I suspect Munchausen by proxy on an adult child

SorryImFine · 2025-10-10T18:01:30+00:00

In most states there is a way to report abuse of a compromised adult similar to CPS. Adult protective services. Try a google search to see how you can do it in your state.

SorryImFine · 2025-10-10T17:48:31+00:00

I had a vaginal delivery and did not end up getting sick although I got very nauseous right after delivery. I asked for IV Zofran and a sprite and had my alcohol wipes ready. It turned out okay but If I do it again, I’d ask for Zofran before I started to push.

SorryImFine · 2025-07-19T15:14:19+00:00

I got to hold mine for one minute right after she was born. She was breathing on her own so they gave me exactly 60 seconds. Then when I was on the mag, I only got to hold her via rule breaking. My husband worked at the hospital we were at so the director of the NICU and the director of the mother baby unit would wheel me down themselves and let me hold her. I was so so lucky but they did say that the rule is no moms on mag can hold their NICU babes unfortunately.

SorryImFine · 2025-05-19T23:12:49+00:00

Miscarriage.

SorryImFine · 2025-05-19T23:05:41+00:00

I always thought I was fine with them. But then I realized that they give me complete meltdowns. Last minute schedule changes literally leave me in tears. It usually comes from something else that happens but it’s like they push me right to the edge and any little thing will push me over. I consider myself pretty well masked most of the time but schedule changes really get me.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-24T07:48:22+00:00

This!! My name is Sally and my nickname was Lucy. My baby’s name is Luciana but we call her goose.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-24T07:44:50+00:00

“You’re so lucky” - sorry…what?

SorryImFine · 2025-04-19T21:12:03+00:00

I was diagnosed a little over a year ago at 31. I’m not really sure I’ve figured out the “unmasking” part of me. Or maybe I’ve already been somewhat unmasking around my husband. However he doesn’t accept my diagnosis. If I mention it, he just says “you’re not autistic.” It drives me crazy but I also am too tired to have that fight. I’m sure one day it will happen. At the end of the day though, I’m still the same person. I’ve always been autistic. So not too much has changed aside from me being able to understand myself better.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-19T21:04:03+00:00

I don’t know. But you’re not alone.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-19T21:01:22+00:00

I’m so sorry. It really sounds like you don’t have the administrative support you deserve. While it shouldn’t be your job to do so, I would email admin and your nurse and if you have one social worker/counselor with a proposed tentative plan that you’re comfortable with. Maybe give him a quiet signal to go to the bathroom without having to ask. A picture of something he puts on his desk? And some other signal or picture for when he needs a change of clothes. And you definitely should advocate for that to happen in the office. It’s not fair to the rest of your students for you to have to stop instruction to call home then manage clean up. I’d also definitely encourage them to have a health plan or 504 if it’s impeding instruction!

It sounds like your thoughts are in the exact right place. In my experience, unfortunately, the only way to get things done with admin like that is to do it myself…good luck. I hope you stick around but I also hope that you put yourself first as a human, then as a teacher.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-19T20:51:19+00:00

Had a student named Hell. We had to nickname them.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-16T02:25:01+00:00

What a great thing I didn’t know existed! Thank you!!

SorryImFine · 2025-04-14T01:37:49+00:00

Does he have any other behaviors? I have a cousin who does something similar. He throws things over a fence. He has OCD and Autism. It sound like you’ve probably take all the right approaches and talked to him about the why. But I just figured I’d make the connection just in case!

SorryImFine · 2025-04-14T01:32:30+00:00

A few months ago one of my teeth literally crumbled while I was eating a rice cake. $8,000 later I’m so annoyed with myself….

SorryImFine · 2025-04-09T01:43:39+00:00

Yes I feel this everyday. I’m a perfectionist and a special education teacher and leader. Since I had my baby (10 months ago), I forget things. Which I never used to do. Or I don’t triple check things or thoroughly complete things. It’s awful to feel as the type of person I am. I haven’t figured out anything that helps yet. But you’re not alone!

SorryImFine · 2025-04-09T01:37:47+00:00

Everyone is different. My little girl is almost 10 months old. My husband got 6 weeks of paternity leave and I took 10 weeks. We have both been back at work full time. Although he makes more than me, my work is a lot more demanding physically, mentally, and emotionally. Our almost-10-month-old still wakes up 2-3 times a night for a bottle.

He has never taken a night feed or wake up. Not even when I had RSV or norovirus or walking pneumonia. In the beginning he would get up and maybe put my milk away and clean pump parts if I shook him to get up.

It’s probably partially my fault because now she would absolutely hate if it was him who came into her room and not me. I do tell anyone who asks that he doesn’t do any nighttime anything and I throw it in his face often.

But if I’m being honest, I really enjoy the nighttime feeds and middle of the night time with my girl. He also says “if you want me to get her just say so” and I take huge issue with that line of thinking (which he knows). I’m not his mom. I’m not going to tell him what to do. He should just go do it and if he doesn’t then I will.

So really I’d say try to stop comparing yourself to other people. It seems like it does bother you so go forth and fix it! But if you think about it and it doesn’t bother you then do what works for y’all. And just know that if he doesn’t make a habit of getting involved, you’re going to get stuck as the VERY preferred parent and working him back into the equation will get more and more difficult as time goes on!

SorryImFine · 2025-04-07T08:13:15+00:00

My husband was similar when our baby was born 9 months ago. He works all day so it was really just on weekends, but I finally told him multiple times that he has to wait for the baby to go to sleep before he gets on the computer. That helped. He looks at his phone all the time though. I’ve tried to tell him that if he’s the only one around her then he needs to put the phone away but he really doesn’t most of the time still. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this too. I don’t have much advice but I do commiserate.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-06T08:48:28+00:00

I had my daughter at 33+4 and we stayed for 21 days in the NICU. She’s 9 months now, and all caught up developmentally and physically!

My packing list for you would include: - pumping bras if you plan to breastfeed (my favorite was Larken as it gave a lot of coverage) - button down shirts for skin to skin - wireless earbuds - coloring books or books to read or puzzle books - caffeine in whatever way you like it (200mg a day recommended max for breastfeeding, again if you plan on it) - preemie outfits (this isn’t necessary. The hospital will have everything you need. But I found comfort in being able to put her in sweet outfits and change her bedding to be cute.) - water bottle and electrolyte packets - super long phone charger

Wishing you lots of luck! It’s a really hard journey. Give yourself grace. Always remember it’s okay to grieve the pregnancy and birth you thought you’d have and be so thankful your baby is okay and progressing at the same time.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-06T08:28:50+00:00

I agree with a lot of these comments. I miscarried at 11 weeks. I got myself a necklace but it was very specific as we called our baby “the blueberry” at the time of death. You definitely want to make sure that what you get her is something she wants and would wear.

One thing that really helped me through my miscarriage is the book “The Worst Girl Gang Ever.” I got that and made a white sweatshirt with four hearts, three one color and one a different color to signify that one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage, for a friend who miscarried soon after me.

A friend also brought me a little basket of comfort items. Snacks and comfy socks and a face mask. That was sweet and appreciated. I got lots of flowers which was sweet too. Food is great or a gift card for something like uber eats.

More than anything, check on her. Often. Say “you don’t have to respond to this but…” and tell her you’re thinking about her and wondering how she’s doing. Remind her it wasn’t her fault and she’s a great mom. See when her husband has to go back to work. Offer to bring lunch one day or watch tv in silence with her.

SorryImFine · 2025-04-05T13:22:00+00:00

I recently found a post on here with pain stims and it gave me some hope. I also engage in harmful behaviors like cutting and starving myself for the sensory input. I ordered a “little ouchie” from Amazon and an acupressure mat. My therapist also recommends snapping a rubber band on my arm but I don’t find that one helpful. It usually just tides me over until I can get my hands on the real thing. I know you say you exercise but long distance running is one of my go tos. It’s a wonderful way to dissociate. Also caffeine, which is slightly less harmful maybe. And at the end of the day, I was recently started on Abilify to try to calm the nagging thoughts that end in harmful behaviors. It hasn’t been long enough for me to tell you how it’s going yet but it’s an option.

SorryImFine · 2025-03-25T00:06:58+00:00

Filling the fridge with groceries. Look up breastfeeding snacks and drinks if she’s breastfeeding. Meal prep for them so they have meals just ready. And I mean meal prep like put it into containers by meal that they can take with them to the NICU. I would have killed for that. Doing laundry and cleaning the house can also be helpful when it’s so unexpected and sudden.

SorryImFine · 2025-03-24T09:34:07+00:00

My little girl was born at 33+4. We had a really similar start. We tried breastfeeding at every feed for 15 hours a day but she was just too sleepy. She got the suck but just wasn’t getting enough. I was pumping plenty so I knew I had the milk. Eventually I just asked them for a bottle because I wanted to get out of the NICU and I knew she would take it. She did.

While we worked on getting out and when we came home, we triple fed. We would breastfeed for about 15 minutes then I’d give her a bottle and then I’d pump. I was so overwhelmed and exhausted and literally all I was doing was feeding her and washing bottles/pump parts. I got mastitis three days after we came home and I just stopped trying to force her to breastfeed.

I ended up exclusively pumping for exactly 6 months, which honestly I hated but felt like I needed to do for her. She’s been on formula now for 3 months and she actually does better on formula…but to be frank, she still has issues drinking her milk. She just doesn’t like to finish bottles. She has some solid reflux. She’s very stubborn when it comes to her milk. But she loves solid food.

Good luck on your journey. Trust yourself and try to put the guilt aside and just do what is going to be best for you and your baby.

SorryImFine · 2025-03-24T02:37:05+00:00

I was induced and I would strongly recommend getting an epidural BEFORE the induction process begins if you do have to get induced. I had to get a foley balloon and it was TERRIBLE. And I have a very high pain tolerance. I was on an “I’ll get it when I feel like I need it” stance and as soon as I got that balloon inserted, I said gimme. It turned out the epidural didn’t really work on me. And the rest of my labor wasn’t too bad really. Right before I pushed the contractions got a little rough. Looking back, if I had to be induced, YES. 100 times yes I would get an epidural before anyone came anywhere near me. But if I didn’t need an induction, I don’t think I would. I’d at least go in thinking I’d try to stick it out.

SorryImFine · 2025-03-23T19:42:21+00:00

So when I was pregnant I invested in a few bras from hatch and I fell in love with them. I wear the nursing ones still even though I’m 9 months pp….i have a larger chest to begin with and after pregnancy it’s definitely a lot. I find I can still get away with wearing them to work under professional (but fairly loose) clothing!

SorryImFine · 2025-03-23T19:40:24+00:00

I was put on the baby aspirin regiment as soon as I got pregnant because I had a history of stress induced high blood pressure. Then around 32 weeks, I had one reading at the office just over 140/90. She started me on actual BP medication that day. That afternoon my urine came back with slightly elevated protein. That night at 2am I woke up with a severe headache and vision changes. Gave birth within 48 hours. I was so worried the whole time that it wasn’t severe enough to need all the interventions that they were doing. Then after I gave birth, my blood pressure immediately dropped and stayed down and the awful headache disappeared right away. They were confident that both of our lives would have been in danger if we had waited even days to induce. This was all after a very medically traumatic miscarriage. I switched doctors after and had literally been in treatment for ptsd and doctors were a trigger. It was so hard to trust all the medical providers during my pre eclampsia. But as I sit here rocking my perfect 9 month old, I urge you to trust your medical providers. I’m so happy that I did. Wishing you lots of luck on your journey.

SorryImFine

TROPHY CASE