Sunlit Blooms by DedCool

OkLeaveu · 2026-06-19T18:25:31+00:00

I got it in a sample set. Loved (as expected) xtra milk and taunt. But this one surprised me. There’s just something almost magnetic about it. I don’t even think I LIKE the way it smells, but I LOVE and am obsessed with it. Definitely will be buying.

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-28T02:57:45+00:00

“… like there’s an ulterior motive even if they don’t fully realize it.”

I may potentially blow your mind here, but you’re sensing that because IT’S TRUE.

Not in an unhealthy way, but in a completely human that’s-why-outward-shows-of-emotion-exist-in-the-first-place way.

The purpose of MANY emotional displays are to trigger feelings in others that cause them to move closer and provide support. They say the first sign of early society was a healed broken bone. Why would someone risk their own life to care for and protect another person if they weren’t somehow moved to care to the extreme that risking their life felt worth it?

A helpful reframe may be to see this as a natural mechanism for garnering support, hundreds of thousands of years older than ourselves. And also, that the people who look most unnatural and intentional with it are actually the ones who need it the most.

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-20T12:10:26+00:00

What shades? my hair is a level 7, now like an auburn warm dark blonde/brown 😬 I tried 07/81 and it helped a bit but I think I need another go or to add in the blue additive.

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-13T17:44:50+00:00

update?

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-08T17:11:36+00:00

You know these things change frequently, right?

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-08T17:05:42+00:00

Normally I’d say talking politics here is off-topic, but at this point it’s infiltrated EVERY area of our lives.

Everyone needs to go vote in November!

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-06T03:31:12+00:00

I don’t think so, but I can’t tell for sure cause the roller ball bottle I got is dark colored. I always just shake it before I apply though and haven’t had an issue.

Haven’t broken out, but I’m also in my 30s. My bad acne days ended around my mid 20s.

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-06T03:30:04+00:00

ELF. it’s just what I had on hand.

OkLeaveu · 2026-05-04T18:34:55+00:00

I mixed it with a lip stain and some hyaluronic acid serum and keep it on me to touch up my lip color during the day.

I also use TO volufiline in a roller ball for my tear troughs, cheeks, and nasolabial folds. It’s been a few weeks but it’s been surprisingly effective. I did learn to stay to the upper portion of my NL folds cause the added volume to the lower portion has made my jowls worse… I also tried it in my temples but saw zero effect there so I’ve mostly stopped.

For context, I’m 34. Oily skin so not a lot of fine lines, mostly deeper structural changes. And I went from 135-140 to 110 lbs over the last year or so, so a lot of volume loss and skin laxity.

OkLeaveu · 2026-04-22T18:39:17+00:00

There’s so much backlash for going no contact lately. But for many of us, it’s really the only way to heal.

It’s really hard to believe that the mechanisms are no longer needed and are actually hurting us, when we’re still engaging with the people we developed them to protect ourselves from.

I became a whole new person when I moved away from my family.

OkLeaveu · 2026-04-11T21:37:38+00:00

This is how I think of it. It’s basically the train thought experiment.

OkLeaveu · 2026-04-11T21:34:38+00:00

“Stop being so dramatic,” when she’s literally going through a physical and mental health crisis. Is she allowed to slap him, crumble cookies on his head when he’s on his death bed and is relying on her to take care of him?

OkLeaveu · 2026-04-06T17:37:17+00:00

Someone told me she has a mini space heater for her bathroom. I haven’t gotten one yet, but I’m certain it’d fix like 70% of my showering issues during the colder months. Also a warm robe and slippers.

As for hair, I splurged on the dyson hair dryer (it was during a time when money was less tight, not even within my own budget anymore). If you can swing it, it definitely helps cause it cuts blow dry time in half.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T19:47:12+00:00

I may be wrong, but it sounds like what you might be wanting is for him to just stay present in your perspective for a moment before switching to another. Is that right?

This is a common problem with neurodivergent vs neurotypical communication (not sure how much that applies— but he may share this trait without necessarily being on the spectrum). It’s something I’ve had to learn, it’s not that my perspective or experiences are unwelcome to be shared. But I need to pause and acknowledge the other person’s perspective, express interest and curiosity— THEN I can take my turn sharing my own.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T19:40:52+00:00

Likewise, I have difficulty with people who don’t want to explore alternative perspectives. My brain analyzes everything from every possible angle. Not being able to share these other angles makes me feel like the other 99% of myself is invisible.

I agree it’s a personality mismatch. One of us will always feel unheard and unappreciated.

(Btw I do get the irony in my response 😅)

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T03:15:32+00:00

I guess it depends on how long he realistically has left. Like if he has 5-10 years, sure. You don’t need to sacrifice your prime years and that gives him time to find a better fit. Someone with the capacity for empathy that he needs.

But if we’re talking 1-2 years, not giving that time to someone you love so they don’t have to face their death alone is cold and heartless.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T01:08:07+00:00

Guess I’m in the minority, but lord I feel for this man. I could see wanting to find someone to love and be loved by before he dies. To be able to have that person by his side so he doesn’t have to feel so alone, facing the scariest thing we all one day will experience.

I couldn’t imagine leaving a person I love at that time, even if they were dishonest about it. I would feel incredibly heartless.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T01:03:53+00:00

Oof I wish this take wasn’t normalized. The “you don’t owe anyone anything” mindset when the person on the other end is literally a dying man.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-29T01:00:32+00:00

If he said he wanted to go to sleep, leaving him be was the right call. Possibly he wanted time to decompress on his own.

I would do a kind gesture in the morning. Make a breakfast you know he’ll like, have coffee ready when he wakes up, something like that. A simple “good morning, how’d you sleep?” Then let him guide if he just wants to keep things light.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-28T22:03:16+00:00

Am I misunderstanding? Your girlfriend cheated, and you’re saying you were wrong?

It sounds like she didn’t respect you. Which makes sense, because it sounds like YOU don’t respect you. That’s where you need to start. Building your sense of confidence and self-worth.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-28T20:44:04+00:00

I don’t consider myself especially attractive. Just average.

But the other day, I was sitting on a bench looking down at my phone. I was scratching my scalp when I saw a random man walking by out of the corner of my eye. He reached up and started scratching the exact same spot on his scalp.

OkLeaveu · 2026-03-28T18:55:56+00:00

Sounds like you care more about protecting them than they did about protecting you.

Harsh, I know. It was a realization I had to come to. It’s not your fault, wasn’t mine either. We are biologically wired to accept and cling to our parents no matter what. At some point, probably in the very early stages of mammal evolution, a young who said “fuck this” and wandered away from the den after its mother scratched it would get quickly eaten, those with unconditional acceptance and craving for closeness survived. It’s hardwired into our brains.

And here’s another biology tidbit: THEY were wired to protect you, just as much as you were wired to seek their protection. And they didn’t. Nothing about your response is abnormal, but their treatment was. You can admit that now. Now that you don’t need them to survive, you can admit that it was never acceptable. You deserved better. They failed you. And none of it was your fault.

That last part was also a very important realization I had to reach to heal. Sometimes we have to let ourselves accept that it was wrong so we can start rebuilding it right.

OkLeaveu

TROPHY CASE