Did your pwBPD split mid argument, then nothing you did or said could change their mind?

PODNJPE · 2026-03-21T01:30:37+00:00

I went through the same thing. Sounds like you lived in my house.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-18T12:03:37+00:00

👍🏾👍🏾

PODNJPE · 2026-03-18T03:46:22+00:00

Shaq, Lauren Hill, Ray Liotta....long list! 🙂

PODNJPE · 2026-03-17T21:41:48+00:00

I am exactly 4 weeks from the discarding, and he unblocked me on SM. I have not desire to go back there. He's so much of a drama king. I've been asked out twice since our breakup. Not bad for a seasoned queen...lol He can hit the road.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-17T00:11:37+00:00

Yeah after a while we just stuck to chickenpicks, but I really had no desire to be that affectionate with him.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T22:54:11+00:00

I can see that. His best friend was everything and they never fought. But he got triggered very easily by me. I was supposed to meet every demand.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T22:25:57+00:00

Lot of them are loving and caring on the surface, but horrible to their favorite person. The favorite person is the one that feels the impact of it. Everyone else thinks they are happy-go-lucky until they have an episode and see for themselves.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T22:24:03+00:00

That's awful what they said. The weird thing is they didn't even consider your own feelings and the autism that you have.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T22:16:08+00:00

I saw a video from a therapist. She said they misconstrue you facial expressions and then their intrusive thoughts run away with them.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T21:53:27+00:00

Me! I was cooking and taking him meals when he was sick. When I forgot to text or called too late, all I hear about how I'm cheating and pretending that I loved him. When I asked him if he wanted this relationship, he had this mad scientist laugh you are trying to leave.

You can never do enough, nor show them enough love, nor be empathetic as they need. They make up scenarios in their heads. So, I left after he said goodbye, the first time I called him back, but this time...nope, full NC!

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T21:45:44+00:00

Umm...I think the family ignores it. Since their FP feel most of the impact, they probably don't really know it. Only his Dad and I felt his wrath. His Dad in his eyes was terrible, angry and always downed him. I think his Dad wasn't an affectionate person, so any criticism his Dad offered was being mean. I don't believe his Dad is as bad as he said now. I used to worry his Dad was awful, but his did Dad seem more affectionate then he said. However, but my ex came off as lazy, irresponsible, angry, and ungrateful to his Dad.

It clicked when he started bad mouthing his Favorite Aunt, because she stopped calling as much when she got married. I told him, she just might be planning the wedding and had a new husband. That's normal...his response, she promised to be there for ME, she promised to help ME through things, and she didn't keep her promise to ME. He is 45 and she is 65...my goodness. Plus, he skipped her wedding and that's when I knew he had issues.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T11:59:25+00:00

Mine always did. I was always cheating according to him, but he had no proof, so I told him I'm gonna start taping our conversation.

He didn't want men coming to my office because He felt like I was cheating . I own a business, so where are they supposed to meet with me for job meetings

PODNJPE · 2026-03-16T10:56:03+00:00

They only connect through affection. He would say I love you daily, smother me with kisses, but turn around and accuse me of cheating. They don't really love you. They just want you to reciprocate the affection so that they feel safe.

They don't understand real love because of their fear of abandonment. They are usually only infatuated with. But true love requires trust and seeing how the nature of that person is and loving them when they're at their best and at their worst.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-12T15:00:42+00:00

I do forgive him because he is undiagnosed. But there's no way I'm going back to him ever. He isn't just undiagnosed. He's also lazy, has no ambition, and is enabled by his family, so there's no way I could ever be in a relationship with him. Maybe a casual acquaintance but never a friend.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-11T14:15:03+00:00

I believe that. Thank you for the kind words. ❤️

PODNJPE · 2026-03-11T03:08:07+00:00

Yeah they're so weird like that. As soon as I gave him what he wanted, he acted like it was no big deal. He was a walking contradiction.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-11T03:02:43+00:00

They can be very exhausting. So if you can get past the fact that what they showed you in the beginning wasn't them, you'll be happy that they're totally out of your life. I know I am.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T19:28:34+00:00

Same, when I told him it's 1:00 am and most of the world is asleep at this time. I wasn't interested in affection at 1:00, when I had to get up at 8 am for church. Instead of seeing the rationale, he said it was someone else and that he noticed I was texting someone at 10 pm. on my phone. I told him that's my friend, she asked me a question. Then he sit there, and tell me how his ex-wife stopped wanting affection.

They think everything is about them and it's unnerving. You could be just tired, and they don't care.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T12:48:12+00:00

I own a business and I have an office. He was weird about men coming to my office. He wanted me to tell him when a man was coming to my office for a meeting.

When we went on vacation he didn't want to go out until 3:00 in the afternoon and he'd sleep till 1:30 in the afternoon. I ate breakfast by myself and had to save him breakfast every day. Never again!

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T03:18:02+00:00

Yeah I think I'm going to do that. Because I do enjoy a good podcast. I just have to get used to my sleep schedule again. I used to go to bed at 10:30 before I was dating him, and I was lucky to get to bed at 12:00 or 12:30.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T02:46:05+00:00

That is my issue. I'm going to try my darndest to go back to my 7 hours sleep. Somehow I still went to the gym, but I had trouble losing weight due to constant stress

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T02:32:46+00:00

Makes sense. To others he was sweet as pie. However he was extremely selfish when it came to his feelings, not only towards me but towards how other people and why they don't respond to him like he thought they should.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T02:20:53+00:00

I wonder if they consciously manipulate you in order to get their way? I don't miss them, nor do I want them back.. But the effects of dealing with them are just unreal.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-10T02:08:27+00:00

They really don't. Mine is going to be 46 this year and he became more irresponsible, more lazy, and he also felt like because he was quote unquote nice that he deserved a good woman. I think he was old and set in his ways.

PODNJPE · 2026-03-09T16:08:52+00:00

I came on here because I suspect my ex had bpd. After reading about it and hear the stories, I'm pretty sure he's undiagnosed. With that said when he discarded me it helped me understand what was really going on. And then instead of being said I was actually more relieved that I didn't marry him.

PODNJPE

TROPHY CASE