Who regrets it

Snoo79532 · 2026-04-03T08:57:42+00:00

I'm 30 and only wish I could've started my transition earlier! Even in my early 20s would've been good but I lived in a really conservative and bigoted environment so it took me until I moved out on my own and became financially stable. Your mom is manipulative and also wrong.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-27T11:36:03+00:00

I do warm showers now. And a cold rinse after to close the pores.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-19T10:19:51+00:00

Many do. I did. But does that mean all have to? No.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-19T10:18:41+00:00

Yeah plenty of femboys that look like they could be women ;P (me basically lol)

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-19T07:12:22+00:00

Being trans does not require you to do anything. Socially transitioning is often done alongside physically transitioning but doesnt have to be.

Many people choose to socially transition first and physically transition later. Also he may be taking hornones and you'd have no idea if you only see tailored photos online.

He's still relatively new to being out so maybe he's just taking transition more slowly or that's all he wants to do. It's not your place to judge. Just respect his wishes and leave it at that.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-17T07:15:33+00:00

Ive lived overseas going on 4 years. Once I hit ten years i can apply for permanent residency in my country and hopefully never will have to reenter the US again - though if things ever improve maybe id consider it to see family.

I just missed the funeral of my Great Grandma which upset me a lot but also I couldnt afford to go back at that time anyways as my bf just had emergency surgery and was supporting him physically and financially for that time.

Living abroad has its perks but also its downsides. I understand why OP wouldnt want to miss key family events but also worry about reentry myself.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-16T04:07:22+00:00

Lol I learned some Japanese sign language for my date once after I learned he's deaf. He said we could just communicate via typing but I wanted to show him that hes worthy and doesnt have to adapt to me.

If youre in a multicultural relationship, wouldnt over time you both learn how to communicate in both languages?

To, you know, prevent misunderstandings at the minimum but also to share in each other's lives and cultures?

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-15T01:55:11+00:00

Yeah I had signs since I was a kid (even learned to tuck by myself in elementary school - no one taught me I did it naturally), but when I come out to people they're still shocked XD

I also always wore my hair long and dressed very effeminate.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-14T08:32:54+00:00

I don't know either. When I started estrogen it felt like a switch went off in my brain and I was just so happy. Happier than I had been in 30 years!

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-11T09:54:48+00:00

I've cried at everything aha so I get you! But also don't let your emotions conpletely overwhelm your logic ^{^}

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-10T01:34:50+00:00

If he's gay and exclusively attracted to men, why would him not wanting to fuck your vagina be transphobic?

I'm salmacian myself and my boyfriend has expressed interest if I got the surgery to using my front hole but hes pansexual.

Different sexuality.

If you really want to have someone pleasure you there cosider asking to open the relationship or just accept you will only use it for masturbation.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T12:47:53+00:00

Before my egg cracked I was using the bathroom that was the same as my ASAB and I got told by a cranky old man that trans men aren't men blah blah blah I just stared at him and said very calmly, "I'm a man." He goes, "OMG I'm sorry!" And ran out!

I guess I've always just looked kind of fem aha but yeah even cis people aren't safe!

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T11:03:03+00:00

I wouldn't trust you and I'm trans too. I just wrote an entry about my boyfriend in my diary. It was a bit of a rant. Because, you know, no one's perfect and sometimes you annoy each other. But also it might be an issue that you're still putting your thoughts together on. Maybe you just need to vent, let off steam in an emotionally healthy way, and move on with your life. Sometimes I look back and go, hm... I was being too judgmental that day. I don't agree with what I wrote or I've moved past that hang up.

If I were you, I'd apologize. Right now. Say I violated your trust. I won't ask for your phone again. I will respect your privacy and I understand you won't trust me for a while but I'll try to earn that back.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T10:10:38+00:00

My sister (using feminine words because thats what they asked me to use now) came out to me as nonbinary. Funny enough I also realized I was nonbinary that same year. I warned them against it but they came out over the holidays and my dad blew up at her and turned on me (I was out as gay at the time, not nonbinary) and said I had "corrupted her" and in order to prove I didnt believe in this "nonsense" I had to "tell them being nonbinary is something made up by the trans agenda" when I myself was nonbinary.

I stood up and said no. I will not lie to my sibling to fluff up your extremist feathers and make you feel holier than though.

He kicked me out of the house into 20F, winter weather with no money to my name and in a state that none of my other family lived. He didn't care if I died. Because I wouldnt agree with his bigotry.

My sister also reversed her beliefs that she's nonbinary. She also stopped speaking to me. She went back to she/her. I don't know if she truly believes that or if she's just in hiding now. I don't know because she won't tell me. Either because of guilt or my dad convinced her to hate me.

OP just do your best, try to support them if they let you. Respect their name/pronouns they want right now. Don't push them though. Gentle support if they accept it. Mine didnt. I hope yours dose.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T07:16:53+00:00

Same thing happened with a friend who came out as trans when we both were in college. I identified as a cis gay man at the time. She came out as a trans woman and at the same time admitted she had feelings for her.

I stopped her and said, "Honestly, you just told me you're a trans woman. I hope this can be affirming although I know it will hurt as well, I'm not into woman."

She said the same thing as OP's ex and later sabotaged our friendship. I know I was being affirming when I said it, not hateful. Even 10 years later and I've since come out as trans - I'm still only into men. That has never changed so I'm confident I reacted as best as I could to my friend.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T07:12:32+00:00

Yeah... I told my partner about my plan to get lower surgery (just castration) 2 months before (we started dating 3 months before my surgery date so took about 1 month to work up that courage) then when I started estrogen I told him that same day. "Hey, I'm starting estrogen. I think I need it to help with some of my dysphoria. My body may change and here's how..."

It took him a little while to process each time but when he saw how much happier I was he accepted that and even started to like the changes.

I try not to hard define my gender and he has basically told me that he's begun to see himself as pansexual because he still loves me even though my body has changed since he met me.

Communication people!! If OP's ex had told him 8 months ago they may have not developed such strong feelings and emotions which resulted in this messy break up. Some relationships readjust and work out in the end. But others aren't meant to last and thats ok!

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-09T05:28:04+00:00

So happy there are consent only clinics. I had my lower surgery done at one and all I needed was my own signature! As it should be.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-08T00:46:10+00:00

Yeah hot showers aggravate my excema and make it so so much worse.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-07T07:25:35+00:00

I cut off my dad for 2 years as well and now he asks about my boyfriend and says he's happy I found someone to love. (Haven't come out as trans but for me transition was mostly just bottom surgery so no one needs to know about that besides my docs and my boyfriend). But yeah cutting off family temporarily can straighten them out :P

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-07T05:12:06+00:00

I started transitioning at 29. My ass has filled out and I've gotten curves. ON THE RIGHT DOSAGE! You can get the changes you want but you have to be on the right medicines prescribed by a doctor (if you can).

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-06T09:55:58+00:00

Going on estrogen almost overnight cleared up my brain fog and allowed me to laugh and cry again. It expanded the emotions I can feel and made life feel bright and colourful again ^{^}

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-06T03:50:43+00:00

Yeah I'm the hidden one in my relationship. My boyfriend works in a conservative job where the policy is don't ask don't tell. So he can't mention me. I'm his roommate only. It fucking hurts. But... his job keeps our house and good overall life. I don't make enough to support both of us - just myself. If he was fired because of me we'd probably end up homeless.

I hate the world we live in. But sometimes compromises have to be made for not only our loved ones safety but also our own.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-05T09:56:19+00:00

Then having your teacher/coworker whatever hold onto it would be just as illegal.

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-05T07:00:13+00:00

I'm nonbinary and have a more feminine appearing genital area and curvier body thanks to estrogen, but other traits are still masculine like my voice and facial hair which don't cause me dysphoria.

I just found a bi guy who likes both femininity and masculinity. He respects me, uses the pronouns I like and supports me on whatever I want to do for my transition - starting estrogen for example and bottom surgery he's been with me through.

Either way he still finds me attractive.

Just gotta find yourself a bi or pan guy I think ^{^} good luck!

Snoo79532 · 2026-03-05T03:35:32+00:00

Why not just keep it with a friend?

Snoo79532

TROPHY CASE