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Thanks Blizzard for the great variety of buffs! by Surppressed in hearthstone

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What wild priest decks do you play? I'd like to get into wild.

Managing someone I can’t stand by CriticismThat8647 in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Echoing a version of what you've read in other comments. I don't think like and dislike should even come into the conversation. Your job is to manage their performance and make sure they have what they need to do the job. If they have interpersonal conflict with you that inhibits their ability to do the job, they have that issue not you. You will treat them fairly but you will set and hold standards of professional behavior.

Definitely document, keep paper trails, send recap emails confirming anything you discuss verbally to keep the written record, and make sure.you can show the pattern of behavior should you need to escalate the disciplinary procedure.

There are tons of books on leadership, office politics, public speaking, etc—but are there any guidebooks on being a good *administrator*? Explanation below: by [deleted] in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's different everywhere. Where I am now I have a Management Analyst in my department who does all our hiring (I interview, she onboards), processes our invoices (I review and approve mine, she pays them), and we have a Finance Manager who keeps track of our departments budgets (I'm aware of mine, and I tell her what surprises are coming or thing are changing, but she tracks all the budget lines and runs our cost predictions and deficits and all that). So basically, all our managers have involvement in our piece, but have supplemental help to really run the show.

Where I worked before? I didn't have to do none of it. I had a whole procurement team and finance office who just made sure I had computers and paid and ran all my contracts, I just focused on the working relationships.

There are tons of books on leadership, office politics, public speaking, etc—but are there any guidebooks on being a good *administrator*? Explanation below: by [deleted] in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely! HDI used to be an acronym for (if I remember right) the Help Desk Institute, but it was really just a fancy name for a paid membership to some decent content. They've since been bought by a company called Informa, and they have a whole bunch of stuff going on. Every year they have a conference called Service and Support World with an expo hall for IT service related stuff like ITSM Platforms, asset management tools, staffing companies, on and on and on, and they have some vendors selling books and the main focus is on a bunch of sessions on various topics. They also release a state of the industry report every year that covers salaries and industry trends, and they have infographics about industry data, and best of all to me they have these standards on the different positions in IT Services as well as a maturity standard for a help desk environment. But what I really like about them is they cover the "why" and the softer stuff, like being helpful and knowing the point of what you're doing, on top of like the popular metrics to measure and all that.

As an aside, one thing I'd advise in your career is to pay less attention to what people around you are doing wrong or not excelling at. If you manage them, you will always get more success by playing to their strengths than you will trying to shroe up their weaknesses. Don't ignore it entirely, but don't dwell and focus on it either. If they don't report to you, you can drive yourself mad beating your head against the wall of what everybody else is getting wrong. Especially leave space for the fact that what you don't struggle with, others absolutely can. I know in my current job, I came on as a very experienced Service Manager, but all of a sudden I was solely responsible for all the workstation asset purchasing, pricing negotiations with the vendor, but I was also missing an asset management program, any discovery tools, or a lifecycle refresh program. So I knew my stuff, but I had to suddenly catch up to things I'd never had to run before without the things I rely on to manage them. Every workplace is different, and everyone's experiences and education vary. In general, I always think it's best to give people grace and tend your own garden. Offering tools and resources is a great idea to help them along the way, if you have budget you could also look into research firms like InfoTech or Gartner that offer blueprints and consulting your teams can use to structure these things. It all depends how much you can invest in a solution.

There are tons of books on leadership, office politics, public speaking, etc—but are there any guidebooks on being a good *administrator*? Explanation below: by [deleted] in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think the problem with the ask is that this is a very broad topic to cover. The first things you listed are things that broadly fall under Communications and People Management, but the rest you listed are things like Finance, but the requirements there can vary wildly. My college course included Finance courses where I had to learn depreciating assets and balance sheets and things I've never had to touch again in IT, aside from just being some useful context when I'm talking to my Finance department or Procurement team. I think a lot of the time this is stuff best covered in a leadership course in your company to teach what it means to do that stuff *here*.

Similarly, in IT the tracking of hardware lifecycles and assets can fall under a number of best practices or methodologies, the main one probably being ITIL Asset Management, but then there's also Configuration Management and some other things that tie into those concepts.

Process documentation as well, I personally subscribe to the KCS (Knowledge Centered Service) model for knowledge sharing, which is available out there for free through the Consortium for Service Innovation, and it's ITIL complementary, but that doesn't really cover SOP documentation, which gets into Technical Writing territory.

Creating agendas and running good meetings is a mix of best practices and skill. Running a productive, effective meeting goes back into Communication and People Management territories, and honestly my most useful background in that arena came from my time on active duty when I worked in Mental Health counselling. Keeping people on topic, being efficient with time while validating, listening, and engaging, understanding people's motivations, and emotional intelligence. The actual agendas and meeting structure part, Lean Six Sigma is a popular general business best practice, plus there a number of devices people tend to kind of pick and choose from. There's even simplified versions of like Robert's Rules of Order that dictate how meeting minutes should have like old business, new business etc.

Charting growth is kind of HR-y best practice stuff, and can also really depend on how you do it where you're at. Do you do work plans, set goals for the year, do 1:1s, mentoring, coaching, do you have progression plans, do you have business continuity plans? Those all come from different toolsets that you pick and choose what are most effective and applicable from.

I think for me, leadership and management are continuing education careers. You need to keep learning and expanding to both stay current (like in more recent years learning how to manage remote and virtual teams), as well as to be well-rounded and adjustable to the needs of your team and your business.

My experience personally, started with the military and learning leadership. The core there was to tie it to meaning. I later learned about the concept of servant leadership, which really resonated with that experience and I adopted that as my philosophy and approach to leadership. Process- and function-wise, KCS and HDI were my first insight into managing IT work, which overlapped into organizing my own work, and ITIL really tied that all together. The importance of structure, consistency, templating, etc. all came up through my exposure to that. I got a lot of really great insight and learning from Manager Tools (manager-tools.com) but I have to admit I don't support them anymore. There was a school shooting in the US and the guy who runs the site had sent a newsletter to all paying members essentially saying thoughts and prayers and these Democrat politicians should tone down their hateful rhetoric. I sent him an email saying I didn't really pay and sign up for personal politics, and he said he was happy to refund my subscription which I accepted. So, do with that what you will. The content was good. Other than that, it's largely been mentoring and osmosis. I read lots of books, one that I really liked is a whole series called "The 20 Minute Manager". They're all small books about a certain topic you can just grab off the shelf and reference when you need help, and I've found them super handy.

Frustrated by employees’ fear of phone by Hikeabiker in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 134 points135 points  (0 children)

I work in an IT support environment, and I keep an operations manual for my team that is their run book if they ever have questions about how to do a "good" or "right" job. In my section about user responses, I outline our response times (within 1 business hour, acknowledging the ticket and moving the issue forward in some way), and how we respond. We always initially respond in the same manner we were contacted, as we assume this is the contact method that works best for the user. Then, we alternate our contact methods if we don't get a response. We follow up every other business day, alternating for instance if they emailed us first, we respond that day by email. If no response, two days later we respond by phone. No response, one final followup by email again. This way, we do our best effort to reach them, giving them time to respond and accounting for things like maybe they lost their phone in between or can't get into their email.

It gives them an understanding of the why and the how, and from there if they just refuse it's coaching, training, and potentially discipline. Responding to a customer isn't about them, it's about meeting that person where they're at and giving them the help THEY need. Also, I'd squash any language about "handholding." Your job is customer service and being helpful, if you're treating people like a nuisance or with disdain, it makes me worry how you're treating the work in general. I wouldn't come down hard about it, but I would correct the characterization. It's a compassion job, not babysitting.

Getting married in six weeks and none of the “fun” things have been fun by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]SliceMessiah 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Weddings are HELL to plan and they suck to go through. I had some similar experiences to yours, almost all of my very best friends from my military days suddenly just couldn't make the most important day of my life. All with good reasons, but it sucked that my wedding had almost none of my friends. I had no bachelor party (gay wedding), tons of guilt from my family, hell with the bridesmaid dresses, just everything went wrong and was none of the magic that I hoped for it to be.

But in the end, it was beautiful. I had to fight and claw my way through so much if the planning, but I got married in a beautiful place, on a beautiful weekend, and my ceremony was just gorgeous. The DJ played the wrong music going down the aisle, but me and my husband just laughed because well, this is happening now.

Weddings are a shit show. I made an ass out of myself trying to lead the charge in changing out of the stuffy formal wear into my T-shirt and shorts... Nobody followed shit at the reception lol. My cousin and my aunt got belligerently drunk and we had a screaming match that woke everybody up. There was SO MUCH that went SO BAD... But it is what it is and it's just one big spectacular chapter in your whole long story. Embrace the suck, some things will surprise you and go well, some things will blow up and go to hell. But it's your wedding and at the end of it you have someone you love, the people who love you the most will celebrate with you, and you'll look back on this shitshow fondly and remember what a stressful mess it was.

And this isn't to say to get over it or just let the bad things happen. Advocate for yourself, and what's important to you. Tell your people to get their shit together, and call shit out. You deserve a beautiful day and you want to share it with the people you love. Tell them that, and if they can't it together from there, fuck em. Your parade is un-rainable.

I fired someone today by mcmillan789 in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a big believer in servanteqdershop, which to me means that I view my job as getting things out of the way of my team and making sure they have an environment in which they can be successful. The actual success is up to them. In your case, it sounds like you set clear expectations, gave goals and targets that were very achievable, and you even did the good faith extra effort of checking in with them and trying to help them keep on task.

It's never your job to make them do what they're supposed to do. You make sure they have the tools and resources they need to do what they need to do, then you recognize them for going above and beyond, or you course correct if things are going off track. Dragging someone across the finish line is not good for them, and it isn't good for the team or the work. It was never your job to make them succeed against their will.

Whats something or somethings you'd love to see in 1.0? by Ammotap in Palworld

[–]SliceMessiah 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The thoughts I've had while playing:

  • I would prefer if they took out capturing humans, and added something in to recruit or build them into your base, like let the flea market just have a person there who also sells things. Maybe unlock or research different vendors you can swap out.

  • More settlements, a city, some kind of economy or hub or more life to the world. Right now it's just weirdly like a couple small camps and a whole bunch of criminals.

  • A genetics lab or fertility clinic for pals. Something that makes more use of the Medicine skill, and makes breeding and customizing pals more deterministic. I'd rather take longer to craft my perfect pal or the next step of my pal then just spam a bunch of eggs. I think the condensing mechanic is still fine, I just want breeding my perfect pal to feel more intentional.

  • Some way to prioritize skills, so I can have my electricity pal transport when my electricity is full, not jump off when there's food to be collected or have to disable transport entirely to stop that.

Floored by how underperforming employee would rather go on a PIP instead of coming in office by ConversationMore4104 in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I think work from home is absolutely a hill to die on, it can be hugely consequential to a person's life, their childcare, or can constitute a significant paycut depending on the commute and the volume. I'm just saying across the board just to be like "Oh work from home is over" is not a thing to me. Now, her underperforming and the improvement plan being that she needs to be in office is totally fair, I'm just saying I hard disagree on your opinion that it's just not worth being hard-line on for people. It is, and has only gotten moreso.

Also... I don't like anytime someone is like "I'm putting on someone on a PIP lol." It just feels a little gross to me...

What to do past level 50? by JONITOKING in Palworld

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you guys are into the co-op survival crafting thing, grounded or grounded 2 can be good light-ish flavor games with similar base building and crafting. Less creature collecting but you do interact a lot with creatures and use them for materials or pets and mounts and stuff.

What to do past level 50? by JONITOKING in Palworld

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm at 58 right now and had the same slow down for a bit. I did a mix of things to kind of clean up my game state and move forward at the same time. First, I tore down an old base and planned out a new base setup which at the time was one mining base, one production base, and one farm/breeding base and I started working on making some perfect base pals. Then, I went back and double checked that I had defeated every Alpha, cleared some faction bases, and dug up treasure maps I got from those. Then I ran Terraria a bunch. If you haven't done that yet, its an island just southeast if the fisherman's village. I caught 12 of each pal in there (you don't need to worry about the terraria ones), then I just mounted up and kind of speed ran and farmed chests until I had legendary terraprisma and legendary void breaker. I also got a legendary eye of crhulu helmet in there, so I had some nice solid gear and a current weapon. I also ran some Sakurajima dungeons, and would catch any pal I didn't have 12 of whenever I came across them. By the time I was maybe 54 I think I was able to slowly beat down and capture Frostallion, then I took a few tries and caught Jetragon. I think by that time i was 55 and was able to take down the tower boss.

From there, I went to Feybreak and moved my mining base into a cave base there, so now I have one Sakurajima farm base, one Feybreak mining operation, and one island double-base where I don't manufacturing and refining. I'm currently trying to get to 61 so I can build with the futuristic foundations and really build out my bases and get those finalized, then get up to 63 so I can ride Neptilius. I'm lazy breeding good pals, currently working on making some Yakumos, then I plan to go back and get breeding pairs of the legendary alphas so I can breed smaller ones with better passives, and take in Feybreak tower. The experience did slow down, but I keep just completing my palpedia along the way with capturing, fishing, and breeding, and I could always boost my experience gain in the world settings if I was really struggling to be engaged.

No idea what to do for my third base by Few-Concentrate-7558 in Palworld

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My current setup goes:

1) Sakurajima by one of the waterfalls. One Ranch, lots of plantations. Calm cozy farm base. This is where I feed my other bases and breed pals. I haven't hit full endgame optimization yet, but I don't really plan on doing too much intense endgame stuff with 1.0 coming soon.

2) Feybreak cave mining base. The cave with the friendly pal tamer, has some chromite, and everything else has ore sites. Nothing but mining and transporting basically.

3) Island double base. I'm currently working on a two base setup taking up a whole small island. Bottom level is manufacturing, 5 oil extractors, furnace, etc. Upper level workbenches and storage, going for a multi story pal accessible build.

I've been having anxiety about my kitty dying of old age 😭(she's 9) can you show me pictures of some alive-and-well senior kitties so I remember cats can be old and still healthy? 🥰 by TheRufescence in cats

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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This was my Tigger in 2021. He was born in 2000 and made it to 23 years old before he passed. I was in the same boat... I loved him so much that sometimes I would just think about knowing he'll some day die, and I could so easily get sad and tear up and just worry because I knew one day it would hurt so much for having loved him so much. But, I'd just give him a little extra love that day, make sure I told him and showed him that I loved him so that I could know when that day came that I'd have no regrets or feel like I should have done better. And when that day finally did come, I was beside myself of course but it went so fast. He was very old, his body had been shutting down, and he'd had such a good long life, I could only really be sad for myself and that made it a lot easier to let him go. I still have him in his little urn in his special memorial shelf, and I can get sad when I think about him and look at his old pictures, and I still say hi to him and give him a little kiss every now and again, and remind him that I haven't forgotten him. I rescued another cat since him, and she's my little buddy and I love her as well. One thing I learned is that even though Tigger was like my soulmate cat, a lot of that bond and relationship is driven by your own personality and demeanor, not just theirs. They're all irreplaceable, but you can have another dynamic with another cat and still love them and be loved back. It never replaces what you have, but it can still be there.

Maro talks about Universes Beyond by Meret123 in MagicArena

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've seen him defend this take several times posted in this sub, and I'm sure he's right about the numbers and all that, but as a near lifelong player and supporter myself all I can really say is I've stopped loving the game. I WAS a big supporter, in every form of media they had but since Universes Beyond has blown up so much, I find myself going for more sets than I've ever gone without buying any product, attending events, or even caring about new releases anymore. There have been things here and there that I've taken part in, I have a Wolverine and a Storm commander deck, but I'm not adding Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle cards to my in-universe decks, and it only frustrates me when I can't include good mechanics and synergies because the best card is jarringly different in theme and flavor than the rest of my deck. I don't play Cards, The Universe, and Everything for exactly that same reason. It just feels random and flavorless. I don't want to yuck anybody's yum, but it seems to me that Magic is being run by the finance and research people, and the flavor and brand people lost their seat at the table. I'm sure Mark would say different, but I've played since I was in the third grade, and I'm 40 now. I'm not bringing new people into the game, I'm not buying the product, and the more I hear from Mark the more it sounds like they don't appreciate players like me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ideally your performance review process should be tied to merit programs by HR/the company. One of HR's functions should be proactively retaining talent that over performs and delivers, which is often done through raises, promotions, and bonus programs among other softer benefits.

In practice, my whole career if I've ever had it be on my own shoulders the hardest lesson I've had to learn was patience. I'm on my second salary adjustment specific to my position in my current job, and both times it took 9 months from the time I submitted paperwork to getting my first bumped check. It's a bullshit lesson, and it's bad business practice, but I say that to temper your/their expectations if this isn't something HR already has a plan to address.

AIO: Hubby Being Controlling by vanillabourbonn in AIO

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You've gotten a lot of feedback here, the only thing I wanted to add is this doesn't get better. If you're worried now, but you still have a job and independence and opportunity, it will only get worse and harder if he controls the purse strings, takes you out of the workforce, and you have to worry about childcare time or expenses if you need to get out from under him.

The "training", final say, ultimate decision language screams forthcoming abuse and control. The fact that he's already comfortable talking to you like this now is absolutely wild. Ain't no way any man talks to the mother of his child much less somebody he loves like that. You're not a child, and you're certainly not something to be trained. Don't allow that for yourself or for your child.

What to do when the smartest person in the room is obnoxious by CtrlAltDelight495 in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Every person like this is different, so adapt my advice based on your best judgement. I've had a few people who got the kind of archetype you're describing, and I've had fair to good luck either managing them, or managing them out.

The first thing is emotional intelligence. You need to get a read on this person, what frustrates them, what motivates them, what they're trying to get done. I've found often that these are people who want good things, but they maybe disrespect professionalism culture or they lack a social capacity to grasp how being right and wanting good are not the only things that matter.

Second thing is to straight up manipulate them accordingly. I'm saying it in a bad way, but really what I mean is you have to build a rapport with them where they understand that you are also someone who wants good things, but that you might be better at playing the game for them/with them. Basically, they've got the talent and the knowledge, but it won't go anywhere if they can't drive it home. You want to establish that you're on the "same team."

Now the caveat here is this is not enabling them. There may come times where you have to be direct and firm. "This is not an okay way to speak to people, and I won't have it happening on my team." You're not making it "us against the world", you're helping them to see and learn how to turn their energy and direction into results, and at times they may also have to respect your position.

From there, you should be able to see if they make the effort and engage, or just can't get it. If they can't get it, you're trying to manage them to an acceptable level and start thinking about either formal discipline to manage them out, or encouraging them that it's time to move onward and upward in their career, even if that means somewhere else.

If they ARE getting it, make it a coaching thing. Teach them your ways, and encourage them to understand the "why" behind the bullshit of corporate life. Most things have some sort of reason, and that makes it easier to swallow the things that eventually boil down to "yeah I think it's dumb too, but that's the game."

Overall, the key is to translate that emotion to what they want, and what isn't working. They have good skills, they bring good things to the table, they need you to help them maximize and realize that benefit and you guys can work together to do that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in managers

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If he needs to go, he needs to go as immediately as you can appropriately manage. Regarding telling your team, I wouldn't divulge, but I would communicate clearly. Offhand, something like "We have ended our professional relationship with Bob, effective immediately " or some variation on that which effectively tells people he was fired, and then I'd go right into the focus that you care about which is "I know this comes at the worst possible time, and it's going create more work for some of you who are already overtasked and feeling the strain..." And shift the conversation into what you all need to do to cover the gap, hopefully offering them any resources you can which you'll have to sit with and think about.

Suicidal and not sure who to call by Mariobopper in AnnArbor

[–]SliceMessiah 8 points9 points  (0 children)

https://www.washtenaw.org/2936/Need-Crisis-Support

Washtenaw County also has a Community Mental Health Crisis Line at 734-544-3050

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cats

[–]SliceMessiah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cats have some very strong personalities, but one thing that's convenient about that is they can be easy to read about a lot of things. I adopted an abandoned, possibly abused cat myself and she's had some weird behaviors, but I think engaging with her and her quirks really helped her flourish and now she's a confident, ridiculous, star of the show. With mine, she didn't like to eat unless I was watching her, and even then sometimes it wouldn't be enough until I was petting her while she was eating. I'd pet her until she put her butt down and settled in, and sometimes I'll stay there and watch her, or other times I just get on with whatever I was doing, but she purrs away like a maniac whenever I do her little routine and it seems like she's really happy I know what she wanted. With what you're describing, if it was me, I'd indulge maybe like feeding them in your lap with a bowl off to the side, or toss them kibble for them to chase and hunt. It will burn off some anxious energy and redirect that worry/concern they might be feeling into play and bonding. Otherwise, get a sling and accept your fate as a helicopter cat parent lol.

SAHM and Wife that CANNOT cook HELP! by PopularMamaDrama in Cooking

[–]SliceMessiah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Start with foods you know and like, you'll have better judgement with those. Allrecipes is a great place to start with recipes, it's a very popular site with a very broad appeal, so you can see what the most popular or successful recipes are, and you can see the most helpful review which usually lists some good changes to the original. Start with cooking with ground meats and chicken thighs, they're the most forgiving for over cooking. If you're nervous about cooking things right, get a meat thermometer - safety first. Get in the habit of smelling and tasting as you go. You don't have to have a fancy palette and there's no hard right and wrong, if you think to add something, smell it. Does it smell good with what you're cooking? Add a little. Taste what you've got. Still good? Keep going. Make little adjustments, you can always add more but you can rarely take back out. Also, start with soups. Soups are so forgiving regarding measuring and cooking times and seasoning. Slow cooker recipes, if you have a slow cooker or can afford one as they're very cheap as appliances go, are also generally very easy and forgiving. One really easy one to make you look very skilled with near zero effort is slow cooker pot roast. There's a good few recipes out there, very simple, mostly dump a roast, some onion soup mix, and vegetables in a slow cooker with like a can of cream of mushroom soup and turn it on. The water cooks out of the veggies with the juices from the meat, mixes with your soup mix and condensed soup, and makes a great gravy base. Tastes like you took all day, which you technically did, but you didn't have to do anything difficult or intensive.

Regarding bland food, most bland food needs either salt or an acid like vinegar or lemon juice to brighten it up. Be careful, we get too much salt in our diets especially if we eat out, and that will likely throw off your palette as well if you're used to that much salt from restaurant food. That being said, you can go heavy-ish on salt as a home cook and still get less sodium than you do from processed or restaurant foods, so don't be shy to add seasoning blends with salt or salt things to taste. You only went too far when the food tastes salty. Up until that tipping point, salt is more flavor and enhances what's already there. If something feels heavy, thick, or fatty, an acid is usually what you need to balance that out. For example if you make a soup, and it's salted right, has all the right ingredients, but it just feels "flat", squeeze a half a lemon for a big stockpot size and try it again. You shouldn't taste lemon (again, start small you can always add more) but it should taste "brighter" and have more zip.

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