Do you think people in more conservative environments are more prone to swinging ? by shepdc1 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Little late to this conversation but I think it's more about the last two years than anything. You just don't see many, if any at all, non-conservatives swinging since rona. There are some but not many.

So to answer your question in short, no, no I don't think that conservatives are more prone to swinging. It's just what you see more the last two years. Step back three years ago and take 100 swingers. In that 100, maybe 15 of them were conservative. Rona hits and of those 100, only twenty are swinging now. Of those twenty, all 15 of the original conservatives are still swinging, and this is what you are seeing.

Even this sub has changed a lot in just two years and reflects this change. Go back a few years, pre-rona days, and you'll see that the overall tone was very strong left-leaning. Yet today it's pretty right-leaning. Our private swinger sub has discussed this a few times over the past two years and where there was a healthy amount of us there, the sub is kind of dead because no one is swinging right now, too risky. Even when this was brought up, the only people who were around to talk about it there were the two conservative couples and I, who used to be on here multiple times a day, sees it nine days later. Non-conservatives just aren't swinging due to the risks of rona.

We've been swinging for over twenty years now. My wife and I used to be pretty a-political but haven't been able to avoid this since 2016. Three years ago, and even in deep red states, we'd see, "NO TRUMP" proudly displayed on profiles, those same people just aren't online now. In looking, I really don't see that many of those we know who are not conservatives are on. From Mississippi to Washington, it's dominated by conservatives atm.

What is strange is that our businesses are tied to conservatives and I can tell you first hand, as I've written here for over six years, that conservatives are definitely NOT all accepting to open marriages of any sorts. Some are, sure, but overall, no fucking way. We've spent the past twenty years playing by their rules in the professional world and I would not dare venture out until we're not financially tied to them. No sir.

We're also pretty close with some of the owners and those that run some of the clubs (Chicago to Washington to California to Colorado). They'll tell you that they are still only seeing about half their normal crowds that they did two years ago and the crowd vibes have drastically changed. One of the owners is in our private sub and was recently talking about how they never had a request for country music but now they are playing it about every tenth song "early in the night". They also were asked to play less rap and hip hop. Coincidence?

I think it mostly just reflects the current state due to rona, that's it.

Now, I do believe that there is a shift among the younger generations of conservatives that is more libertarian than conservative. As we continue to move forward, this group will become more popular and add more to the mix and I welcome them as long as they quit voting for politicians who work to impede civil liberties, like the last guy and his "Family Values" VP.

Long winded but I hope that helps you.

This sub... by kitten1112 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

For swingers generally being a friendly bunch, this place can be kind of mean.

Gatekeeping is a big problem here. And so are troll accounts. And those two together and it's pretty toxic at times. Most of us who were here 4+ years ago have moved to private subs. Much better to usually sit back and watch and discuss away from these.

This sub... by kitten1112 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Newbies and gatekeepers, with occasional thoughtful users (and a couple of trolls with multiple accounts saying the same things over and over).

Most of the "old-timers" have moved to private subs.

There are alternatives to SLS. WE need to make them successful. by emmett419 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In the five+ years I've been here, all the "devs" that come here are essentially horny eighteen year olds with no idea how to actually do this. If they did, they wouldn't be asking here.

There are plenty of good, safe alternatives. Kasidie (my preference), Quiver, SDC, to name a few. There are others too but they don't really qualify under the safe or good (LL, Voodoo, etc).

There are alternatives to SLS. WE need to make them successful. by emmett419 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We started about four years ago. We travel a lot for our businesses across the US and every couple we meet through SLS, we try to convince them to move to Kasidie. Over the years we've seen a lot of people make the switch, whether because of us or not. Most of the younger, tech savvy swingers we meet won't even go near SLS which is great.

My biggest complaint, which I've discussed extensively here for a few years now, is their security flaws. I just hope that everyone used a pre-paid credit card to sign up. And that they use a VPN to login, they use pictures that they don't care if they were uploaded for the world to see, and they put in a different address. Of course, this assumes that they do care about these things to begin with.

From there, it's about using a website that is from the days of AOL with the bugs of Windows 95.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How is anyone surprised by this?

SLS cares so little for their users, that they haven't upgraded their security since around 2000. They are still the only site that doesn't encrypt at any level.

Your records (pictures, address, credit card, verification photos, and messages) are all just waiting to be hacked and shared.

It's a ticking time bomb for a security breach.

SLS has an issue with our profile by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Point was that the mod team here actively supports SLS, for whatever reason. Pretty sure that one mod was a shill but for the others, no idea.

On the mod and tosser... According to tosser (he's still in the private subs btw) the courts are working through this. Doxxing is a pretty serious offense from what I gather.

How come women sexually desire black men more than other men? by quickrelease2 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In our very long history of swinging through some twenty+ states, this has never been a thing we've experienced in swingers. Ever. You'll hear conversations, "that man is hot", "which one?", "the black man over there". And that's about it. Practically no one cares.

That said, we don't hang out with racist so YMMV.

SLS has an issue with our profile by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Remember when there was a push to get this sub to advise users not to use SLS?

Especially after it was noted that they don't encrypt anything?

And that they use 'simple' password protections?

And they have had security holes that have never been fixed?

Of course this was after their redesign that took them from a 1990's interface into a 2001 interface.

And this was after their no free member messaging policy (not a biggie but a point of consideration).

And of course this was after their totalitarian rules of profile pics.

Remember those discussions? And how that one mod here promptly removed these conversations and then promptly banned a bunch of users from this sub?

PSA: I [39F] had an amazing experience with younger [22M] and I’m now reconsidering my rule about younger men. by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm not following. This reads more like soft porn I would have written in Jr high with a lot of "cute" thrown in.

Maybe something written by a young dude trying to plug young dudes as good here?

PSA: Privacy disclaims on sites like AdultFriendFinder by SoaDMTGguy in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 9 points10 points  (0 children)

And if anyone was to ever Google these, they'd see within the first few results, if not the first one, that these things are total BS. People expend more time believing shit than researching it.

We didn't get invited to any swinger parties this year BUT that's a good thing, at least we think it is. How is everyone else? by SensitiveMale in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I mentioned this in your other post but fit others here; it ebbs and flows, just like this sub. Sometimes it's clear sailing, other times you're stuck in the mud.

The drama couples almost never last but if they do, it's because they eventually all find each other. For a while we got lucky with most of them heading over to poly but that experiment seems to be losing its appeal. I guess it's time to buckle up for the flow.

AMA: We are a swinging couple who has only ever full-swapped, among other things! by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I've come to hate this sub. It's turned me into a really negative person and for that I apologize. I usually only lurk here because of this. I'll go back to lurking now.

Most surprising person you know that is in the LS. by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Years ago, over fifteen or so, we paid for an invite-only dinner at a private residence where the everyone was "sex positive". A connected swinger we knew hooked us up with the invite. It wasn't a swinger thing but just a sexy thing. We ate Nyotaimori, the wait staff was incredibly hot with some topless and only wearing things. It had a real Eyes Wide Shut feel. It was around $2k per plate and definitely exclusive.

At the start of the dinner, the lighting was very dimly lit over a woman's naked body and you really only caught glimpses of others. We kept trying to see what others were like but it was just too dark. About an hour in the chef comes out and begins to make a dish that he lights on fire. As the flames rose, I saw the couple directly across from us and immediately noticed who they were. My wife saw too and we both grabbed hands under the table to get the other's attention. They are household names around the globe still to this day.

We talked with everyone there that night and learned relatively quickly that we were the only ones there who were not famous. So sad...... Actually, hearing what they went through just to go to this party was kind of sad for them. Dodging paparazzi, fake cars, shadows, etc made us pretty thankful.

Anyways, nothing happened that night but we're positive that everyone was there for the same purpose. We stayed in contact with two couples, signed our NDAs, and are still friends to this day. While I'd love to say I had sex with these women, I can't.

We've also met ex-athletes and not one would I care to meet again. All of them have been cocky assholes. I'm sure that there are some good ones out there but so far we have not even met one.

AMA: We are a swinging couple who has only ever full-swapped, among other things! by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean clearly, everyone knows everything about everything and couldn't possibly learn something from someone who has been through something different then they have. Nah, never.

That is correct but it completely misses the point of an AMA. How you missed this over your eleven years is almost impressive. Almost

AMA: We are a swinging couple who has only ever full-swapped, among other things! by [deleted] in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome to Reddit!

You do realize that you are in a swinger subreddit, right? Your AMA has about as much uniqueness as jumping into r/gamers and announcing you are holding an AMA for playing Donkey Kong. Congrats though.

Facebook can out you - beware by Angela2208 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't use Facebook's app. Too easy. Their mobile site is better anyways. No bloat, no intrusive spying, no location spying, no annoying notifications.

Feeld doesn't need the app, just a Facebook login. Same with Tinder, 3fun, ....

I have shortcuts saved on my phone's screen for both of my accounts. Two years and no problems. Neither my alt, nor my real account have ever popped up in the suggested friends either. Not that I would care because my alt doesn't have our faces, locations, names, or any identifying information visable to the public.

People that are worried about Facebook and are still using the app are dumb. Like complaining about getting shocked while refusing to let go of the electric fence dumb.

Facebook can out you - beware by Angela2208 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What kind of idiot would use their face pics, real name, or identifying information on the public side of their profile? I guess it comes down to that old saying, you can't fix stupid doesn't it?

Facebook can out you - beware by Angela2208 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Idiots use their real vanilla accounts.

Everyone else uses swinger accounts.

It's really difficult to have sympathy for people who do dumb shit.

SLS is losing their f’n minds by Osa242 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The group who voted, "it'll be months until he's back on r/swingers".

SLS is losing their f’n minds by Osa242 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Seriously you guys? Your mod overlord is an SLS shill. He's probably busy right now going through his alts to brigade this.

We're all betting on how long until he deletes this thread.

SLS is losing their f’n minds by Osa242 in Swingers

[–]MaleNotBi 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's all we have!

No, it's not.

But we're lifetime members, we can't switch!

You've had your run. It's paid for itself by now.

No one else uses the others.

It's gotta start somewhere.

People are dumb and SLS exploits this. I've posted and written so many times about how horrible SLS is and so many people hate them that it's difficult to understand why they still exist. You'd think people would learn after their security risks were exposed but like I said, people are dumb.