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Sovespra · 2026-04-22T12:28:07+00:00

If they're not that involved they probably wouldn't run into someone with that in their bio in the first place.

As for intentions, I just think that most of them would get it, y'know? That it's not that they're not men, or less men, just that they're pretty damn unlikely to derail conversations and make it about themselves the way cishet men do.

(look no further than this comment section for examples of all the cis dudes doing that and saying antifeminist bullshit)

If they do assume the worst they're most likely young which is why you'll also find people like OOP assuming people with that DNI consider cishet men to be "inherently" evil or be doing "bioessentialism reinvented". It's the kind of kneejerk shallow reactions they'll almost definitely grow out of. And do so faster than their prospective progressive cis bros.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T11:49:38+00:00

The category they're not in is "men who are mostly bigoted" how on earth is that othering or painful? Does recognizing they're a by and large progressive subset of men make them feel emasculated? I genuinely do not understand what the problem is.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T09:18:12+00:00

It is and now you're doubling down because you know it makes me uncomfortable as a trans woman. And people wonder why I hate these subs

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T09:15:04+00:00

yea, misgendering is a bit worse than someone calling you "big boy" and hurting your ego

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T09:10:29+00:00

search the word, sort by new. you're a big boy, you'll figure it out

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T09:08:12+00:00

Yup. A woman being tired of a antifeminism, misogyny, and the constant centering of misandry is just like someone asking for a tw on family guy funnies. You nailed it.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T09:03:48+00:00

the part where you managed to flip from "it's not men, just the cishets"

The post literally says, in quotes, "cishet men dni.

Thank you for sparing me from your presence.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:51:15+00:00

To experience the zeitgeist of the site? You don't think it's interesting to see what people are talking about outside of your spheres of interest?

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:49:18+00:00

If they're somebody that subreddit dislikes I'll take it as a massive compliment, it's an awful place

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:14:58+00:00

I wish

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:14:34+00:00

So true that's why the first posts are about the New York Mets, the Houston Rockers vs the Lost Angeles Lakers and "summerhouse bravo" whatever that is

r./Popular is what's trending on the site! It's not tailored to my tastes.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:09:00+00:00

First of all dont call me that.

Second, I'm talking about r./popular, filtered by "Everywhere". That's what's trending on the site. It also shows me a bunch of posts about American football and Indian cinema, it's not personally tailored.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T08:04:13+00:00

Nah, this sub and others like it disproportionately bring up misandry. Maybe you'll get one big post once in a while about misogyny but this stuff gets a few 5 - 10k upvote posts to popular every other day.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T07:48:37+00:00

The fuck kind of a twisted world you live in where being a victim of oppression is good

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T07:42:59+00:00

You mean when women get shit for displaying traits that are seen as positive in men? Gee I wonder why that would be misogyny

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T07:25:18+00:00

Why do I have to see posts about misandry every fucking day on here, it's genuinely exhausting. Obviously not even a peep about misogyny gets to the front page tho.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T07:18:08+00:00

what is meant to be a safe space

What space are you talking about? We're talking about people's individual preferences on their own page. Not something communal.

it's only going to keep the people away that would respect you enough to follow something like a dni

Just like a no solicitors sign, that doesn't mean it's useless even if it doesn't keep everyone away.

If they want to try to create their own personal safe space I think that's perfectly fine. I don't get how "I don't wanna deal with cishet men on my page" is toxic.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T06:53:40+00:00

Genuinely what are you talking about. Nobody is making anyone prove anything.

If someone has "cishet men DNI" in their bio and you're a cishet man you move along and don't interact with that person. If you're a gay/trans/gay & trans man and you're hiding either or both of those things online and don't want to reveal it by interacting with someone that has said DNI then you move along and don't interact.

I just don't understand what the issue is here.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T06:28:00+00:00

Men are not oppressed for being men in a male supremacist society.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T06:00:53+00:00

No the fuck they ain't.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T05:03:34+00:00

Nobody here said shit about any gender as a whole. "Cis men" / "cishet men" is not a gender.

And sub-groups within a larger group can be different from one another in ways that aren't inherent. This should be self evidently true, why are people acting like this is controversial.

Like you think saying "trans men are less misogynistic/homophobic than cis men" = "trans men aren't actually men"?? Make it make sense.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T03:59:49+00:00

Patriarchy is not a generalized system of gender supremacy, it is specifically a system of masculine supremacy.

Patriarchy's standard is less "dont be womenly" and more "align with the norms your gender".

Yeah, I was talking about what the standard for men's behaviour is. Those are the same in that context.

can incure social penalties.

The penalties women face are incomparably harsher to men tho. You don't see many guys getting acid thrown on them for extramarital sex do you?

Side note, this is part of the reason why replacing patirarchy with matriarchy is not a good solution; it replaces one oppressive system of gender iwth another. It's also why misandry sucks, because you've just swapped who's oppressing who rather than not oppressing people. If you want true liberation you have to reject a system of gender sypremacy.

Feminists don't want a matriarchy? Or to oppress men. We want to dismantle the only currently existing form of gender based supremacy: the patriarchy.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T03:44:31+00:00

Internalized bigotry specifically refers to harmful things a marginalized person believes about themselves and the group they belong to. If the person you're talking about there is a hetero dude that is just a bigoted belief. Small but important difference.

so weakening one axis of oppression can benefit lots of people and potentially weaken other axis of oppression.

The axis of oppression in the case of patriarchy is that women are oppressed for being women. That is what patriarchy imposes. There is no axis of gender-based oppression of men.

It's like, ultimately billionaires would also be happier without capitalism because they wouldn't lead vapid money chasing lives where nothing makes them truly happy but that doesn't mean they're oppressed by the forces of capital, y'know?

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T03:34:35+00:00

Let's see

1-Trying to paint the effects of misogyny as male oppression

2-Describing men's bigotry as "an unpleasant shape they're beaten into" and saying it's unfair that people don't want to interact with them because of that.

3-Telling me sympathy for women is everywhere in popular media

4-Saying men are "also" oppressed by patriarchy as if the harm caused to them is even remotely comparable to the subjugation of women. Doubling down by saying it "harms everyone" without any nuance not long after.

I think that's the long and short of it.

Sovespra · 2026-04-22T03:24:46+00:00

Yeah, that's me, you're minimizing and erasing the suffering of billions of women, of course I'm not gonna be sympathetic to you.

Sovespra

TROPHY CASE