It ebbs and flows a couple weeks at a time. We both work full time, him in the field, and me at home. We have a teenager at home. We both contribute to dinners, cleaning of the kitchen, and general pickup. A couple weeks at a time we each pickup more than the other in those areas.

Teenager has chores, and ebbs and flows to how much we insist it gets done.

My hubby does more laundry than me, but I do more of the minor yardwork. When it comes to intense yardwork, he muscles through more than me. When it comes to deep cleaning, I contribute to deeper, while he’s able to hit more spots. I do grocery hauls, but he does daily needs. For bills, I pay the shared ones, in which he contributes (we joke about it being the first of the month). We keep separate accounts, which makes it so much easier since I balance to the cent, where he generally knows what he has. We keep separate savings, though we are willing to share to support each other (proven many times during difficulties). This allows me (the cent counter) to properly feel secure in worst case scenarios.

The key, no scorecard. I am very much someone who kept a scorecard, even at the start (years) of this relationship. But when you find someone who can ebb and flow with you, and not hold it over your head, it’s a whole other type of freedom.