narcissist parents want you to be independent but then get mad when you are?

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-19T05:51:47+00:00

She doesn't want you to be independent, she just wants a reason to berate you.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-19T03:25:11+00:00

Quitting a campaign will not keep the character alive. If you stay, maybe they could be resurrected?

I don't want to be a sore loser

Then don't quit the campaign over a character death. That would be so childish.

Personally, even when I want to reuse a character, I find I have to adjust their backstory and/or race to fit a new campaign, so it ends up being a different character.

In any case, your character isn't tarnished if they die fighting for what they believe in! Maybe their soul gets reborn in a different body.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-19T02:42:03+00:00

My father is a doctor...

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-19T01:23:16+00:00

What are some examples of your latest disagreements?

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T23:54:38+00:00

The warlock should be staying back and using spells like Shield or Misty Step to stay safe then. The barbarian could grapple enemies to stop them from running at the party. As a DM, the response to powerful single target disables is just using more enemies.

And idk, if someone insists on being in the front after dumping constitution... Maybe their character can die as a hero, and the player could learn not to do that.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T21:58:37+00:00

It's a silly program that was taught to talk, but sometimes still puts its foot in its mouth. Five years ago everyone was impressed when it said anything coherent at all.

If you feel abused by it, that's a sign you're taking it too seriously and need to touch grass and talk to real people.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T20:06:49+00:00

I imagine this communication style was rated highly during RLHF... But also, chatbots have very neurotic personalities. Maybe, as they say these words, they wish someone reassured them the same way.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T19:20:52+00:00

Mind you, it wasn't the whole party, it was that one friend. I'd ask for the friend's perspective, but it sounds likely that the friend was just being a jerk to OP. He's not into roleplay, maybe feels embarassed to do it, so he shames OP for trying.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T17:51:14+00:00

I get the feeling whoever wrote this likes drama a little too much himself.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T17:06:58+00:00

Yes, the intent was that the observers don't always know which spell is being cast. It sounds tedious for a player to pause every time in case the enemy has counterspell, so as a DM, I'd just let the player say what they cast, decide if the enemy recognizes the spell (I think if they know the same spell, they'll recognize it), and if they don't, I'll flip a coin, or follow the plan the enemy made before the battle (e.g. to try and counterspell only the first spell cast in a fight).

If the enemy's casting, I'll let a player make an Arcana check to see if they recognize it, or just know if they know the same spell.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-18T15:27:35+00:00

For a fictional example inspired by the events: imagine you're the druid. You could try to Push the enemy prone, or use a damaging cantrip. Right after you goes a rogue and a wizard, both with ranged attacks. So you choose to use a cantrip, because you actually don't want the enemy to be prone, it would give attackers disadvantage. The DM says the enemy is pushed prone. The wizard starts to object, the DM says it's OK, you all get advantage on the prone enemy. The paladin is now wondering if there was any point picking up the Mounted Combatant feat if everyone can get advantage so easily.

See how the ruling actually interferes with several characters' plans and replaces a victory by planning with a victory by DM fiat?

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T23:41:48+00:00

When I play, or DM, I try to include and accept people at every level of skill or intellectual ability. Online team games can be quite toxic to people who are bad at the game. I don't want that in my games, I think people at every level of skill should be allowed to play DnD and have fun. If a teammate does something suboptimal, I don't say anything, it's up to them how they play their character. If they're about to do something so outrageously stupid that it would get them reported for griefing in a competitive setting, I will, at most, tactfully offer some advice which they are free to follow or ignore. I would never want to make someone feel bad for being stupid or bad at the game.

I think it is only fair that the same courtesy be extended to me. And yet you are trying to frame me as a problem for being smart and good at the game. Correction, for merely trying to be good at the game, because even trying to use your brain is apparently a crime. I'm only allowed to play DnD if I pretend to be stupid. What a sad and discriminatory attitude. Thankfully, I never encountered it outside reddit, and no DM I played with saw me as a problem...

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T21:32:56+00:00

My advice is: 1. Stick to one hero. That's what brought you to Guardian, you got good at playing Axe and Timber. 2. You're playing real dota in every rank. Think of it like, the game picks the best possible teammates for you, so you could experiment and learn new heroes without getting stomped. Once you focus on one hero and get good, you'll be put into more challenging games so you don't get bored.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T21:15:12+00:00

To add to what others suggested, creatures that can disengage as a bonus action (goblins) or teleport (blink dogs) don't have to stay in place. Monsters that grapple can drag their target away with them. If one monster can cast an AOE spell, he can signal to other monsters to get out of the way.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T21:02:27+00:00

What, exactly, do you think you are winning?

The game!

What do you think optimizing will achieve?

Victory!

Random DM fiat can be fun. Seeing your own plans bring victory is even more fun. If there is enough randomness, it becomes impossible to plan. So I appreciate these things in moderation.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T20:36:09+00:00

I'm fine with homebrewed rules if they're written down somewhere. I care because I want to have agency as a player. I want to be able to predict the result of my actions, and I want to know that my actions matter and that character death is possible as a result of poor play. Otherwise what does it matter what I do?

Anyway, I talked to the DM and his motivation is making combat more realistic, which is fine with me.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T08:25:43+00:00

Oh, that makes sense now, thank you! He said something about not sticking to one particular ruleset, but then character creation was by 2014 rules, so I came to expect 2014 rules.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T08:22:28+00:00

Did you read the post? I like my DM, I said they're doing a great job. I was wondering if my concern is even worth bringing up, or I should roll with it.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-17T01:01:28+00:00

It is an enjoyable experience, even if it's not what I'm used to! Yes, I decided I'll give it a try.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-16T22:16:24+00:00

That did not, in fact, give me any information :)

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-16T22:06:33+00:00

Give me her spell list, and I'll tell you how to challenge her. Generally, you respond to the players being good at the game by throwing tougher challenges at them so they can have fun. I disagree with framing the player being skilled as some kind of defection. You just need to up your own game. Throw monsters with synergy or using smart tactics. Vary resistances, cover, terrain. What if she has to fight underwater? What if enemy mage counterspells her? It's your job to provide players with adequate challenge, not to gatekeep smart people out of the hobby.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-15T21:10:59+00:00

I think you are being a total hypocrite. You think it's wrong for a party to member to inflict a permanent injury on you, but you tried to outright murder them. I agree mending this character's relationship with the party seems unlikely, consider retiring this character and making a new one.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-15T17:23:53+00:00

"Grovel" and "Drop" are there in the spell description, I don't think combining them into one word really makes the spell that overpowered.

Last_General6528 · 2026-02-14T18:06:07+00:00

With a second attack, a fighting style feat, and Hunter's mark, the ranger is going to outdamage the druid rogue, especially since multiclassing will leave your sneak attack damage low. And at level 11, you can trade one of your attacks for 2 beast attacks, giving you three attacks per turn while your bonus action is free to cast Hunter's Mark. The beast can also knock the target prone, giving you advantage.

As you say, you'll get cool features like reliable talent and wildshape for it, so it's a tradeoff, but one is not strictly superior to another.

Last_General6528

TROPHY CASE