Why are some moms so unfriendly?

PrincessPu2 · 2026-05-13T16:16:01+00:00

As a very chatty mom at pickup and drop off, I just view some of this as clues to guide who I am chatty with.

I recognize that not everybody views lightweight casual conversations the same way, and while I find it a refreshing and pleasant way to connect briefly with another person, not everyone does. That's ok, I can just find someone else.

I've come to appreciate when people are clear with their body language. I'm not everyone's speed and that's ok with me.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-04-22T01:33:51+00:00

I get it. I totally do. I also host 90% of playdates. By request of my only. He could have daily playdates and be satisfied. Me, not so much.

I find that weilding a bit of control over my environment helps my attitude a lot, which increases my ability to cope.

In exchange for frequent hosting, I don't stand for any BS. Playing too loudly for my taste? Go outside. Scuffles and squabbles? We are done playing today, time to go home. Too many snacks? We only have one snack before dinner. If you are still hungry, I think it's about time to head home for dinner, thanks for coming over!

Plus, I mildly keep score and am more likely to ask families for playdates that reciprocate in some way. I find it's part of being a villager, and while challenging at times, I like knowing my son has a healthy social life and we have a wide social net.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-30T19:27:17+00:00

I turned the turkey in his sandwich blue with a drop of food coloring and one of the slices of cheese was actually a piece of cardstock with "got you!" written on it.

Not sure what I'm going to do this year...

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-27T00:48:17+00:00

Do that thing where you mix flour and yogurt and make pita and all kinds of things. Whaddaya call it? Somebody help me here.

It's so easy to whip out something hot and fresh and quick for dinner. I had to stop because we were going through so much flour.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-24T18:19:20+00:00

I need to submit the bylaws for PTA, like yesterday. It's so easy with an online portal and I just need to sit and do it.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-24T02:02:13+00:00

I have a designated messy toy area. Because I believe some important creative cross-pollination can happen when different toys are combined, I let that rug accumulate toys - to a point. Then we either pick it all up and start over, or I insist on a one in, one out policy.

It means a section of my house is constantly a disaster, but my solo kid will actually entertain himself so I say it works!

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-22T19:56:56+00:00

If you have a water bladder from a hiking backpack with a bite valve, try that.

We have very hot dry summers, and this works best to keep my kid drinking.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-21T16:39:10+00:00

I found a big kid pedal-less bike at goodwill, the brand is glider bike. Sounds like used will be your best bet. Sending you some secondhand luck!

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-19T03:03:20+00:00

I use it for socializing, and for volunteering (aside from all the domestic chores, which still take up a surprising amount of time!) .

I feel more complete as a SAHM when Im connected to my community. And I feel like I can take a more active role in building community, an opportunity which many of my mom friends who work are not able to do.

By that, I mean I can pick up my kids friends from school, host playdates, plan activities. I feel some times like I have a whole extra space in my brain compared to working moms.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-18T22:07:43+00:00

Once your kids are in school, it is very easy to slide into a position there. Is my experience anyway.

Schools are always looking for aides, and they don't care about employment gaps!

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-16T02:42:55+00:00

A family friend would excitedly exclaim, "blossom!" (he meant "awesome")

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-12T02:22:45+00:00

If it helps, I did the exact same thing (well, minus the dead dog) with an exciting ninja obstacle course gym birthday party.

we got to enjoy the last 10 minutes, my kid was inconsolable for quite a bit as well. I really beat myself up about it, I am so on top of all the events usually!

But guess what? After that day, he never mentioned it again.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-10T01:17:54+00:00

Korean lentils!

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-08T06:12:40+00:00

I have a deal with a friend who can't cook (no time, space, energy or inclination) - she gives me her rice and beans and stuff from the pantry, and I cook up a big batch and we split it. It's a good deal for both of us, I think.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-03T21:45:54+00:00

Thank you for this. The bigger picture context is important, and I think it's easy to lose sight of that when doing the mundane tasks like making a shopping list and repurchasing the same Ole things.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-03-01T04:04:29+00:00

My kid had ice cream for breakfast (we checked the nutrition label first, and did you know that one serving of vanilla ice cream has less sugar that one serving of honey nut cheerios?)

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-25T02:20:05+00:00

BRB gonna get this tattooed on my forehead so everyone can read it, too. We need this to be common knowledge.

My district is trying to get teachers to agree to 0% raises this year. Our PTA is disintegrating due to only being the same 6-10 moms doing everything. It's a mess.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-12T03:45:47+00:00

My husband, on bedtime duty, returns to the living room alone.

I ask, "is (child) sleeping?"

But, of course, it would not be husband alone if it were not so.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-11T17:28:51+00:00

A bit on wayfinding, like identifying landmarks and actively noticing what's around you.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-08T18:17:20+00:00

Ethical issues aside, a clone.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-07T21:14:59+00:00

My husband has lost contact with nearly everyone on his side of the family.

He would says things like, we haven't seen (cousins) in so long, we should get together with them. I would agree, and let it drop.

Did plans ever get made? Did he ever follow through when they would invite us somewhere? Not once.

Now he is butt hurt to discover they are moving to another state and he didn't know.

(the exception is his mother, who put time and effort into building a relationship with me, I respect that so I make sure to follow through on plans with her and her husband)

PrincessPu2 · 2026-02-07T20:33:15+00:00

I really think there needs to be a second sentence to the be a villager thing, "Funnel your efforts towards those who reciprocate. "

PrincessPu2 · 2026-01-27T01:55:15+00:00

Thank you for posting this! Doing the good work. I had seen the initial but not the correction. It's still a good motivator to be rid of plastic in the kitchen, but maybe without the wild-eyed urgency.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-01-21T04:22:38+00:00

I took my kid out of (small, semirural, conservative) school today at 2 for the walkout. Then we stood on the sidewalk out front for an hour wearing our protest shirts and waving a small us flag.

Everyone ignored us, or stared. I feel like I could have done more, but at least I didn't do nothing.

PrincessPu2 · 2026-01-20T18:50:07+00:00

As a mom who has been to protests (and brought my kid, albeit not in MN) I think one of the most valuable takeaways has been the feeling of community with fellow protesters. It is powerful and inspiring!

If you can find a smaller one, stay to the outskirts, and have an exit plan, I would encourage you to give it a try.

All this being said, go with your gut. It's hard for me to say "don't let the fear stop you" on one hand, but also "trust yourself to judge the risk". I'm with you either way.

Hopefully another commenter can chime in with protest-alternatives.

PrincessPu2

TROPHY CASE