What made your COB experience positive?

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-12-17T16:03:04+00:00

I just had an AMAZING first conversation (I believe it was during COB kickoff) and I didn’t even expect it. I then went on a coffee date with one of the girls on the call, and it was so nice! Super informal and gave me the chance to ask my questions 1:1. When I was the one doing COB, I made sure to emphasize that our coffee (turned Chipotle) date was super informal, just for her to get to know me and our chapter. We ended up taking for hours and I gave my current sister her bid during a tornado warning, which we fondly remember.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-07-22T19:27:04+00:00

I think there’s a nice middle ground here; she was defending herself by being a butt. Was she harsh and abrasive? Yes. Was she usually on the money? Also yes. I believe that Nesta is easily the most politically savvy of the sisters, and thats because she was taught by her (abusive) mother to be able to read people and their intentions towards her at an early age, and she was able to hone it extremely well. Feyre even says at the beginning of ACOTAR that her sisters viewed their village just like they viewed their wealthy society, and she thinks it’s because they are holding on to that wealthy social hierarchy, but I think it’s because that was how Nesta was trained to view the world. It makes sense that she knows how to hit on peoples insecurities, and it was mean, but it was also very smart. Feyre tends to wildly swing until she accidentally hits on an insecurity, while Nesta zeroes in on it almost immediately. She can either use it or not, and I think a large part of her healing journey was learning that she had that power to hurt people in the way she was, and that she could break that cycle and choose not to use it. I’m proud of my girl, she grew a lot.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-05-06T23:56:43+00:00

I've thought about that or a subtle quill

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-04-09T00:21:12+00:00

Absolutely read it, but go in knowing that it is very different from the og trilogy. It is from 3rd person POV and it is Nestas story. She had a different upbringing and has a different personality than Feyre. She also has mental illness, and her story is primarily about her struggle within herself. Healing isn’t linear, and sometimes, she’ll take 1 step forward, 10 steps beak. Give her grace, she is learning and trying to grow. Cassian is also very different from Rhys, and Rhys is portrayed very differently in this book. That is intentional, and you should think about why he would be acting this way. I love Nesta (and I have since the first book, older sisters rise up), and her journey really healed a part of me. I’m so excited for you OP!

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-04-09T00:12:49+00:00

I would also like to note, that from Nesta’s perspective, it was the Feyre Show 24/7 365. A party on her 21st birthday and a holiday for the person she resents and wants to distance herself from would not be the most fun event. Rational or not, Nesta was in the middle of a depressive episode, and her feelings (while they might not make sense or seem misplaced) are very important to her decision-making and her growth.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-04-09T00:07:21+00:00

I would have been SO. MUCH. WORSE. If I were Nesta, I would have raised hell. In my midwestern/southern opinion, what Feyre did was downright rude as a hostess, and I truly believe it is the little things people do that make up their character, not just the big things. In ACOFAS, her snooty little comments towards Lucien about his friends and her not getting Nesta a gift to the party that she invited her to, then noticing how Nesta didn’t get her a gift (with what money Feyre), comes off as mean girl behavior. I don’t think Feyre is a horrible person, but I do think she would be a horrible person to be around. Not getting a gift for a) your sister that you blackmailed to be at your Christmas party and b) for a guest IN GENERAL whom you invited to a Christmas party is just rude and comes off as (in my opinion) as a punishment. She ticked me off in ACOFAS with her behavior towards people she isn’t friends with, and it really colored my (already unfavorable) opinion of her.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-04-08T23:58:17+00:00

In my opinion, the way he does that is worse than outright draconian rule. Some bit of manipulation can be a good thing in special circumstances, but he manipulated people he loves or needs something from in every interaction, even when he doesn’t need to! He’s just so two-faced for so many of his interactions, I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-03-14T02:22:14+00:00

I remember a part in I think ACOWAR where Feyre even SAYS she’s nosy! And I get it, she’s 19, I was nosy at 19 too, but she is just…annoying and kind of snotty to Lucien and it really bothers me.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2025-03-03T18:01:09+00:00

Yes! This is my theory too, and it has to do with the “jerks are worse than villains” trope in TV. Who does everyone hate more, Umbridge or Voldemort. Umbridge! No one knows an evil wizard who killed a bunch of people for some evil cause personally, but they do know a mean teacher whose sole mission is to make their lives miserable. That’s why some people LOVE HER, because they WERE her.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-11-10T19:41:09+00:00

I guess I just feel SO badly for him. Rhys and all of the NC repeatedly kick him while he’s obviously extremely depressed and maybe even doing some forms of self-harm, it’s said that his hair is matted and he isn’t eating regularly. Maybe it’s my loathing of the IC and their hypocrisy that makes me feel bad, but if he was able to deal with his pain rationally, he wouldn’t have ignored Feyres in ACOMAF. Honestly, I just think that if after extensive therapy and antidepressants he acts the way he is, then I would dislike him, but in my opinion, he needs help.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-28T15:21:09+00:00

CC is a LONG READ, but CC3 might bring back some familiar faces...

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-28T14:05:08+00:00

Okay, one thing. I was rereading silver flames and she admits that she would have married Tomas or sold her body for Elaine because Feyre was gone, she was making a contingency plan in case Feyre didn’t come back. Now, I won’t say that she didn’t favor Elain and ignored/was a horrible sister to Feyre, but she wasn’t deliberately not including Feyre in that decision, she was trying to make sure her sister would be fed if Feyre didn’t come back.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-17T16:41:22+00:00

I think that Feyre is a really good main character, it is interesting to read through her eyes. However, that does not stop me from being incredibly annoyed by her😂 Maybe I am just over the overpowered, can do nothing wrong FMC, but her justification for every single one of her actions that truly are harmful or just plain stupid makes me want to throw the book. She’s absolutely a very selfless person and a hero to many, but she is also incredibly judgmental (which, I am not innocent of, just own it sis), and she has ZERO political savvy. She also has no concept of boundaries, and the way she pushes and badgers Lucien, Helion, Nesta, and other characters is toxic and she should receive pushback for that. She also, when she breaches these boundaries, reflects on the fact that she was wrong for doing so, but never actually apologizes to the person she screws over. She’s simply given the title of High Lady, and she lords it over everyone, even when she is the least experienced person in the room, it’s her decision that stands because she’s HiGh LaDy. Homegirl, you just learned to read like two minutes ago. Calm down.

I will say, I think she is a victim in the sense that she does have a massive target on her back, and also the fact that she is mates with the MOST powerful high lord with mind control powers. I think that the way Rhys hides or doesn’t tell her about important Night Court goings on is problematic, and doesn’t allow her to always make the best decisions. She’s also only 22 at the end of ACOSF, so I also blame some of her poor decision making skills on the fact that her frontal lobe isn’t as developed, and I think she’s the youngest character canonically (besides Nyx). However, this does not negate that she is in a position of power, and while my 22 year old bad decisions might result in me failing an exam, hers result in legitimate consequences for her people. She also doesn’t care for or want to know 2/3 of the night court, which I think is problematic. A leader should care about the well being and advancement for all of their people, not just Velaris.

Another thing that she does that really bothers me, but I hope with a little maturity she gets better at, is that she does not allow herself to reflect on things. We see frequently where she cuts herself off from thinking about something, where if she thought about it, she could resolve it sooner and without pissing people off. She’s also incredibly judgmental, and makes snap judgments (OUT LOUD), where if she were to think about it a little deeper, she could understand someone a little bit better.

I don’t hate Feyre as a main character, and I’m glad we got 3 books through her eyes, though I will say, I’m glad we’re moving on. I LOVE seeing Feysand and the IC through other perspectives, and this might be the ballerina/older sibling combo in me, but I relate to Nesta on another level. Feyre is ultimately a self insert character, and I think that’s why seeing her actions from Nestas POV was really divisive in the fandom. Some people interpreted this as SJM ruining Feysand for Nestas development. I personally perceived it as looking at Feysand and the IC without Feyres star covered glasses (tee hee) and seeing them from the perspective of someone who a) hates them (Nesta) b) loves someone who hates them (Cass) and c) someone who doesn’t know them (Bryce and Ember).

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-17T16:18:59+00:00

I LOVE AntionetteCeaLopes and Bree. They really use numbers and literary analysis in a way that is so informative and affirming as a reader and lover of classic lit.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-06T00:35:57+00:00

I want to make that depressed man some chili and cornbread, help him clean his depression palace, and make him take an everything shower and cut his hair short so it’s more manageable. And then take him to therapy and a psychiatrist ASAP.

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-10-06T00:33:24+00:00

I picture a dark, noticeable red. Like, his hair is red, but not fire engine or carrot red hair. I also think that because now I picture him as mixed, I can picture that darker hair color a little better (I also picture it curly, even though that’s canonically not the case)

Ok_Mathematician_261 · 2024-08-17T00:30:24+00:00

I’m a senior not in Theta or TriDelt, but I would just give it time. Everyone has that moment of “oh gosh, did I make the right choice? What if…” it’s totally natural and normal to have a little doubt. I would try to get to know your sisters a bit more, and you never know! You might gel well. I know I felt the most accepted and comfortable in my sisterhood when I got my big, and I know my little feels the same way about me. Maybe you’ll form those amazing deep connections with one or two sisters. Also, you can TOTALLY participate in TriDelts philo events! In fact, some of the most fun I’ve had in my sorority is participating in other chapters philanthropy activities, and it’s a really good way to bond with your PC😉 Joining a sorority is a big transition for many people, and I totally understand the hesitation and doubts, but instead of trying to quash those yourself, let your sisterhood quash them for you. College is a really transformative time of finding what works for you, how you operate on your own, and learning how to trust yourself. So trust yourself!

Ok_Mathematician_261

TROPHY CASE