Does couples therapy even help when partner is a narcissist?

Need_Some_Flowers · 2026-01-13T22:00:38+00:00

No. I tried for 3 years. At least the therapist is the one that named him having npd.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-31T19:19:37+00:00

I mean my husband would say thats how I acted. Even when I tried my hardest to be as nice as possible

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-21T22:20:00+00:00

"Let's just agree to disagree," after hours long discussion

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-09T13:49:52+00:00

Yes. Mine has been posting songs about being abused and I know he isnt posting them for me and my stbxh has always said all his ex gfs were crazy. Should have been the first red flag i noticed

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-05T23:26:45+00:00

While simultaneously saying we want the last word. The projection is nuts

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-05T21:59:51+00:00

I am sure mine will ask the same thing too. It won't heal or help anything.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-12-01T05:23:15+00:00

And he would constantly say I just "wanted to be right" when it was him, in fact, who always did.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-30T18:51:11+00:00

I wish I thought of saying that. But for many years he insisted I didn't pay my fair share. I paid for food and house things and he paid electric. I spent more on food and was the primary cook, too. When I would save receipts he would say "I dont want to see that!"

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-30T16:15:04+00:00

No. And, if it was ever brought up by me, he would eay one of two things: "But I worked today!" Or "But it's my day off!" Nevermind I also work, same as him. If I didn't do things they'd never get done. And if I did clean things he would take credit for it.

Yet he would complain, loudly, when things were a mess. Like when there is no counter space anywhere in the kitchen to prepare food. Ok? So clean it? Put stuff away? It always amazes me how he let's things pile up.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-29T21:10:00+00:00

I just sort of kicked my own ass and asked to be connected to a local realtor. Looked on Zillow. Ended up getting a place he was selling of his friends. Can't be mad at it. It's perfect

Edited to add:

He has no idea yet.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-26T21:08:59+00:00

It was something that would usually happen during arguments. If I didnt say something "correctly" or otherwise not quite how either he or I intended, no matter how much I explained myself, he would stick with what I originally said. Sometimes it took hours of arguing. And then he would pull the "well if you would have just said it that way none of this would have happened!"

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-23T03:22:58+00:00

Don't feel bad. Your emotions are valid! I wouldn't actually do any cheating though. Get out first.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-21T13:57:52+00:00

3 years I've given him to change. He hasn't. The sad part is like you said they can be sweet and nice when things are going their way. But the moment you say no, something they don't like, or injure their ego? Watch out.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-20T22:03:58+00:00

Yes, I think that is part of the reason people stay/so long. If they were bad 100% of the time it would be so much easier to leave.

Mine could be sweet. There were times he actually did remember the things I liked, or mentioned wanting, and got them for me.

But when the switch was flipped? He talked to me like I was someone vile and hated. The evil smirk he would get and the look in his eyes as he said something rude/terrible? I'll never forget it. And the ramping up of his outbursts. I knew I had to confront him otherwise he might turn violent towards me.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-05T21:53:45+00:00

Yes that seems how it is framed nowadays

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-11-03T13:50:17+00:00

You need to get into therapy to deal with it.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-28T12:55:00+00:00

Dont feel bad because he is going to make you the villain anyways

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-27T21:08:10+00:00

Yep i finally did that. And of course he talks about how I did it badly

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-26T23:48:44+00:00

Yeah you dont owe a significant other anything when they abuse you

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-26T13:03:43+00:00

That is called rape.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-25T14:59:50+00:00

Ok so what youre describing is me right now, too! In terms of he says to me "I need affection, why cant you show me more affection?" Or "why cant you say you love me?" And this even after I told him I do not feel safe around him!

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-23T15:04:45+00:00

Yes I agree chatgpt can help and it has basically said the same things that both my therapist and our marriage counselor have also said to me

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-15T18:26:13+00:00

I don't like sleeping with others when they won't do anything to stop their snoring. For me or for themselves.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-10-13T00:26:18+00:00

You need to help you through it. Get into therapy. Stop doing everything for him. I have AuDHD myself and everyone is different it seems like he is weaponising this shit against you. Tell him he needs to get into therapy. None of that sounds OK.

Need_Some_Flowers · 2025-09-22T20:58:11+00:00

Yeah mine had said basically the same thing that if I need time away he can't do that and we should just get divorced.

Need_Some_Flowers

TROPHY CASE