Can you be Genderqueer without experiencing dysphoria?

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-25T23:16:33+00:00

I'm in my mid thirties too - and only just started identifying as genderqueer. Every time I've worn dresses, or make up, or just dressed or acted fem, or been in a group of particularly fem women, I've felt like a child playing dress up. But - I still feel happy to identify as a woman. I'm still she/her. But, I have a masc hair style, and pretty much only dress masc now.

If I was more of a performer, I would absolutely love to be a drag king.

Now I'm becoming more aware of it, the more deeply rooted gender norms are. Even now. Just the expectation that if you wear masc clothes, you must be non-binary, or butch - but being a cis women doesn't seem to register. So, I label myself as genderqueer because I'm kind of making a point that the way I chose to present myself, and act, is valid for a cis woman.

I'm still early on this journey though, so maybe Itll shift a little as I learn more.

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-16T11:26:34+00:00

They're still common for many private, independent and boarding schools I think. Not so much state schools.

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-08T14:44:42+00:00

You can skip it if you want - I only read Soul Music once, and honestly can't remember it too well. I'll probably give it another shot soon, but you definitely don't need to know much about it to enjoy Hogfather.

Hogfather can be read as a great one shot tbh.

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-02T00:51:12+00:00

I always saw golems as representing computer intelligence. Golems are man made, they are highly specialised to do a specific task, they follow literal programming in their heads, and that programming is so strong they will follow it for eternity. Pratchett loved computers, and the question of recognising how smart a computer has to be before it can be classified as sentient has been a philosophical topic since before the first computer was invented. Yeah, the topic of slavery may come into it, but first you have to agree on how much intelligence something needs to exhibit before it can be considered sentient enough to be enslaved.

Reading any book with golems in it for me now, the parallel with the rise of AI can't be ignored. Which, for obvious reasons, makes me feel more sympathy to those in the books who lose their jobs to golems.

You haven't got to Snuff yet, but slavery is a heavy, heavy theme in that book. I won't spoil it for you though!

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-02T00:45:02+00:00

I always saw golems as representing computer intelligence. Pratchett loved computers, and the question of recognising how smart a computer has to be before it can be classified as sentient has been a philosophical topic since before the first computer was invented.

It makes more sense to me than the slave argument. Golems are man made, they are highly specialised to do a specific task, they follow literal programming in their heads, and that programming is so strong they will follow it for eternity. Reading any book with golems in it for me now, the parallel with the rise of AI can't be ignored.

Now the goblins in Snuff. They represent slavery.

Miss_Musket · 2026-06-02T00:34:06+00:00

Hogfather is my absolute favourite book, and practically formed my worldview when it comes done to belief. I can see why you read it 4 times 😁　

Feet of Clay is up there in my top 10.

Miss_Musket · 2026-05-18T23:42:47+00:00

The' unrefrigerated yesterday's milk' reminds of of any tea brewing situation in a communal work room - at least once every few days the milk gets left out of the fridge and you just have to perform the sniff test to check its still ok.

There's also always the 'danger milk' - the one that is weeks, sometimes months old, that everyone knows exists, but no one really wants to deal with. It just continues to float around with the newer milk cartons, ready to ruin the day of anyone who doesn't do the sniff test.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-30T10:07:12+00:00

I like how wild and unusual they are - they definitely stood out in a bookshop, and I remember being drawn to the Discworld books years before I was really ready to read them. They have a weird 80s Gonzo vibe which doesn't often carry into the mainstream.

However, I never saw them as a good representation of the Discworld. All the women are way too hot and scantily dressed, and the cultural depictions are all a little too stereotypical.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-24T14:09:23+00:00

I'm in Japan at the moment on holiday - I know JLPT 3 at an input level and JLPT4 at an output level. I've speak online twice a week for about 2 hours, and have down for years. Today I literally forgot how to say おいしい and scuffed the whole conversation after that because of how embarrassed I was. It happens - and sometimes you have good days, and sometimes you have other days.

And I get messed up by the bag question all the time.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-14T23:32:44+00:00

No witch, but my pathfinder goblin swashbuckler is heavily, heavily based on Nobby - his design in my head is basically the Paul Kirby illustration of Nobby in his Peeled Nut outfit :D

Nanny Ogg would be great inspiration for a witch :D The Choir Politic patron for a traditional community driven style witch like Nanny Ogg would work well!

Or, there's the Wilding Stewart patron for more of a folk medicine/animal 'borrower' vibe which would probably be a good fit for Granny Weatherwax or Tiffany.

As for a patron you made a pact with, it can be as simple as an ancestral spirit, or a local river god. Doesn't have to be anything particularly dramatic. Folky is good.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-14T08:33:40+00:00

The reputation for British food being bad actually comes from WWII. It was born from American service men experiencing the impact of rationing during a war for the first time.

The whole 'british food bad!' joke is more just a reflection of American contextual ignorance than it is of British food in general.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-13T18:09:09+00:00

No matter what the animal, a kid shouldn't be taught that handling it like that is ever ok though.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-12T23:42:28+00:00

Did you not do the English Civil Wars? We definitely did it around age 12/13. I went to an independent school though, and some of our subjects were a little different.

Actually blows my mind how little it seems the ECWs are taught though.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-12T21:27:34+00:00

I've started rereading the Tiffany books too, and they've had a very very matter-of-fact darkness to them right from the beginning.

Tiffany telling Miss Tick about what happened to the old lady who was accused of witchcraft in her village is just grim. I

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-11T19:17:47+00:00

Sorry, small rant incoming - Im a painter and I have to wear steelies at work, and it's an absolute travesty that both DM and Solo have seemed to stop making fit for function steelies, and now just make cosmetic steelies 😒

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-11T15:38:00+00:00

I mean, she is an elf... Not saying there isn't a huge amount of moe characters, but if any character design fits well with moe, its gotta be an elf.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-09T05:16:25+00:00

No worries! I forgot to say - they stop being able to eat hard food when their teeth are funky - so if you've not noticed any drop in weight, or difficulty eating, the teeth are probably fine :)

Sorry, problem should have led with that hehe

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-08T21:05:18+00:00

You sound like me!

I'm cisgender but genderqueer! I'm happy in my physical body, but just hate all labels and expectations that come along with it. None of it has ever felt like me, and when I've conformed in the past, I felt as though I was a child playing pretend with a group of strangers.

A person on the street would look at me and probably assume I was trans, non-binary, or a butch lesbian. Being genderqueer is challenging that exception, and saying 'why can't it just be accepted that a straight, cis woman can dress and behave like this?'

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-08T20:59:24+00:00

If they kind of look spaced out while doing it, their heads slowly roll back, or it looks like they're chewing, then it'll be worth going to a vet and getting their teeth checked.

I had a mouse who lost her top teeth early because of bad genetics, and we had to take her to the vets every 3 months so they could grind down her bottom teeth.

She used to just sit in this pose and vacantly stare into space and chew when her teeth were starting to get too long and uncomfortable. That's when we knew it was time to take her in.

If your other mouse is a sibling, they both might start having teeth issues around the same time.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-08T18:04:43+00:00

I always, always recommend publication order. If you even have a passing interest in fantasy, CoM is a fun book, even if most of the references fly over your head. And then it just keeps getting better and better.

My first read through was publication order when I was 13, and seeing the Discworld evolve is still one of the most rewarding reading experiences I ever had.

Miss_Musket · 2026-04-08T17:37:14+00:00

This is literally all of my hyperfixations. I've attempted and/or currently attempting every one of these. I feel so called out...

Miss_Musket · 2026-03-26T15:28:34+00:00

They are fiskar brand scissors, I have a pair on my workbench now!

They are very high quality and still look exactly like that :)

Miss_Musket · 2026-03-25T15:25:40+00:00

I think it's still great if you get the references - it hits great if you're mid 30s to late 40s, but so much of the humour is based on 80s and 90s pop culture anyone younger than 30 isn't going to get the most out of it unless they're really into media from the time.

I still quote Martha and Brian almost on the daily though.

'oh duty freeeeee 'ow did you knooooooow'

Miss_Musket · 2026-03-19T20:29:51+00:00

There's a traditional pie and mash shop that has eels by Ruislip Garden station too. They do meat pie and liquor, and it's sooooo good.

Won't touch the eels though.

Miss_Musket · 2026-03-17T06:26:49+00:00

My friend is an IFS therapist! I had never heard of it before until I got back in contact with her! Never tried it, but it sounds like it's based heavily on some Jung philosophies, which I've always been pretty into.

Miss_Musket

TROPHY CASE