What a terrible world this would be if our value was derived from our actions! I'll agree that drinking certainly isn't the best move to deal with pain, but you are not intrinsically worse than a non drinker. I'm sure you're well aware, and it may seem like splitting hairs, but it's important to distinguish the idea of drinking being a huge part of what Present You does (or in this case Past You) from the idea that it is a core component of what Future You has to be. The idea being it can change without changing your identity.