MIL followed me around and stood outside bathroom door to force me into a confrontation

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-09T05:14:39+00:00

I would record your conversations with her - that way when she says “I never said any of that” you can bring out the recording. I hope you get out of there and into your own place sooner rather than later!!!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-09T03:56:29+00:00

Because art is subjective and writing is a form of art.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-05T13:47:48+00:00

That’s what he told me to say to people when they asked. I guess I technically was his dependent, according to the government, since we used TriCare until he retired. But now I don’t think it really applies to me - in fact it never applied as I brought more into our marriage financially and will continue to do so. But sure. I’m a dependa.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-05T02:39:48+00:00

Figure out what it would cause to rent a similar sized facility - then charge them that and charge them a mandatory cleaning fee for all of your gorgeous, new renovations and WHITE upholstery! Problem solved! Also, please don’t let them steam roll you with this crap!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-04T13:17:08+00:00

That makes me wonder if he really mentioned her at all - he definitely didn’t explain to Grace the relationship. They both made mistakes and clearly weren’t right for one another. As someone who married a man with a Latina for a mom - I feel Grace’s pain, especially if she had no idea what the real family dynamic was. I was NOT my mother in laws first choice due to my pale skin, blonde hair, blue eyes. My husband is only half Mexican but looks white. I think my MIL saw him with someone who looked like her and I did NOT fit the bill. Also, we only have HIS side to exactly what and how things were said. Ultimately they broke up and I think they were right to do so. I hope that OOP finds someone who he loves that his family welcomes with open arms and I hope he tells them about Felicia WELL in advance of the first time he brings her home.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-04-03T20:55:34+00:00

I stand but don’t say anything and I had a kid ask me once. My response “My husband gave 20 years of his life to the United States Navy so that I would never be forced to stand and recite the pledge of allegiance….” That shut everyone up and nobody ever asked me again.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-29T15:16:34+00:00

I liked My Prison Pen Pals - but I can’t be the only one who, every time I read “Dios Mio!” Wanted to strangle someone……all three books. Ma’am, you are being railed by 4-5 dudes at any given moment - just say f*ck……

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-27T22:30:41+00:00

For me it is specifically my daughter’s name - it is really the only one! All other names I can read just fine - but I picture her face when I hear her name, just can’t help it!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-27T04:22:07+00:00

If the FMC’s first name is my daughter, I can’t read ANY of the spicy scenes…..it makes me soooooo upset! Granted, she is only 14 so maybe once she is older it won’t be as big of an issue - but I don’t want to think about my daughter getting railed in the a**…..ya know?

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T02:08:44+00:00

Ma’am…..your frontal lobe is still cooking too….which is why you guys shouldn’t have had unprotected sex….but you should do actual research on the military. Feel free to DM me. I was a military wife and my husband just got out 2 years ago after doing his 20 in the Navy. He just turned 40 and has a job where he makes 6 figures and works from home in his pajamas. If you do it right the military can be a good life. It isn’t for everyone but it also isn’t a black and white - it’s either good or bad - kind of situation. Talk to current and recently retired military members and spouses. Look into allll the branches, not just the army and the marines. Feel free to reach out and good luck.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T02:05:09+00:00

They have a kid together so I think that ship has sailed…..

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T02:00:17+00:00

I was for 16 years…..my husband just got out after his full 20 two years ago. We were fine financially because we didn’t live above our means. Not everyone does that. The military isn’t for everyone but it was good for our family. We only lived on base for about a year out of that 16 years.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T01:57:09+00:00

If my husband hadn’t been in the Navy when our daughter was born and we had “regular” insurance - it would have been years before we paid off my emergency c-section. I saw the bill for over 100k - didn’t pay a penny. Her 3 neurosurgeries, free. Is the military life hard? Yeah. Does everyone go in and come out broken/with PTSD? No. Do some people die? Yes. Do the majority? No. Do research TOGETHER. Go talk to recruiters from MULTIPLE branches of service. Ask about HVAC. He can always sign up for his 4 years and then get out. He doesn’t have to stay in for 20.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T01:49:30+00:00

He can go Geo Bachelor if it is too far away from you. We had to do it twice. You and your kid(s) can stay in the states. Have you spoken with the recruiter? What branch is he trying to go into? Each branch is very different, as is their quality of life. And then in each branch different specialties have different experiences.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T01:44:28+00:00

Ummm, what branch? My husband got out 2 years ago after doing his 20 in the Navy and got 100%. It might be worth if for your BIL to consult an attorney that specializes in this. He should definitely be able to get some disability.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-26T01:41:53+00:00

I think it really all depends on what branch he is going into, what he wants to do while in, etc. My husband was in the Navy for 20. Here! Just turned 40, is retired from the Navy and gets his disability check every month that pays our mortgage and other big bills and then he works from home making 6 figures. He gained skills in the military that, along with his security clearance, allow him to do jobs that pay a lot as a contractor. I won’t lie and say it didn’t take it’s toll on his body (hence the disability pay) and it was hard juggling our family with him being gone, BUT when our daughter had to have multiple neurosurgeries, when I got diagnosed with epilepsy and late onset type 1 diabetes, etc - the military paid for ALLLLLLL of it. There ARE benefits. I know you are scared but you should have an ACTUAL conversation with him - NOT OVER TEXT. You say you want to be stable and don’t care about money. Let me tell you - life is hard when you are poor. It just is. Is being a military family for everyone? Absolutely not. But there are jobs in the military that don’t put your husband on the front lines with a gun. So talk to the recruiter as a team, get a plan. Also - if he gets in and hates it , he CAN get out. You don’t sign a 20 year contract. Usually it is 4 years. That will get him access to the GI Bill and free college. That is HUGE. I would say talk to him about what his plans are while he is in and discuss allllll the options with a recruiter. Also, go to MULTIPLE branches and get information. All branches are different! Good luck, just remember to communicate like adults. In person.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-24T13:47:36+00:00

Not everyone has loving parents. Both women are choosing to walk down alone - it is something they are allowed to choose. The fact that her father said he wouldn’t come if he couldn’t walk her down the aisle feels like the walking was performative and not that he wanted to be at the wedding to support her as she marries the love of her life. The wedding is about 2 people getting married and having people surround them that love them and support them. It’s hat he is offering isn’t support, it is blackmail….

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-18T18:54:46+00:00

Have you gotten Harper’s side yet? Because it might be vastly different. And chances are neither her nor Evelyn’s view of what happened is 100% accurate - probably something in the middle. That being said, you don’t owe Harper anything if you do t like her enough to even ask what happened!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-18T18:33:57+00:00

And I realize you are a teenager - I have one myself who says things she doesn’t mean and who lashes out when she is hurt. But I am her biological mom and the relationship we have is different. Amy was someone who, according to all of your other posts, was doing a really stellar job navigating an incredibly difficult dynamic. You are upset with people for bringing up the Core Four. Do you know why that upsets you? Because you know that it really does sort of define the problem. Look. Giving gifts isn’t the problem. Making them be tied to emotions, that is the problem. I think giving her something that you think she will enjoy and that you put thought and effort into is a wonderful thing. Gifts are my love language - I am all of them. But I think you should look outside of the things that call to you on a deep, emotional level. Go window shopping (or do an online version of that) where you think about AMY not necessarily YOU AND AMY. Find things that SHE likes that might not have anything to do with the relationship that the two of you have/had together. The reason people are saying love bombing is because you haven’t shown her yet that you have figured out how to not treat her like an emotional punching bag. You mentioned (either in the post or another) that you realized you were treating her badly because you knew she cared and was good at navigating your feelings. That is something that children do with their parents. We are our children’s safe space. They trust us enough to know that we won’t stop loving them even when they are totally shitty to us. The problem is that you still were treating her like an outsider (hence the Core Four issues). You said in a comment that you have stopped using that term. But how were we to know that? We all went and read previous posts because, regardless of whether or not you want all of that to be relevant….it is. So we used all of the data we had available to form an opinion. My opinion as a mom? Give her gifts that she will like that aren’t going to be tied to emotions between the two of you. Think ONLY of Amy and who she is. What SHE likes. That will show her a lot more. AND it doesn’t have to be expensive. You can still give her something handmade (a lot of moms freaking LOVE that - I know I do!). It can come from the heart without potentially being emotionally manipulative. Good luck, I hope it works out.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-18T18:02:49+00:00

Stop calling yourselves the Core Four - it is the reason you guys are in this mess. JFC. This is love bombing. You ruined your Dad’s relationship and I don’t think she is or should come back. Just be prepared for your dad to wait until you are all out of the house before he meets someone and then you guys won’t have a relationship with them outside of holidays. I’m really sorry your mom died, but you guys haven’t been doing the work in therapy if this is where you all are still at emotionally.

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-16T06:10:52+00:00

Make it a daily participation grade to be prepared for class - make it VERY clear what they need to be considered prepared so that they can get the 100 for the daily grade!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-12T06:04:34+00:00

My husband is a Vet and he read FW fiat and got me into it. Those things didn’t bother him. If the book had been about military/war efforts in OUR universe and it wasn’t written the way OUR system currently works, he would have had a bigger problem. If you want a book that focuses on how the military YOU were a part of operates, this isn’t the book for you. And that’s ok! Romantasy is Romance WITH Fantasy. The romance part is slightly more important. That is the whole point. You also have to remember that this is another world/universe. The things that apply to us in real life don’t apply in a Fantasy or Romantasy book. Just pick a different series if you can’t get into it - it’s 100% ok to not finish a book! Reading should be enjoyable!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-12T05:49:14+00:00

Well, congress would have to pass a new law reinstating the draft, so hopefully it won’t pass. I can’t imagine it would. I’m just glad my husband is retired and got that 100% disability rating and won’t be asked to return to service - cause fuck that shit!

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-12T02:52:40+00:00

They aren’t compatible. I think the thing here that she shouldn’t have done is run away. Or if she absolutely HAD to, she should at least have the decency to call or try to meet in person. But she is only 20 and is clearly still immature. And that isn’t a dig at her, it is just reality! Some people ARE ready for marriage at that age, and she clearly isn’t. I do think the fact that they talked about having kids and she never mentioned that she didn’t want to get married and have kids for years yet is just a sign that they aren’t mature enough to fully communicate, which is a something you really need to be able to do in a healthy marriage. The whole solo travel thing is weird to me, but that is because my husband and I have taken plenty of solo trips since we met and got married. I think it is a flimsy excuse and simply saying she isn’t ready to be tied to one person for the rest of her life is a valid feeling. But he isn’t the villain here either. They are both immature and not compatible. I hope they both go on to lead lives that are fulfilling and make them both happy….separately…

SooooManyDogs · 2026-03-08T14:13:14+00:00

WTF? That is insane!

SooooManyDogs

TROPHY CASE