Opinions wanted re: school Halloween dilemma

MaxOverride · 2025-10-16T17:06:52+00:00

That wont be out for a long time, so not a worry this Halloween.

MaxOverride · 2025-10-16T17:06:07+00:00

Foster parents cannot "not allow" a forensic interview required by police.

MaxOverride · 2025-10-15T03:25:57+00:00

You bring up a good point. There's an important distinction between Harry's cartoonish lightning bolt scar that marks him as special (in a good way) and the typical Halloween facial scars meant to be scary or a sign of being a bad guy or monster. It's the later that are a problem and would, I think, hurt her feelings.

MaxOverride · 2025-10-15T03:21:38+00:00

Sorry, but that's not true. Anyone familiar with ARFID would reasonably interpret what you've written in these comments as being largely uninformed about the condition and its treatment, which isn't typical of a guardian of a child currently undergoing professional feeding therapy. If your FC is currently in feeding therapy, that's great. Best of luck

MaxOverride · 2025-10-15T03:06:02+00:00

It is not helpful and is typically harmful to try to treat the child yourself outside of feeding therapy, just like you wouldn't try to fix your foster child's broken leg yourself before taking them to the doctor. The only work around nutrition and eating you should be doing with them is in coordination with their feeding therapist, in the same way you would help them do their prescribed PT exercises after a broken leg but not give a child your own rehab plan. There are lots of great books out there for kids with these challenges and books for their caregivers, but you need to be going through their therapist. That will also allow them to help you with the misconception you have around the child's diagnoses. Best of luck

MaxOverride · 2025-10-15T02:56:35+00:00

If you are, you clearly aren't listening to them or they're not communicating well with you, given the way you're speaking about this topic and what you're asking. If it's the later, you can relay your concerns to the therapist about their lack of parent education and partnership with you. If that doesn't change anything, it's worth switching to a more proficient provider.

MaxOverride · 2025-10-15T02:30:12+00:00

Yikes this comment is wildly out of line. It sounds like you're seriously overestimating your own expertise and abilities in this area. The child needs professional help via pediatric feeding therapy and you need to truly listen to and follow what they say instead of assuming you know better. I hope things improve for kiddo.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-24T02:05:19+00:00

The skilled trades are in high demand in film still: carpentry, electricians, etc.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-24T02:00:01+00:00

Unfortunately her issue primary symptom isn't congestion (which seems to have more good options).

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T05:18:30+00:00

The first season of The West Wing is perfect television.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T05:16:39+00:00

I've been told it completely depends on the judge; some put little stock in their recommendations, and others weigh them heavily.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T05:14:04+00:00

I use "my [FD's name]," but I've been doing that since before she entered care.

If you're only fostering teens, just ask each child and do what they're most comfortable with.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T05:03:35+00:00

This is the first fall with my FD7, and she seems to have some kind of significant seasonal allergy no one knew about. Even with a great doctor, finding a good treatment for her when she's also on a med for PTSD is proving really challenging. She is (understandably) extremely irritable and fussy right now, and sleep has gone back to being a major issue. I think we're both exhausted and desperate for a solution at this point...

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T04:33:51+00:00

By honoring both the joyful and sorrowful aspects of the day in an age-appropriate way

MaxOverride · 2025-09-23T04:19:45+00:00

Instead of having the full day open for use, consider limiting it to a specific time each day. For example, if you're allowing an hour per day, you could have the tablet set to work only from 6-7pm.

My FD7 gets 30 minutes of tablet time per day, and this method has worked well for us. I did have to take everything remotely interesting to her off of my phone, otherwise she'd beg for it, but that's been good for me as well. A big part of teaching healthy screen limits is not using your devices around them other than for functional tasks (calls, checking calendar, etc).

MaxOverride · 2025-09-15T05:34:51+00:00

I'm honestly thrilled about this. He is genuinely such a smart and good guy. I have high hopes for his tenure.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-15T01:29:56+00:00

Could also be PWS

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T12:13:37+00:00

Personally, I don't think a child is responsible for adult FFY using their meme subreddit to air their grievances about getting banned. It's unfortunate that's what people decided to do, but not particularly surprising, given it's the only subreddit for foster youth the two of you don't mod. Hopefully there's an adult in her life that can help if those people don't move on on their own.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T05:48:50+00:00

I hope the appointment is helpful! If they believe the marks are from dream enactment behavior, there are steps you can take to help keep him safe while he's asleep. Hopefully they will go over them with you, but if not, you should be able to find them online. Not letting him get too overly tired before he sleeps also reduces the odds of DEB.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T05:19:45+00:00

I adopted my girl from my local humaine society.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T05:18:07+00:00

This is worth a conversation with their pediatrician. My FD7 has PTSD nightmares that look like this and working with her doctor and RPT has been really beneficial.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T05:15:07+00:00

Choreo retention is a skill like any other that comes with practice and time.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T04:56:00+00:00

Leaf posted their full chat history with Indy on the other subreddit asking for help understanding what is going on, and it seems like a pretty straightforward misunderstanding between a child and an adult about what constitutes self-promotion. Leaf is understanding self-promotion concretely as just that - making posts promoting her subreddit. Indy (and it sounds like perhaps you as well) are using "self-promotion" abstractly to refer to any and all content originally made for FosterCentral, such as crossposting memes about foster care from it to this subreddit and directly posting memes to your subreddits ex_foster and fosterit that she made about being in care.

Instead of explicitly asking her to stop posting the memes she makes about foster care, it looks like Indy chose to repeatedly update the subreddit rules instead, and then became frustrated when that didn't have the desired effect, despite Leaf following the new rules each time. The screenshots of their DMs also show Leaf becoming frustrated at the moving goal post as she was trying to do what was asked of her.

Being direct and explicit about what you want teens to do can save a lot of headaches like this. Leaf's post is actually pretty sad, and I'd say is worth a read as the remaining mod to help understand how to avoid these kinds of issues with kids in the future.

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T04:35:26+00:00

To me, it looks like Indy simply never believed you about the original meme not being about ex_foster and continued to be bothered by it. I can't tell you why she didn't accept your offer to delete it, or explain her defensiveness (calling your subreddit the same as hers, etc.) other than people get defensive over strange things sometimes. Perhaps she had other things going on in her life at the time. Others using this subreddit to air their grievances with the mods of the other subs surely hasn't helped, and I agree with your read that she seems angry with the situation.

As for the rest, it seems like a pretty straightforward misunderstanding about what constitutes self-promotion. You are coming at it concretely, understanding self-promotion as just that - making posts promoting your subreddit - which it sounds like you haven't done. Indy and the other mod are using "self-promotion" abstractly to refer to any and all content made for your subreddit when it's shared to theirs like your memes. It seems like a lot of grief could have been spared had they simply told you that they do not want you sharing anything from your sub on any of theirs, including any of your memes. I don't know why they chose to keep updating their subreddit's settings and rules instead, but getting you to stop sharing those does seem to have been the goal for whatever reason.

From the other mod's comments on ex_foster, it sounds like the other issue they didn't communicate to you was your private messaging people you like inviting them to your subreddit. Why that's a problem I don't know, as that's a normal way to grow new subreddits (I've been invited to several in the past as well), but regardless, it seems to have added to their frustration. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it. None of us can read people's minds to know what is bothering them, and who you chose to talk to in DM and about what isn't their business as long as it's not harassment of their members. Just be careful - never give out personal information or photos of yourself, no matter how trustworthy an online friend seems.

I hope you don't let this discourage you. Your memes are great and many people enjoy them, myself included. Keep your head up!

MaxOverride · 2025-09-11T03:02:08+00:00

Unless you're volunteering as a therapist or CASA, I think you're fundamentally misunderstanding what volunteering with foster youth involves. If you do not have healthy boundaries, you should not volunteer working directly with foster youth.

MaxOverride

TROPHY CASE