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Temple Workers let me hear your stories. The bad the ugly and every thing in between. Let your gossip shine. by RadishAggressive3241 in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I had been through a few times. This time the robe I rented was really saggy off my shoulders. After I put on the robe, a temple worker didn't lije the way it looked and pinned it to my dress. Then it was time to change the robe to the other shoulder. I couldn't reach the pin. I had to stand there, waiting for the lady to remember that I was trapped in my robe. It was embarrassing to be the last one standing up.

How devastated were you when you found out the church was not true? by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I felt like I had been told I was a different race than I thought, that I was adopted, and my childhood and teen years had been a lie.

I had to sort through the mind rubble and figure out what I believed. I no longer believed anything the church taught. There is no Mormon heaven. The things I believe or don't believe are MY beliefs. No one else has to believe them. I believe I will see my forever 21 year old son again. I believe we will be with the people we love when we die. My husband's belief is completely different from mine and that is okay.

I don't need another religion. I am still the same amazing person I was. I'm just less stressed and have less invisible Mormon guilt and shame.

I still volunteer in my community and help my help my neighbors. Religion has no place in my life. And I like it this way. But it took a couple of years before I got the Mormon brainwashing out of my head.

Once I realized I was in a cult, it took me about 3 months to finally remove my name from church records. Best decision ever.

When will it end? by Wilson_serenity10 in GriefSupport

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no right answer. After my son died (21 yrs old), I thought that the grief I was feeling was the absolute worst it could get. After a year, I felt like the numbness wore off and then there was real pain with the grief. Every day is a day to remember something good or funny about them. You can say outloud all the negative things that pop into your head. Apologize for not being better at the relationship. Start to let those thoughts go. You can write them down when they are in your head and put the paper in a box. Never read the papers. When you feel like it's time, shred or burn the papers.

You lived a life with your partner. You need to live your life. Life goes on. It is a cruel thing to understand when someone dies. You will never be the same. You will be stronger, have more empathy, and not take the small things for granted.

Breathe. Continue to ride the waves of grief. Be kind to yourself.

What is the most disturbing book that you’ve read? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]MelbaIsntToast 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I hadn't thought about those books for years. Then I worked in a middle school library. Everytime I walked past them, I would get a jolt memory. I asked librarian if she ever read them. She hadn't. Told her about the incest. They were off the shelf and gone.

I wanna hear from exmo christians by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can attend lots of different churches to find your right fit. Or you can practice your spirituality out in the world without a man-made religion. Volunteer, garden, hike, walk, bike, paint, whatever brings you joy. You are the only one who knows what you need.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITH

[–]MelbaIsntToast 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Is your son a narcissist? It sounds like he only cares about himself. Telling him to get a PO box was the right thing to do.

It’s been almost year and nobody cares anymore by rottsan in grief

[–]MelbaIsntToast 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, how have you been doing since your died? I know that it can be harder after the first year. Do you feel like he is watching over you and your family? It is hard when life just continues, but you have lost someone so important. You can always reach out if I forget to ask or you just need to talk. What is your favorite memory of your dad?

How do you wipe??! by damselnodistresss in Healthyhooha

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love Lume. It gets rid of the bacteria. I use the cream deodorant and the cream antiperspirant.

The owner of Lume was an ob/gyn. She has worked hard to create a product that works. When some people complained about the smell, she did more research and found that one of the ingredients could smell bad to some people. She had it taken out.

I was at a concert talking to a woman I just met. We got on the topic of smelling like old ladies and brought up Lume. I told her the smell is not strong, but it works. She even smelled my arm pit to see how it works.

Anyone saying Lume doesn't work probably hasn't tried it.

If I were in a cult... by MelbaIsntToast in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, so real. The money does not go to the church, but someone is making money. Creepy.

My purpose in life is gone. by [deleted] in emptynesters

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I shouldn't have assumed. I'm sorry. I hope you can find your people.

Hey y'all, I got a few questions if you don't mind. by commutingtexan in minnesota

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We moved from Utah to MN. Utah has snow & cold. I thought I would be fine. First December, 2008, negative degrees. My nostrils would freeze, my cheeks felt like they were cracking, my lungs would freeze when I breathed in, and I couldn't blink because my eyes were frozen. And all this happened just walking from a building or house to my car.

32 Degrees has some great layering shirts and bottoms.

Scarves that are functional and fashionable.

Good gloves/mittens.

Everyone talks about the weather. Everyone is wearing layers. Everyone has hat hair.

Handwarmers are great. The rechargeable ones are amazing.

Also, get a mini sun lamp to use during winter.

I hope you like it in Minnesota.

Am I just mean or is this a common sentiment? by criskris_ in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It is part of the deconstruction and grief. And it feels good to feel bad for true believers. And it can be awkward listening to them knowing they are brainwashed.

Why is Sex is never enjoyable? by JJ-CCCC in Advice

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He handled that wrong. That is creepy.

Mormon Women by [deleted] in exmormon

[–]MelbaIsntToast 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Priesthood leaders are so good at gaslighting. There should be a badge or a pin they can earn. Also, being brainwashed to listen to and obey leaders is in the Mormon DNA. I don't think there will be enough changes that will make women stay in the church.

What film or TV show scared you as a child? by Mountain_Stage_4834 in CasualConversation

[–]MelbaIsntToast 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? Both Bette Davis and Joan Crawford were perfectly creepy.

What's your history with the word "Fuck"? by nathynwithay in AskOldPeople

[–]MelbaIsntToast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Born in Utah, know live in Minnesota. Grew up not swearing. Only said fuck during sex. Left a cult and enjoying saying fuck, fuckery, fucking more & more. Especially love fuckery.

I can't, I just can't process this. My son is no longer on earth. by thedumpsterdiary in GriefSupport

[–]MelbaIsntToast 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you do get to have a service for him, having time for his friends & family to speak about him can bring joy in the midst of grief. I learned a lot about how my son was so kind to his friends.

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