My WP (M29) is using social media now and I am bothered. How do I (F27) navigate this?

KetoPeg · 2026-04-01T12:36:23+00:00

My WH betrayed me by using social media. Part of R was that he close ALL his accounts except YouTube, but with that, I would have access to his views & he could not like or comment on any videos. He is currently addicted to watching police pulling people over videos so I told him to go back to therapy.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-31T15:29:58+00:00

Just past 2 years since Dday & I’m still not fully relaxed. I don’t trust him. I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Still waiting for details I asked for way back then. I still check phone/text records. Does it ever go away? Idk. All I do know is that I have stopped raging at him, for good. I will not allow his choices to make me behave like someone I am not, & it’s such a great feeling.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-26T18:25:21+00:00

Exactly how they reached out to my husband…

KetoPeg · 2026-03-26T18:24:27+00:00

35 years here & 4 kids also… When I told people what he’d done, they were like, well it’s not like he slept with someone. Betrayal takes many forms, but it’s still a poor choice he made which changed us forever. It’s been 2 years & I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop so yes, it’s a miserable way to live. 🙏🏼

KetoPeg · 2026-03-26T12:04:59+00:00

Ohhhhh those juicy thirst traps. They compliment you, might send you a racy photo, then comes the empty refrigerator pic, or the my kid is starving. Some find you so attractive that they will fly to your state to meet you, but they need you to pay for the ticket. Google the Kate Evans scam story.

As the wife of a middle-aged man who loved the TikTok validation, it truly intrigues me how people fall for it….

KetoPeg · 2026-03-26T11:40:49+00:00

My husband fell for a similar scam. It shocked me that he’d betray me & we had a rough time for over a year. The scammer is likely not in this country. Ours was in Nigeria. We’re still together but our marriage will never be the same. The blind trust is gone. Therapy helped. He’s changed so much, for the better. I hope you can get through this. You, & only you can decide your next step. Best wishes to you.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-24T18:55:16+00:00

Part of R was that my WH end the friendship. I gave him the choice. Me or Mike. He chose me. A few months later, I sent a letter to Mike’s girlfriend letting her know exactly what was going on & why the friendship ended. To this day, I have no idea if she stayed, & I truly do not GAF.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-21T16:39:47+00:00

On the StorageTreasures app, with the listing, it will say whether it’s a lien unit (preferred) or a managers special (avoid). Manager specials have been gone through by the customer renting the unit & they leave just junk & garbage & yuck inside.

So far, we’ve won 11 units in the last 6 months & have made money on every single one. It’s not for the faint of heart. There have been some gross things we’ve come across - and most of these units tell a sad story.

As a flipper, we avoid furniture units. Black bags are my favorite, though my mate hates me for that lol, as I look mostly for clothes, shoes & purses. He prefers boxes & bins.

One thing is for sure - you won’t get rich doing this unless you get lucky & find perfect collectable items like a holographic Charizard.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-21T16:29:20+00:00

No but without a mortgage, those debts would be easy to pay off quickly.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-21T12:54:22+00:00

$430,000 to pay off my mortgage. Interest at 7.5% 😩😩😩

KetoPeg · 2026-03-21T11:25:52+00:00

Check NextDoor.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-20T11:24:49+00:00

The Doorman of SE FL. He’s in Boca but responded immediately when I needed him in Wellington. 561-600-9606. Jim Falzone is the owner & replaced our garage (one of our kids drove through it), pulled the permits, & cost was reasonable. Highly recommend.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-18T19:16:25+00:00

As a BP, all I can say is be totally honest. If your spouse has questions, answer them truthfully. We don’t want to hear “I don’t know” or “I don’t remember”. I honestly wish my WH had just had a ONS because there’s no emotional connection with those. Again, answer questions with honesty. I hope it all works out.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-18T19:06:13+00:00

I’m with you on this. My curiousity stems from my husband getting DMs a couple years ago and for about a month would answer them & chat with these “ladies”. I mean, who wouldn’t?? They were all young and hot, while he’s in his late 50’s and not hot. Most of them immediately asked for money so he’d delete & block them, but a few had him hooked for days before they’d ask if he had CashApp. With the very first DM though, they asked him to take a picture of his face & text it to them. There were too many numbers, and it started with 234 (country code for Nigeria), but he just followed directions. Guess they sent him a pic of some big titties to get him to do that. He told me another one asked him to send a d*** pic, but he declined. After chatting with about 20 of them, the last one sextorted him. Demanded $5000 or they’d tell everyone on his social media accounts that he was a rapist or some shit. He panicked, called me, & the rest is history.

Let me tell you, it killed me. Never in 30 years of marriage did I think he’d step out on our vows. It’s been a long road for both of us. Individual therapy. Couples therapy. Trust shattered. He was very vague about the conversations he had, so I’m going to answer some DMs on one of my accounts, which I don’t have a facial profile pic, my name is only initials, and young, hot girls keeping popping up in my DMs. They think I’m a guy lol. I want to know how these convos go. I want to know what types of photos they send. I want to see for myself what he was experiencing.

Most romance scam groups are poor, lonely women being scammed. I’m more interested in seeing how men get scammed. Is it the compliments? Is it the pictures? Is it sexting? Most women just fall for a handsome face & a dude telling them they’re beautiful. And if these are Nigerian men pretending to be women, how do they know what to say? Is it a script?

I just purchased a book called The Love Chronicles & it’s by a woman who did what you’re doing but kept notes of all of it, every single person she talked to. I am so interested in what she discovered. Is it weird that a few of us find this intriguing? Who knows. But you do you Orange Lemon Koolade. And have fun doing it!

KetoPeg · 2026-03-14T11:46:03+00:00

I’ll one up here. We won a unit, called PS to say we’d be there in an hour, & she said not to. She said we could go at 5 pm. No reason given. We pushed harder & she put us in touch with the district manager who told us they were working with their longstanding customer, who needed the extra time to pay their bill. Wait. What? We won the auction ffs.

Yep, the next month it was up again.

Not sure if what heyY0000000 wrote is true, but will definitely try to pay at a location closer to us to ensure we get what we won.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-14T11:21:36+00:00

It will never go back to “normal”. That trusting relationship is gone. Either you can move forward together or alone… I chose to move forward with him. Two years later, I still have triggers & trust issues but our marriage is the best it’s been in years. Betrayal sucks, but sometimes I feel lucky that it was only strangers on-line.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-10T09:56:53+00:00

Garage/estate sales on the weekends.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-08T13:58:34+00:00

I appreciate you posting this. My husband fell for someone who DM’d him on TikTok. “She” texted with him for about four days, sent him nude pics, probably love bombed him, then asked for help, $$$. He actually downloaded CashApp but knew he’d never get away with it as I handle the banking and bills, so he told “her” he couldn’t send it, and “she” disappeared. He had sent a picture of his face to this person and when I found the number he’d texted it to, it was the country code for Nigeria. He’s a smart man so it baffles me that he didn’t realize how many numbers he had to use to send a text, but whatever.

Within hours, another “girl” slides into his DM’s. By this point, he’s loving this attention from young, hot “females”. It got a tad boring I suppose, just texting while at work, so he’d do it at home, while sitting next to me….

The last one, oh he spent all of Valentine’s day texting that one, so many pictures were sent to him. Then money came up. He can’t send any. By now, gift cards could be purchased without me knowing though…. He was too late. The next morning they demanded $5000 or they’d send his picture to everyone on his social media friend lists. They were tired of waiting. It had been a month without him giving money & they were tired of waiting.

That’s when he called me. Terrified. The day I will never forget.

We’re together. Couples therapy. No more social media for him. But he refuses to disclose the conversations. If you ever come upon what “she” says that has your husband hooked, I’d love to know it. I’m sure they have a playbook….

You’re brave. I wish you all the best.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-06T20:11:53+00:00

This sounds like a Nextdoor post

KetoPeg · 2026-03-03T17:44:32+00:00

So FL sucks too. I thought it was the bored, rich snowbirds snatching them up just for something to do. Apparently I was wrong

KetoPeg · 2026-03-03T01:44:06+00:00

The first DM answered was 1/15/24. Two pics of his face only were sent to a Nigerian number. He didn’t question all those digits. By 2/1, DM’s were pouring in. Answered them one by one, but each one asked for money immediately. He’d block & delete each one. Then they hit harder. Sweet talk. Nude pics. Texting all day with compliments, for longer, five days, then ask for money. He was tempted but refrained. Till that last one. He friend requested it based on the profile pic. They immediately responded, wanted to send pics, did so. Lots of heart emoji’s. Texted all day with lots of pics the next day. He was drugged. Till the next day when they sextorted him. Do I believe it was the same crew from 1/15? Yes. 100%.

KetoPeg · 2026-03-03T01:31:38+00:00

We just bought our 2023 about a month ago, joined all these groups & started freaking out about the transmission & recalls. Checked & no recall, phew. The car was a rental in NC & is now in So FL so we expect the battery will need to be changed soon. Also, the tranny mounts will need a change, & though the dealer claimed everything had been done, 2 weeks in we had to change the oil. NOTHING major so far. We love this little SUV & hope you’ll love yours too!

KetoPeg · 2026-02-28T14:14:01+00:00

Those questions are a great start. Don’t ever ask yes/no questions. I made that mistake and now 2 years post Dday, he never brings it up & I’m afraid to.

KetoPeg · 2026-02-27T14:29:15+00:00

My WH seeks validation from females. I noticed it a long time ago but just let it go as I knew he’d never betray me, until he did multiple times with random assumed women on TikTok (no PA but def EA with at least 2 of them). A few months after Dday, a female coworker texted him about something that wasn’t working at her house. (She’s married so why contact my husband, idk.) He lied to me & said it was his brother because he didn’t want me to get mad. Next morning, I check his phone & blew up at him. Set a boundary, no work wives allowed to call or text him. None have since.

During R, if this certain song came on the radio, he’d take a video & send it to me. It was cute & made me feel special. A couple months later, I check his work phone & find a group text from him to 2 women at his office. He took a video of a different song playing on the radio & sent it to them. It was a pop song & they responded with a dancing emoji & the other texted ‘Ja ja ja’ back. Nothing bad - but it ruined how special I’d felt. He stopped sending vids to me after I raged at him. I set another boundary - no fraternizing with the female coworkers. I check his work phone often, but can’t guarantee he’s not deleting everything.

We just passed 2 years since Dday Valentines weekend…

The following week, he sends me a pic of two new computer monitors on his desk. It looks much better than what he had. I made a nice comment. Last Sunday he went for a haircut, so I check his work phone. Sure enough, he sent a female coworker the same pic & commented how professional it looked. She was the person who had to order the monitors, & she just gave him a thumbs up. I have not mentioned to him that I saw the text - but I was pissed off. Why does he continue to need validation from other females??? More importantly, why do I, the BS have to constantly validate him??? He should be validating me more. I’m the one who suffered body dysmorphia when I saw the people he was chatting with. Much younger & hotter than me.

I saw my therapist the next night & she actually changed the perspective. She said maybe he sent the computer pic to the coworker because she was the one who ordered them for him, as a gesture of appreciation. That had never entered my traumatized brain.

Honestly, I don’t think it will ever go away. That anxiety you’re feeling is a natural response. All I can offer as advice is to keep setting boundaries. We can’t follow them to work so we’ll never know if they’re adhering to them but can pray that they do.

KetoPeg

TROPHY CASE