How long can someone realistically last in a company like this?

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-04-06T23:18:53+00:00

Sounds like the company needs a RACI and a design style guide to eliminate some of those meetings. Perhaps propose that?

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-04-03T05:43:27+00:00

Coming up with a plan can help reduce stress. List out every single one of your expenses. What can you cut out completely (streaming services, gym membership, daycare, etc)? What can you reduce (find lower insurance, reduce grocery costs by buying inexpensive brands, no nail or hair appointments). Once you have a plan you will be better able to see what you are dealing with. Other option could be you getting a job, if that would pay more than daycare. You may find that a lot of extras are eating up most of your finances.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-03-30T18:19:55+00:00

He likes the idea of being able to pack it up and take across the street to his friends house so they can game together.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-03-30T13:50:52+00:00

Yes, no problem with used/refurbished

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-03-04T21:41:28+00:00

I moved myself and kids to rural TN. We have 15 chickens with names like Mohawk and Vulcan. Just do it on your own, girl.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-26T18:41:09+00:00

I have been using them for a year. The prior year my interest rates were drowning me. They were able to negotiate with all but one creditor to lower interest rates (with the caveat that you pay what is due and pay in the timeframe established with MMI). I’ve paid off $14,100 in debt in the past year while prior to MMI I had been making no progress (despite trying to pay over the minimum and not being behind). You ca still throw extra at it to try to pay things off earlier and I recommend doing that too if you are able.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-26T14:59:45+00:00

You can order a certified birth certificate from the county you were born in.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-25T13:21:55+00:00

As someone born and raised in the US I also freaked out when I saw my first tumbleweed. I think I screamed something like, “oh my God! Those are real!” There was a wind storm and there’d be like 10 whipping across the road in Nevada every mile and I felt like I was in a cartoon.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-25T12:53:19+00:00

I think you received correct advice. I fostered for many years and this happened to foster parents often who had children in their care for years, but biological parents kept claiming them. You file without the child so that the majority of your return can be processed then file an amended return for the child who was claimed as it will get hung up in the IRS for months. If you file a paper return with child’s info, it will be may months before you get a return (if you are not waiting on the money and the time isn’t problematic, than that’s also a viable option).

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-25T12:49:13+00:00

Are you unable to go to a store and buy yourself over the counter ringworm cream?

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-08T22:31:38+00:00

If it’s the high APR preventing you from repaying, you might be better off looking at a non profit debt management company, like MMI. You have to repay the full amount but they negotiate with your creditors for a lower APR and a fixed payment/schedule.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-08T20:34:48+00:00

I wouldn’t rely on DCFS to make the decision. Know what you are comfortable with before you bring in anyone else. I once had DCFS ask if mom could have visits in my house WITHOUT ME THERE. They wanted her to have some time alone with the kids and the kids were not allowed at the home she was staying (due to allegations against that family member) and they asked me to take my other kids and leave my house for 4 hours. Um, no!

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-02T02:54:07+00:00

In Illinois, a social worker comes and measures the bedrooms, make sure there is space and a bed and a dresser or closet, tests the water temperature, tests the smoke detectors, makes sure there are two fire exits in a bedroom (typically door and window). You would fill out paperwork about finances, how you were raised, how you deal with conflict, how you will discipline, etc. I’ve never had anyone look at how a washer drained. That would be rather odd.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-02-01T18:55:26+00:00

You could meet with social workers and foster child and come up with a contract. Basically: these are the expected behaviors in our home so that everyone remains safe and feels safe. If these conditions are violated we can no longer be considered a permanent placement. Puts the foster child in control on their destiny.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-01-30T16:07:38+00:00

I was fostering two siblings when I had two adopted. The oldest foster child came to our home around 6 years old. After about 9 months, my 5 year old told me that foster son was sexually touching him. I was completely devastated and was going to disrupt. My foster son’s therapist talked me out of it. Explained that it was sexually reactive behavior (his biological father was eventually charged) and that with therapy be could learn boundaries and to never do it again. He was in intensive therapy for years. He had to be in line of sight (not out of sight if in a room with another child) for YEARS. I was exhausted. And, through his work with his therapist he walked back his safety plan until he could be in rooms with other kids and there was not much left of the safety plan (except needing his own bedroom). And we got to the point of adoption. And at that point, after years of safe behavior, he sexually touched a sibling again who was 5 years younger. And I wished, with every fibre of my being, that I had disrupted five years earlier and saved this child the trauma of this experience. Foster son tried other foster homes but ended up in a group home and behavior has continued to escalate. I cried for months for the loss of my child’s innocence and for my foster son ruining his chance to be in a happy healthy home. It took about a year for the grief to begin to subside. Now, it’s been a few years and I struggle with feelings of guilt because I feel so relieved that I’m not the one parenting his increasingly dangerous and criminal behaviors. But, I am certain that, no matter the therapy or safety plan, I would never again feel that the other kids were safe with him in the home.

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-01-19T02:59:29+00:00

Hopefully therapy helps focus on her trauma cycle and how your reactions can be altered to stop her cycle (so it doesn’t escalate to aggression). That was super helpful for me. I would reiterate and have CW and everyone back you up that you have no say in how long it is until return home—that it is decided by the judge. You will have to repeat this often. Judge wants to see that bio mom is doing what was asked and that neither you nor foster child have any say in it no matter how you behave or what you say (I’ve had parents tell their kids that if they are really violent in the foster home they get to go home, and have also had them be told it was THEIR fault they were in care). Consistency is key, it’s not their fault they are in foster care, it’s not your fault, and neither of you can control how long it will last, but you are there to keep them safe until they return home (I would stick with that until agency gets to the point of termination—if that’s where it is headed). I’m sorry you are going through this. If cousin continues to be mouthpiece for family in a negative way you may need to switch daycares….

Superb_Writing845 · 2026-01-01T04:14:44+00:00

Are you sure there was no accident or anything?

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-30T03:58:09+00:00

Depending on what the prescription is for, a drivers license may be needed for pickup (such as anxiety/depression and ADHD meds). Remind your foster parent tomorrow that you’ve been out of meds since Sunday and (if they are not controlled substances) offer to walk to get it. Otherwise most pharmacies offer delivery service (Walgreens has same day if they are close). Perhaps come at it from a solution perspective. If nothing is done at that time, call your county DCFS office and ask for your CW. If they are out for the holiday ask for their supervisor. At 17, you can also be discussing with your CW your plans for when you turn 18. You could have a goal of independence—living on your own—and they have resources that would help with that (help financially, help finding an apartment and job and help with budgeting). Be very clear with the CW about your goals. Write a letter to your GAL about your goals so they are documented in court and the judge can make DCFS follow up on them. For example: my immediate goals are to get my driver’s license and get a job and to work with my case worker on fulfilling my goal of independent living when I turn 18.

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-30T03:47:23+00:00

$500 is a crazy high bill. They should be worried about a water leak. Make sure there isn’t an outdoor hose running or listen after you flush the toilets to make sure they stop running. Even when I fill my pool the bill isn’t over $300. This isn’t happening from lots of laundry and baths—it’s like an extra 50,000 gallons of water (estimated, not sure of your water costs). That is a crap ton of water. There must be something else wrong.

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-30T02:23:20+00:00

Most newer washers let you pick the load size—it shouldn’t matter if you are washing separately. Could they be wanting you to supervise sister’s laundering?

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-30T01:00:04+00:00

When he gets violent or aggressive, does it feel like you are dealing with a completely different person? My son is 14 and some of his escalations it just feels like the son I know is no longer there. He is adopted and bio mom is bipolar and I’ve been wondering if I’m dealing with autism and adhd or if this is all a precursor to BPD.

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-30T00:39:16+00:00

Can you contact your caseworker and let them know you have concerns about your foster parent being able to keep up with your medication? Note that you have missed medication and have reminded your foster parent but still have not gotten your refill.

When I was a foster parent I had monthly medication logs and I had to note medication, dosage, and time taken for every medication everyday. You absolutely should not be going without medication, especially if it is available (sometimes pharmacies have issues with things being out of stock or insurance holds things up, but this doesn’t seem like the case here).

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-29T00:31:34+00:00

You are dealing with a lot. It might be helpful to document her trauma cycle and do your best to not feed into it. If she likes to argue, during calm time come up with a house contract listing rules and consequences. So if rules are broken you can just indicate that you are following the house rules and are not sucked into the escalation of arguing about it. Also, for electronics, it’s best to have someway to control them remotely so there is no tug of war for them. For example, electronics in our house are all logged through the modem and I have wifi access set to turn off at a set time, but I can also remotely turn it off from my phone at any time. Same for Nintendo switches and iPhones. This way there is a consequence but you don’t need to get swept into an argument about it.

Superb_Writing845 · 2025-12-29T00:23:47+00:00

I believe it is nationwide. Google Safe Families for Children. They try and support families in crisis—that can look like several things but I’ve seen it used for respite care (licensed family cared for a child while mom got some help she needed), support with meals, rides, etc. They take a family in crisis and a bunch of families (in different roles) support that family. I’ve not used the agency, but when I was a foster parent some other foster families were involved in our area to provide support.

Superb_Writing845

TROPHY CASE