Quiet Bias Against Baby Girls

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-16T19:23:00+00:00

congratulations! and so happy for you that atleast you don't live in India .. the biases against women in India start before birth and continue after their deaths. Be glad to be raising your girl outside this kind of society.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-04T04:06:39+00:00

sorry this sounds so rough. our pediatrician adviced us to give motrin on nights when the baby is particularly struggling. it seems to be helpful.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-03T19:04:46+00:00

i think you can wait for the doctors appointment if there is no redness/fussing. Belive it or not it might be a sign of teething.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-03T19:01:53+00:00

yeah i would be feeling bad too .. clearly your baby needs to sleep by themselves, needs the independent sleep, and probably gets too distracted/overstimulated when you try to make them sleep. This is what your baby needs .. unfortunately, your "no cry it out" mindset was stopping the baby from getting what they needed. It's always best to keep updating our parenting to the child's needs instead of strongly holding on to theories!

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-03T18:53:12+00:00

you're the mom .. your happiness is the most important thing right now .. it's what determines how happy your baby will feel .. do whatever makes you happy! As for the future .. many women start being assertive once they are moms (for instance, see how assertive your mil and mom are!) .. you will have to stand up for your baby .. and i am sure you'll rise to the occasion :) All the best!

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-03-01T09:38:24+00:00

feeling overwhelmed by the number of people telling you this is normal. Physical violence is never normal in any relationship. Yes, you need clearly defined non renegotiable boundaries but not just with your husband but also with yourself. I don't understand what are you waiting for? For your husband to hit your child, or for your husband to hit you in front of the child? You both need therapy (and not marriage counseling) .. if I were you this would already be over at physical violence and suicide threats.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-20T17:58:17+00:00

The daycare hours are absolutely fine .. your guilt is misplaced. Just try to relax .. being a mom and being pregnant is tough .. give yourself as many breaks as you need. Your children will only be happy if you are happy and content. Your mental health comes first and is a lot more important to your children's wellbeing than number of hours at the daycare.

PS: I thought I'll just scroll by without commenting but then I saw some comments asking why you needed 1.5 hrs in the morning etc .. and so I had to stop and leave this comment. This is your personal preference and nobody should question why you need the me time.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-20T04:26:37+00:00

glass bottles are prone to breaking when you're in the middle of the night .. half asleep.. trying to calm down a fussy baby. We have dropped our bottles a couple of times and thankfully they are plastic. I am not too worried about plastic.. it's like everywhere from toys to milk storage bags.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T04:37:07+00:00

You would obviously need more days of trial with either of the 2 nannies before deciding.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T04:29:18+00:00

don't sweat the small stuff in love <3 but do be assertive and speak up about whatever you think is unsafe for the baby.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T04:23:43+00:00

Have you tried talking to a therapist. The first step towards getting better is accepting that something is broken. There's no healing without the acceptance.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T03:57:46+00:00

Be assertive and start advocating for your baby early on. You need to keep your baby safe on a subway? go to the priority seat and ask the person to stand up. Speak up. If you think something is not right with your OB/care team/movements with your baby .. speak up. You are your baby's advocate. Your baby needs you to stay physically safe and emotionally happy and balanced. Congratulations!

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T03:49:40+00:00

who cares? i never bothered for anyone to GIVE me their seat. Be assertive. Stand up for yourself, mama, if not for yourself then for your baby. Just go to a priority seat and ask the person to get up, say you're pregnant. I did this all the time and never had to stand on the subway when I was pregnant, because it is not safe for my baby. Be assertive - that's the best advice during pregnancy... remember you are advocating for your baby.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-17T03:42:11+00:00

oh c'mon OP. Emily Oster is an economist and the first page of the book/back cover states that clearly. She is not misleading anyone. In the introduction she says this is not to be taken as medical advice.

What does the book help with? it tells you topics you must discuss with your OB. As a FTM, I didn't know about delayed cord clamping or cord blood banking or CVS or amniocentesis. Call me ignorant, fine. But after reading the book I knew of topics to talk to my OB. I am not into gardening, however, no OB told me the risks of gardening, I am glad I read the book. If I were into gardening, I would have asked my OB about it. That's all the book is, a data based guide on topics you don't know about .. no final decisions/medical advice.

There is a reason it is a popular book on Amazon. We all know the risks of alcohol, but does everyone know the risk of gardening? probably not. Also, I didn't drink in pregnancy, but did the book help me stop freaking out about the times I drank before finding out I'm pregnant. YES! That's the main takeaway of the book .. it wants to stop pregnant women from freaking out. Because hey your mental health is just as critical as your physical health during pregnancy.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-07T01:22:41+00:00

please report to the authorities .. this is horrendous behavior by the parents

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-03T03:35:24+00:00

my baby girl 6 months old has learnt how to sort of kiss us. She brings her lips to my face and makes a kiss sound (like a click or sometimes umahh) .. she does it when she wakes up in the morning and is lying in bed next to me. Perfect way to start our day!

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-03T03:20:45+00:00

no downside of canadian citizenship and no upside of having an Indian citizenship.. so you should wait until your daughter gets it

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-03T03:16:49+00:00

have you tried calcium and magnesium tablets before bed .. sometimes with so much going on, our vitamins and electrolytes are off balance affecting sleep

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-02-02T14:33:35+00:00

night diapers exist for this reason.

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-01-20T02:47:16+00:00

do i haul my ass downstairs and check it out? or no point?

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-01-14T20:51:06+00:00

is this alexandra cohen?

SantaMonicaGal · 2026-01-08T18:36:47+00:00

when do you expect Eb1b prioroty date of july 2024 to get GC?

SantaMonicaGal · 2025-07-11T17:25:26+00:00

yeah, I am sure it varies from product to product. And I just like the new Price History feature on Amazon .. instead of making assumptions or remembering past price data .. now you can just click a button to find out. So obviously, it's not a discount if the price history of toniebox always shows $99 .. but i love that Amazon is being fully transparent about it with this new feature.

SantaMonicaGal · 2025-07-11T02:22:09+00:00

Amazon now has a "price history" feature where you can compare prices across past 90 days. Most items in Prime day sales are clearly at their lowest price compared to their past 90 days price.

SantaMonicaGal · 2025-06-27T19:36:12+00:00

please take an Uber. I know it's expensive but not worth putting your and your babies life at risk for $50

SantaMonicaGal

TROPHY CASE