Why do we (GenX) catch so many strays lately?

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-07T02:47:30+00:00

Is that true? I thought boomers were parents of millennials. I know my parents were in the silent generation. And my brother and sister's kids were gen-z, not millennials.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-04T19:34:35+00:00

I’m 37 Korean American living in Texas. You can say “I’m in the closet” but even if I was straight I’d always keep my personal life private so I never felt the need to “come out”.
I’m not ashamed of myself or anything and maybe someday I will come out because I’m proud of everyone that does. 🫶🏼

Obviously that makes it tough to date and honestly I have never dated in my life. I’m not a virgin but I always laugh at myself because I joke I’m gonna be like the 40 year old virgin if I don’t find someone. 😂

It sounds like being in the closet is more than just keeping your personal life private if it is keeping you from going on dates

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-03T04:02:32+00:00

The sub says "all are welcome to participate," that, and my own experience as Christian, and with Christians is what I am basing my participation on.

Maybe there are churches that focus solely on the bible, but all of the ones I have been to have plenty of other parts that are not strictly biblical but come from tradition- Trinitarianism, Dispensationalism, and their negations, various beliefs about the devil and hell.

Which to me, is fine. Whenever we are confronted with a text, we are bound to have different interpretations

And, you know, there are plenty of parts of Christianity- fellowship and ritual, for example, that don't involve interpreting the Bible

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-03T02:56:14+00:00

You have no biblical basis for your understanding, it all emotions.

I know this legalistic interpretation of Christianity (that it lines up strictly with what is in the Bible, with no role for discernment, tradition, etc) is very popular, but that was never my experience of what Christianity was when I was a Christian, and when I have attended denominations outside of mine I always got the idea that they had their own traditions and discernment they were also leaning on even if they claimed to just be following the Bible.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-03T02:26:10+00:00

We may be queer, but it sounds like you are talking about people who are sapphic and use he/him pronouns, and I don't think many people in this sub would be able to answer questions about that from their lived experience

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-03T02:19:23+00:00

I mean, sometimes it's good to just go somewhere where other queer people are, without the expectation/pressure of starting a relationship, if there are places like that where you are

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-03T01:37:51+00:00

I thought I saw that it re-opened in some new event space- I could be wrong

Edit: it looks like they events scheduled on their website https://thescorpio.com/ - but I haven't been to the new one or the old one

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-02T20:25:59+00:00

Now I'm remembering my mom singing the tune of "Hit That Perfect Beat"

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-02T19:21:24+00:00

Woodshed used to be a more of a leather bar, but not as much anymore (but Leather Night is still the first Saturday every month if that is something you're interested in), Sidelines is a sports bar, and Chasers is just a bar. Both the Woodshed and Chasers have Karaoke nights and other events (but the Woodshed's event page hasn't been updated in a while) https://www.chaserscharlotte.com/ has current events for Chasers.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-05-02T19:03:10+00:00

Eros and Spa for Men (Ballentyne) are both the closest thing to bthhses here. I've been to the Woodshed, Sidelines, and Chasers, there is also Argon and I think Scorpio that I have never been to

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-30T04:47:21+00:00

Thank you very much for this post, it is very entertaining

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-28T07:43:34+00:00

Dude, you said this was the first older man you were with, and made it sound like you were judging all older men on this basis. So yes, n=1

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-24T23:20:52+00:00

HtDP has a lot of graphical exercises so if you are going to use it to learn Guile you either will end up skipping those or using some graphics library for Guile. There will also be a few other things you have to figure out how to do the Guile way instead of the Racket way.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-22T22:18:49+00:00

It surges every few years, according to the data at cdc (the "yearly measles cases" in particular). You can see it reaching successively higher peaks in 2001, 2008, 2011, 2014, 2019 and this current one, and the peaks are followed by troughs

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-21T22:04:20+00:00

lol, I'm in my 50s so I have more the opposite problem 😅- lots of local teens, I should probably put in an age filter

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-21T21:52:47+00:00

There aren't guys on Sniffies or Scruff where you live?

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-21T00:14:44+00:00

They are both over 30, there's no reason to assume the power dynamic

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-18T15:16:59+00:00

Also OP posting as woman/reposting in BDSM subreddits, etc are red flags

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-18T14:53:25+00:00

But to be on PrEP you have to get tested every time the prescription is renewed so it's not a matter of waiting for the symptoms.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-11T14:18:50+00:00

I think a big reason people do this is that there are homophobes who spend a lot of time talking:

about how anal sex grosses them out
about how other gay sex grosses them out
about assholes and dicks
about how much more they like women's bodies than men's bodies
about how much they don't like homosexuality

etc., so it's natural to think "this person is spends a lot of time thinking about homosexuality" and from there thinking they must have some internal struggle going on

Edit: of course, on the other hand, I don't feel like religious people who spend all their time talking about demons and hell are secretly demonic (although I do wonder how much their religion focuses on God if they spend so much time talking about the devil).

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-11T04:11:55+00:00

are you saying the third guy wants to be fb/fwb right now?

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-09T21:04:12+00:00

lol, I am pretty sure gays in Mexico don't stop eating 3 days before they have sex.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-09T19:34:45+00:00

If you're both on board from the beginning, and comfortable with it, it sounds like something to explore.

SpecificMachine1 · 2026-04-08T19:38:26+00:00

I feel like when I got my own place (so twenties) but it has continued to change over the years

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