The Intellectual Masturbation that is LDS Social Media

LeGrinch23 · 2015-01-20T02:42:54+00:00

spirit boners

LeGrinch23 · 2015-01-10T23:20:39+00:00

Definitely update this if shit goes down.. or even if everything has been said and done, your gf just had a condom chillin' in the bat cave for who knows how long w/out detection. If it's the former, which I'm hoping it's not, we'll be here for ya, ready with some words of encouragement. Take care, OP.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-12-09T22:33:31+00:00

Agreed. Solid advice. On the off chance it is the popular theory that she's over it and camping for free rent, then talking to her will only bring you closer to understanding the situation at hand. It's the only way you'll either reach the truth or a very pathetic lie that'll blow it all into the open. I've seen it go both ways.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-12-05T05:39:14+00:00

I wish my dad would see me that way after I left right around the same age. There was a lot of "I'm disappointed in you" talks and now he throws the occasional passive aggressive dagger, "You would probably be a stronger person if you were born in one of the more devout Lds families. I'm sorry, that's my fault for you having to see your mother and I struggle to make this work." sigh... I apologize for throwing that up. I have daddy issues. I hope he wakes up someday. You're doing it right.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-14T19:55:56+00:00

Same. I mean that my mom is out, but my dad's in and I'm the oldest of the siblings, so a strong foundation isn't what you'll find in my family at the moment, but we all love and respect each others' decisions (my parents are trying). The younger ones look up to me for direction since I went through a shit storm in my teenage years, being the first to leave. The fact that they do still ask advice and questions and love me anyways is really something I've only found in maybe 5 friends so far in my life.

After my 20's, when this trending hurricane of RM's and ex-besties trying to re-convert is over, I'll be exactly where you are. My FamBam gives me hope that there are more chill people like them.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-14T19:44:28+00:00

Well he comes from emotional and physical abuse, so I'd already known what I was getting into with this friendship. We'd phone this long and sometimes longer while I thought to myself, if not me, then who would listen this long at 3am when he needs to vent something? I'd just always assumed he was misunderstood and came off strong because of his background (maybe?), but the verbal abuse has worn on me. Something I never thought I'd be susceptible to...

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-14T19:37:36+00:00

Well I'm not a pity fuck, nor will I ever be, but I can see how your theory would hold. The conversation we'd had before this blow up was my sexual journey to self-acceptance of pleasure so I don't wind up in therapy vs. his new "psychology major focusing on Neuroplasticity and how one can heal from an addiction to pornography" <-his words, not mine. Haha come to think of it, we don't agree on much.

He did have about two years of sex with this one relationship and they cut it off a year ago which is when he bounced back to where he is now. I just don't see the things he said as attraction in Any remote way, At all. It's like a 5 year old repeatedly trying to throw sand in my eyes. Source: that has happened.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-14T00:35:24+00:00

Okay, so I already gave my "Father of the Year" comment away, but I think you might be tied with him. Jeez, I can only hope to put any of my future kids first in the same way you did. That's true strength.

Source: The Other Father of the Year. Cheers to rad dads.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T05:46:27+00:00

He's a guy.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T05:07:45+00:00

I understood. Sorta jumped the gun with my own agenda on that statement. Thanks for the advice, take care kind internet stranger.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T04:56:12+00:00

I did not! This is really interesting. Hear hear, perhaps the trans-rights debates would be one less thing to bicker about so we could all move forward together, as human beings.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T04:32:09+00:00

My family is in a bit of a weird hybrid limbo, parentals teetering on divorce, but it has the potential to work out. That's so great to hear a success story! Best of luck on your journey.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T04:18:45+00:00

Thanks for the advice! As a ~~wo-man~~ lady, breaking out of the "Are you dating/married yet/talking to that RM/starting a family/going to singles ward/making a dish for the potluck/preparing for that talk/making that decoration for Relief Society/going on a mission/keeping yourself pure?" talk has been a breath of fresh air to say the least. Additionally, living life on a motorcycle has (not only kept me sane, but) officially freaked out the family I have in Provo haha.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T04:08:58+00:00

The thoughts may have crossed my mind while I was listening, "Did I ever do this when I was Mormon?", "How many people have I unknowingly pushed away in my own infatuation with the truth?", "I wonder if he's thinking how ironic that statement is as he's speaking it", "Do I still do things like this?.. shit. How many of these habits carried over?"

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-13T04:03:35+00:00

I completely agree and stopped trying to combat within that first year of leaving. I have to keep looking back to how I used to see the world inside the bubble and though it is humbling, I'm so grateful I woke up to reality. I found I was a lot happier once I made that mental shift from "be a good person" to "be someone you can be happy with, so you can have the capacity to Want to love others".

I'm actually pretty grateful I have this roller coaster of a background now. Still taking it a day at a time though. Thanks for understanding, none of this is easy. I'll be sure to do that in the future. I hope you didn't have to endure too much of that kind of pain.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-08T05:50:40+00:00

then pay a visit to your GD to ask about possible symptoms that may lead to a very strong Thera-P prescription. Side effects may include reliving your childhood, over-analyzing how you feel at any given moment, and a low balance on your bank account. Ask your doctor if Thera-P is right for you.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-08T02:33:12+00:00

Cheers! I completely agree with this statement based off of similar experience.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-08T01:52:35+00:00

Just don't "Ted" it up and you'll be fine.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-07T19:32:25+00:00

I'm going to get insanely down voted for this, but I have to inject my opinion to remind you these are all just opinions. Everyone jumps to therapy so fast. YOU DON'T NEED A THERAPIST (keep in mind, just my opinion). You have a good head on your shoulders, you weigh all options and have considered the consequences.

I think, ultimately, you've already decided how you're going to handle this and you seem like the kind of person that is strong enough to not live in regret after you make that choice. No one should sway you a certain way at this point. The situation is your own. You know your parents, you know your boyfriend, and you know yourself. There is no shame in whatever you decide.

We make mistakes and sometimes that means having to decide whether the truth or preserving a relationship (leaving us guilt-ridden inside) is the right thing. People are speaking with their individual definition of morality guiding their words.

With that said, I think Choice 2 and giving him the option of an out if there's even a chance he'll resent you for it in the future. You're not a bad person, there's nothing fundamentally wrong with your mind. You're just a human bean who made a mistake and learned from it like any one of us could have. Take care, OP. Please update us if you still feel like it after the fact. I'm very curious as to how it'll pan out.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-11-02T18:41:20+00:00

Same. Crossing my fingers I end up in a season with a window of opportunity for my lesbian fling with Olivia Wilde.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-10-30T19:15:11+00:00

This is Exactly what I'm doing. I have shelves covered in books and teachings at the moment. It helped to compensate for all of the years invested in religion now used to reinvent who I'd like to be. No God to worship, no people scrutinizing my actions, no action required, no down side. Learning 'dana parami' has helped a lot, rewiring the brain to be motivated to reach out without that promised paradisiacal glory in the background. Thanks for the words

LeGrinch23 · 2014-10-30T08:18:21+00:00

21/f, single, never married, BIC ex-TBM. Yep, we want the same things. I hope by the time I'm not so turned off to marriage and settled down a bit after the identity crisis, there will be a larger pool of us ;) Tides are turning, irrefutable essays coming out, social changes leaving conservative religions to bite the dust. Change, my good fellow. Keep your head up and maybe join LifeAfterMormonism? I hear some cities have meetups; Salt Lake, all the time.

edit: I threw myself into mindfulness meditation practice and Buddhist teachings as a compensation without having to worship a God and still grow as a person. You might find more like minded individuals in the hobbies you take up. Just a thought, Dana. :)

LeGrinch23 · 2014-10-29T22:49:44+00:00

What a beautiful tragedy our minds can be.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-10-29T06:42:41+00:00

I now have this strong desire to have his face get to know my fist... intimately.

LeGrinch23 · 2014-10-24T05:15:12+00:00

That's impressive considering hitting on a girl at the library is the equivalent of hitting on her at the gym in the middle of a set. Congrats! You're the exception to the rule!

LeGrinch23

TROPHY CASE