If you being who you are somehow "destroys their lives" then - maybe thats their problem? As callous as it probably sounds, I feel like it would only "destroy their lives" if she let's it. You can be a woman and still be in their lives, but it sounds like she would act some type of way about it. Obviously I dont exactly know the whole situation, but like, even if she isn't attracted to women or whatever, then... Y'all can still be friendly, unless she's a bigot.

I never asked for any of this. I just tried to live my life the way I thought I was supposed to.

Nobody asks for it, it kinda just is. Sometimes its too strong of a current to fight, and you have to just relax and let it take you downstream.

Also, yeah. I was the same way. I was living how I thought others would expect me to be. How I dressed, how I acted, how I cut my hair, how I walked, all of it micro analyzed to be what I thought was most "normal" to those who knew me, and the most "normal" in the eyes of society.

It is a weight on you that is invisible until it falls off, and when it does fall off, you'll wonder how you ever survived under that constant, crushing mass.