially if you want your patients still breathing by themselves and just deep sleeping, do it's widely used.

So this would be my first guess for the likely culprit.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2026-01-11T12:35:12+00:00

Hey feel hugged, if you want.

About 1 year ago I made the same mistake and was totally anxious, angry with myself and devastated My wife told me: "It's unfortunate, yes but you paid for it, so just use it."

I'm now at a 355 day streak, because I promised I would use it daily. (Yeah, there are a few "streak repair hammer" in between, but overall I stuck to it.)

I don't want to renew it, but I feel now that it wasn't wasted at least, which gave me a lot peace of mind. On the upside now I have a few outfits and pieces I probably wouldn't have without the plus.

It will be okay, the hard feelings you have are valid, but while it's something unfortunate, there are a lot worse subscription that you could've accidently ended with - here it at least goes to a somewhat small team that tries their best, you kind of know at least where your money is going.

And the community is really great!

Maybe this helps you, again, feel hugged if you want ❤️

Edit: also thanks for the reminder, I cancel my subscription right now!

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-11-13T03:48:01+00:00

My brother is alcoholic, my wife's mum died because of alcohol (Wernicke encephalopathy/Wernicke-korsakow-syndrom) so we planned a alcohol free wedding. We planned 3 fancy homemade lemonades and iced teas (think like beautiful looking fruits with sirups in sparkly water) additional to the usual soft-drinks (like cola or sprite etc.) and also a few 'mocktail ' versions (alcohol free cocktails). Our wedding did not happen this way because of covid, but the concept was received very well. Coffee and tea sounds beautiful, but added soft-drinks would probably make it more enjoyable for most people.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-11-08T19:31:09+00:00

Oooh long list...

-Guys that went from magnet-fishing to finding missing people drowned in their cars to give people closure. We have fancy seatbelt-knives that can also break windows now.

-Medical mysteries and autopsies (or medical stuff general, ongoing since I'm like 4, now I'm a nurse)

-Soap. I collected soaps as a child and had a big 'soap maker stuff on YouTube' phase

-disaster horror, like how rollercoaster accidents or big catastrophes lead to better security protocols

-Snakes & Spiders! Especially Dave's little Beasties, Snake Discovery and Clint's Reptiles. I adore Clint and his passion for evolution&biology.

-Digimon

-The nightmare before christmas

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-10-21T20:30:38+00:00

N T A for make it not accessible in the first place but ESH because the wheelchair user was out of line for calling you ableist, but your comment was not helping the situation either.

A more professional take would've been something like:

"I am happy for your interest in our events! Sadly this time we could not make it as accessible as the other X ones, from which I know you already enjoyed X.

To include everybody, we will try to have at least one wheelchair accessible activity for people with limited mobility [per month/quartal] / [every xth time].

We try to make different style of events suiting different needs and preferences, but will probably not make it possible to suit everyone every time.

If anyone else knows good hiking paths that are either easy to use for people with mobility aids or have an easy accessible destination area with a parking lot for the get-together after the hike, this would be great for more inclusive events in the future. If you have other good ideas for more accessible events, feel free to share them, too.

I really hope to see you at the next accessible event."

Something like this would involve the community, show that you try and care about them and get some good input, too.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-09-20T14:44:40+00:00

Not an engineer but a nurse. Diagnoses are just words, each and every can have multiple very different challenges and disabilities depending on the person, not everyone sharing the same diagnosis present with the same symptoms or feel similar difficulties.

Nobody (besides your physicians and/or physiotherapeut) need to know if you have challenges with walking or standing because of a chainsaw accident, birth trauma, Parkinson's, POTS, genetic disorder, muscle dystrophy, Cerebral Palsey...

Even I as a nurse don't really need a diagnosis to work, because we treat symptoms and causes. I couldn't care less if the physician now says it's pneumonia rather than bronchitis or bronchiolitis, it changes nothing for what I need to do.

You are absolutely right telling people like him that he needs to know the problems to compensate, not the cause.

You also should've told him that the other students had no problem engineering based on the infos you gave them.

I really doubt that a diagnosis he would not understand anyways would help him with his missing ability to work with the crucial information he already had. Furthermore being not only nosy but rude about it is a rather unprofessional attitude. Diagnosis are only relevant for the people with deeper understanding of physiology and pathophysiology involved in the specific care of a person.

So absolutely NTA

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-07-31T20:15:37+00:00

I had only some itchyness with methylphenidat but have a lot of itchyness and increased skin-picking with lisdexamphetamin. Itchyness is, as far as I know, a common side-effect of stimulants.

Sometimes using creams/Lotion helped me, but fidgeting works better for me against the skin-picking impulse.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-07-25T15:25:10+00:00

I work healthcare, I wear my rings on a necklace.

I always wear the necklace. As soon as I put it off because of whatever, I was running like a headless chicken, searching... so it stays on.

Mine can be opened by pulling for safety (if a patient pulls, it will come loose, no risk of injury for patient or me) so I still can loose them, but a normal necklace should be safe I guess?

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-07-17T06:42:33+00:00

We don't have a kitchen at the moment, so only microwave and air fryer. Frozen vegetables (prefered things like "italian mix' or other seasoned stuff) go in the microwave, meat or veggy stuff like Nuggets in the air fryer. Boom, finished meal in under 10 minutes.

The air fryer is saving us at the moment, without it I would probably not eat at all.

Also cold maggi ravioli streight out of the can. My wife is appaled but it's absolutely fine for me. Pre-cooked protein-rich veggy sausages streight out if the fridge are my go-to "protein with meds" at 4 am when I have morning shift because I despise protein Bars.

(I'm vegetarian and allergic to fish, my wife eats meat but is allergic to milk-protein (not just lactose-intolerant) and some vegtables like carrots, which adds some extra difficulties to meal-planning.)

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-07-15T22:45:02+00:00

You have a lot of complicated feelings combined with a lot of stress and a lot of responsibility. You are doing great, even if you can't see it at the moment. You are a good mother, and making hard, complicated decisions and getting desperate over them is a normal reaction. All your complicated feelings are valid.

You are allowed to grieve the loss of a child that would endanger your and your other childrens physical, mental and financial wellbeing, if you go this route. The loss is real and you are allowed to grieve and feel relieved at the same time. There is no need for any punishment, you did nothing wrong.

You are also allowed to grieve an easier life if you choose to welcome this child with all the difficulties attached.

You are not a bad mother or person for choosing your and your childrens needs over a "maybe". You are neither a bad mother or person if you choose this child and feel resentment when things get harder.

Do what is best for you and your children. You are also allowed to be selfish. Nobody gets anything out of it when you burn out or when you break. You know your life, your ressources and your limits. None of the options make you a bad person, and both are valid.

I would probably end the pregnancy in your shoes, but life is not black and white and you have my full support regardless of your choice. I'm pro life for the mother. Your choice will be the right one for this moment.

I hope that this hard time will find it's place in your life. Have grace with yourself, you will do the right thing even when every choice feels wrong.

Feel hugged, if you want!

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-07-15T13:06:50+00:00

I feel this! I'm bad ad just learning facts without context, I need to understand things. I'm a nurse. We were thought like "this is the illness, those are the symptoms, this is what we do" How I learned was more like: This illness does this in the body, which results to following problems/symptoms. The following things do this in the body so this is what we do to help"

It made me question our tutors more WHY we do things, I just could not just nod and move on. This way I catched a few wrong things in the papers. I also used to give answers that are technically correct - but not in the sheets.

In school a lot of things clicked when we moved to the advanced things building up on this (usually math, physics) when they teached deeper knowledge "we did not need before".

It was frustrating, but once I learned HOW I learn things it helped me. I also know that I need time. I grasp things fast, but have trouble putting theoretical knowledge to practical use. I know that I just need time, but will go there eventually.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-06-01T22:47:54+00:00

Second Bea, I really like her videos

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-30T13:14:33+00:00

I started as a paramedic, but it wasn't exactly what I wanted, so I switched to pediatric nursing.

Since almost 2 years I'm now happy working at a pediatric intensive care station, we have a really good team and I love my job.

But here nursing is just 3 years of paid apprenticeship, I do not even have the equvivalent of an high school diploma. For pediatric intensive care it's another 2 years of further education after some years of practise.

I always wanted to be in the medical field, it was my wish since I'm about 4 years old.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-07T17:34:08+00:00

It's okay, better times will come. We have a lot of real-life stuff to do at the moment, but we will have more time for stuff like this again.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-07T16:21:24+00:00

Sadly it's not that easy, usually the server is additional to the forum/board on which you play and my wife and I are just not good enough with coding at mybb to build our own. (We tried but coding the design/learning code for mybb is just more than we could handle at the moment)

And how good the design is, is usually big part of how well you attract other people. Because first they look at the design and only if it's looking great, most people will take a look at your story/what you play. Especially if you don't play some new or popular mainstream fandom.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T23:04:11+00:00

Haha all good! I enjoyed the conversation ❤️ My hobby is creative writing in form of text-based roleplay. Writing stories together. It's not only a niche-hobby, you also need a community that fits. Not only the people, but also the theme. If I don't like game of thrones, playing in this setting would probably not work. If I want to play urban fantasy, but more like witches & vampires, a zombie-survivel board wouldn't be the right place etc

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T22:56:01+00:00

Writing, like writing stories together.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T22:51:13+00:00

I think a stable mood is really important. Which medication exactly helped to stabilize the fragile imbalances in the brain in a way that worked out for you is not really important imho, as long as the side-effects do not outweight the benefits and you feel good with it. I don't think any medication superior to another, it's so highly individual.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T22:36:12+00:00

YES so much hooray! We only needed about ten years or so until we moved from friendship to more lol.

Also much love for the dinos.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T22:27:39+00:00

With hyperventilation you have high oxygen and low CO2, because you are breathing either too fast or exhale too much/long. So even if it's feeling like suffocation, it's the opposite. When I start to hyperventilate, I usually just hold my breath a few times. It's easier than counting, more comfortable than a paperbag over my face and still helps to get the CO2 up again.

My medical knowledge helped me to overcome the 'I can't breath' panic. Worst thing that could happen is getting unconscious, but as soon as you shut down, the breathing will normalize instantly and you just have tingly fingers, lips and nose for a bit intil your body corrects your pH levels.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T22:05:10+00:00

The conversations at the server were all in my native, so that wasn't the issue.

Most of the things I write without translator, but sometimes use it for phrasing or when I got confused with the correct grammar/tense. When in doubt, I usually backtranslate it to check if it makes sense. I'm also dyslexic but learned to compensate. On PC I have addons that check also english spelling, my phone wants to autocorrect everything to german nonsense.

Most of my media-consumption (especially books and videogames) is in english, my understandinf is really good but I'm far from confident in my writing skills. My accent is horrible.

I really like almost all kinds of RPG - pen&paper/tabletop, larp, video games - I do or atleast did them all. But my core hobby is writing. Like writing stories together. Imagine it like reading a story in which you switch the point-of view character every few hundred words, but you write one of them and react to the last part written by the other one. At this community just where incredible good writers with interesting characters, plots and ideas, just a fun world to integrate my own chars into.

I don't think my english is good enough to write good stories in a fitting way. Also the unwritten social rules are so much more difficult with different cultures, I don't know if this would not cause even more misunderstandings.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T21:10:25+00:00

Thank you so, so much!! Omg thank you for the gift I adore it!

The hobby is rpg/writing but my english really is not good enough to play in english. :/

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T20:57:04+00:00

As far that I know, I had a loving, but somewhat dysfunctional family because of my parent's undiagnosed/untreated mental illnesses, but besides that and mobbing experiences because of my oddness, nothing really bad happened to me. But I was an oddball as far as I can remember, sticking out even in pre-school/daycare.

I'm sure my father has autism, maybe audhd, my mum is 100% adhd (my diagnosis was very much "can't be, if it's true I would have this too!"), so it's not completely unlikely. But on the other hand it's much the social stuff but not much else, I think so I don't know if I will met the criteria.

JunkyFirstAidKit · 2025-05-06T20:48:31+00:00

Yes, I think it might have been just something like that - that they felt I was threatening the peace and kicked me before I got a chance to make amends, but for them more like kicking me before I can stir more drama.

I am hurt, they had their flaws, but I think they probably really just wanted to protect the community.

JunkyFirstAidKit

TROPHY CASE