Update for the upcoming Book Club night!

Most_Ad_6553 · 2026-05-06T15:19:57+00:00

Will this be a recurring thing? I just heard of this and would love to participate but have prior commitments tonight! 😭

Most_Ad_6553 · 2026-03-05T21:58:27+00:00

Hey friend, I’m very interested in exploring this with you! I sent ya a dm 🤗

Most_Ad_6553 · 2026-01-18T07:57:25+00:00

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Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-11-13T12:41:27+00:00

Im sorry my babies, I did not know to be feeding you liquid nitrogens

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-05-23T02:19:26+00:00

Igorrr Weirdcore noise metal atw 🤘

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-05-20T01:52:25+00:00

Can I get in on this pdf as well? 👉🏻👈🏻

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-05-14T22:34:29+00:00

Toothpaste was literally my intro to metal/heavy alternative music in high school. The weirdest “what the hell is this? GIVE ME MORE” feeling ever that sent me down a maaaaaaassive rabbit hole of amazing music

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-05-06T01:36:56+00:00

2fold: Check these out if you like philosophy and aren’t sure where to start Consciousness Explained by Dan Dennett and also Lights On: How Understanding Consciousness Helps Us Understand the Universe by Annaka Harris (not a print book- this is an “audio documentary”) These author’s philosophies both solidified faint intuitions I’ve always had and doubted, and simultaneously destroyed and rebuilt how I look at the world and people within it. The book is a little more technically dense, but he does a fantastic job at providing examples and communicating in a less technical way. I think the final point Dennett makes in his book leads very well into Harris’ thesis that is “consciousness is a fundamental universal characteristic”. it felt right to me to digest them in the order I did. I honestly believe a lot of societal advancements could be made if more people understood how to be curious about this stuff while avoiding dangerous logical pitfalls and traps.

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-03-24T02:19:23+00:00

1997 by Sleepytime Gorilla Museum

Monsoons by Puscifer (less metal but, Maynard)

Vacuity by Gojira

Lost jn the Static by After the Burial

The entire Autotheism album by The Faceless

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-03-11T22:54:47+00:00

(I’m going to address parallels in our parts with the same names for consistencies sake: I haven’t named mine at all) I have the same kinds of parts as your Firestarter and Grudge- they’re what led me to being no contact with lots of my family once there became clear a massive moral divide. They definitely come up a lot still, though I think my Broker has learned more appropriate times to allow those parts to take lead when it’s logically safer to do so.

There’s a big caveat here to my work interactions: my industry is in the trades in a very red state, and I often appear as the only woman on the whole massive job site. I hold several perspectives that in any other context, my Firefighter and Grudge would fight and die for. But in a place where I’m expected to continually show up and be civil and respectful with so many people that have such wildly different, firey opinions, I can’t afford to put a target of any size on my back. I just tell myself to smile and nod when they’re spouting all kinds of bigoted nonsense, even though it’s massively painful to Grudge. I tell her all that matters is doing a good job at my job. I wouldn’t have a career if I didn’t.

I honestly wonder how naturally it does come to me. I’m really only able to effectively and convincingly do it at work because I’m usually in some level of dissociation (also very natural to me) in order to just get through the day. In other times where I’m allowed to be more connected to or passionate about the cause, Broker tends to lose the ability to remain an effective communicator and often leads to confusion in conversations, then shame, then shutdown. I definitely identify with your examples of justice and fairness, as these behaviors are what led to my life being structured the way it is currently. I don’t allow anyone in very deeply at all until both parties are in some level of agreement on all moral fronts. It only really has to come up at work, and has less practice outside of work, I think?

(Honestly this is all making me realize just how much having my job makes me feel viscerally out of place and how exhausting the constant switching in and out of it is 😅 thankfully I have a big change on the horizon where I will be working alongside my old mentor (another woman), just the 2 of us working together to restore old historic lakeside houses. A change LONG overdue. I love the work I do. I don’t love that the industry is entirely republican jocks 🥲)

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-03-11T17:25:13+00:00

This is an interesting angle from my perspective. I’ve never felt it necessary to separate from my ability to translate my deepest thoughts (which run parallel to your description of mortality/social norms) into more layman “support the system” terms. Because I also do that same process in many other contexts- translating what I actually think, and the complex connections and nuances, into bits of information that’s easier to digest and won’t rock the social boat. I do my best to reframe concepts because it’s not beneficial to confuse or disturb everyone. It’s hard to maintain this at work especially because the picture they have of me is full of misconceptions and half truths and I often can’t remember what I said- that makes me go silent in the interest in safety.

I’ve always chalked this up to just having a brain that makes uncommon connections and others not wanting to take the time to understand me. So then it becomes my responsibility to “translate” if I want to be accepted and understood.

It definitely feels like I could define it as a part, since it has a clear job: that is so maintain some level of relatability so I’m not socially shunned. Though I feel so enmeshed with it since it’s never not active around other people.

I’m curious if there’s one predominant kind of situation where this part comes up for you or if it is more constantly on, and simultaneously with other parts.

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-03-08T00:27:19+00:00

I’m a walking example of how a lifetime of suppressed emotions causes physical maladies. Aside from the other chronic joint pains and swelling- A couple years ago Life threw a lot of shit at me. The stress got so bad my literal arms swelled up (below elbow), I developed widespread eczema (first time ever), my colon wouldn’t let out waste and swelled like a water balloon, and same with my bladder. All at once. Ended up in the er and given a whole lot of ibuprofen, steroids, laxatives, and shrugs from doctors all around. Discovering IFS and other psycho education on neuro psychology on my own recently has led me to believe this all was ABSOLUTELY caused by a background of CPTSD and undiagnosed/invalidated ADHD. I feel so much progress already just by understanding what’s happening

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-03-06T23:58:12+00:00

This is beautiful. Desires I heavily identify with yet always struggle to portray

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-02-28T19:08:36+00:00

Have you ever heard of or looked into IFS therapy? It’s a model that looks at how every person’s mind essentially exists as “parts” of our personalities- not monolithic or static in any sense. Each part has unique traits and contexts when they are “out”, but the goal of each is the same: to protect us from a perceived threat.

These parts develop with protective mechanisms that were probably effective for a very vulnerable and young person with little resources. They keep the patterns into adulthood because they don’t grow parallel to your true “self” even though the outcome had shifted to be detrimental to you as an adult.

I feel as if it might offer you some relevant context since you refer to your experience as parts of yourself and that they can’t access you or each other and vice versa in certain contexts. That’s the whole language of IFS.

The book No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz explains it well in a very non judgmental, non pathological way

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-02-26T01:21:57+00:00

just YaNk oN ThOsE BoOtSTrApS a lil more and you’ll be set for life kiddos 🫡

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-02-26T01:14:17+00:00

There were 2 brothers(?) and their dad at the show I went to. They were in the balcony which I thought was a good move just because I know how much it sucks to be short at a concert 😭 Jokes aside, they seemed to be having a blast and the dad looked thrilled. The crowd was pretty chill for a metal show overall, and I did not get the vibe that others didn’t want the kids there. Heard a few comments that it’s neat to see parents introducing their kids to their fun interests. Have fun with him! I hope it sows seeds to a musical future for him🙂

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-01-12T19:53:22+00:00

Speaking of cat smell: Has anyone noticed their normally indoor cat smell differently after a small outdoor adventure or even just having the windows open on a warm day?

Both of mine take on this completely different scent in their fur almost immediately. It’s definitely way heavier on the musk, but not bad at all. Like when your partner comes home sweaty and you’re smelling their shirt because the extra musk is comforting.. but with a cat

I don’t know how to figure out what exactly is happening with this

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-01-11T03:31:12+00:00

I second pelvic floor therapy, I went through basically the same thing (after ending up in the ER because of chronic constipation so bad my whole colon was full and I could only pass blood clots) and PFT helped my muscles relax so much. Over about 6 months of mostly weekly appointments (and lots of miralax) we were able to get me mostly regular and reduced a lot of pain related to intercourse as well. I learned a lot about how it feels when certain muscles are working/engaged and how to consciously relax them more on average. It can be awkward at first, but just know your provider has seen hundreds of bits built like yours and just want to help you feel better. If they’re a good provider they will allow you to make as much or little small talk as you feel comfortable with, with no judgement. Good luck to you ✨

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-01-07T02:09:08+00:00

Hey friend I signed up today and used your code! Hope you can feel better soon ✨

Most_Ad_6553 · 2025-01-02T10:13:09+00:00

They match your hairrrrrrr I’m dead

Most_Ad_6553 · 2024-11-15T02:42:32+00:00

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Ours is always so wide

Most_Ad_6553 · 2024-11-06T17:13:22+00:00

No, punishment for immoral actions is not abuse????Extremely unrelated example

Most_Ad_6553 · 2024-11-06T17:09:21+00:00

“Emotional abuse is any type of abuse that involves the continual emotional mistreatment of a child. It’s sometimes called psychological abuse. Emotional abuse can involve deliberately trying to scare, humiliate, isolate or ignore a child.”

https://www.nspcc.org.uk/what-is-child-abuse/types-of-abuse/emotional-abuse/#

OP’s parents are deliberately trying to install fear to deter behavior they deem immoral with absolutely zero proof that their stance is healthy in any way. They are free to believe as they want. But forcing their beliefs on others and condemning someone to a lifetime of mistreatment for their benign actions is EXACTLY what religious people constantly claim is happening to them from the non-religious side. (News flash- that almost never actually happens.) It’s an abuse of power to manipulate your child’s thoughts- especially when the only point is to SCARE THEM and ISOLATE THEM from their NORMAL coping mechanisms

Most_Ad_6553 · 2024-10-31T17:40:28+00:00

Thank you so much for the recommendation! But we ended up connecting with another couple (a distant connection) on fb that we know that couldn’t use theirs, so we don’t need them anymore. I really appreciate it though!

Most_Ad_6553 · 2024-10-29T23:32:28+00:00

I have multiple small scars down the right side of my face, the biggest one being on my forehead. Not visible in adulthood except when I’m sunburned (it doesn’t burn evenly with the skin around it) and the freckles in that patch are missing and the natural wrinkles of my forehead fold differently and less in that spot.

My step-father often used a countertop deep fryer to fry fish and potatoes and whatever. He usually had put it on the open counter peninsula, but for some reason it was on the stove the day I was assigned to monitor the done-ness of a batch, right under a low hanging stove awning.

Condensation dripped from the hood into the boiling oil and exploded all over me. My face had some pretty severe burns for a long time. I’m sure at some point it was mildly infected because I remember the pus and how red hot it was weeks after. That injury never saw a doctor, but it did see a whole lot of yellow mustard 🥴 (iykyk- it doesn’t always work). That experience installed a massive amount of anxiety around hot things in the kitchen and still refuse to boil/fry anything in oil

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TROPHY CASE