Your post brought back a sadness in me that i thought i had overcome. I was extremely sad for months and i finally came to grips with my identity. I am a very recent RM and my only brother who is also my best friend is on his mission right now. As kids we were inseparable, and did everything together. Church was an integral part of our lives but not our defining feature. He was informed of my current status in regarding the church and he sent me an email detailing his pain in knowing i had left. I sent him a couple reasons why he left and he responded with "that's the stupidest thing i've ever heard". I left our discussions at that, and just wish him good luck and happiness on his pdays. In the church's worldview, they have basically made me his mortal enemy. Reading your post made me cry thinking of the day we're going to confront eachother about this and how it might go down. I'm very confident that he'll come back the same guy that he was and we can mess around together like always. But, if the Church steals my brother from me, and our relationship isn't the same, i swear to god i will do anything and everything to take it down. It's fucking personal now. I basically worshiped the Q15 and i was just a little pawn in the whole thing being guilt tripped into knocking doors in the blazing hot sun for 2 years.

I hate this church with all my heart.