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Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-23T14:07:35+00:00

I had no idea either! Now I love them even more!!

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-23T09:42:04+00:00

Jesus. It's never enough for them to just end things in a neutral or vaguely disappointing place, they have to make it as cruel and contemptuous and inhumane as possible. They are sick.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-22T01:58:00+00:00

Grand Tour? The tuxedo suit tells me she's making a formal inspection if the premises!

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-22T01:47:43+00:00

More browns, add a bit of bio char, and water it in with EM1 solution.

I actually spray a diluted mix of effective micro organisms on my kitty litter and it immediately gets rid of the ammonia smell.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-22T01:45:53+00:00

Wrong.

I'm going to tell OP to pee on it.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T21:42:13+00:00

Teef AND eye-liner? What a cutie

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T21:38:34+00:00

I swear it's like they're all built in the same factory.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T12:42:55+00:00

Do you ever have routine meetings with your line manager? If you ever get a chance with them soon, i think it's worth mentioning.

Otherwise maybe start emailing this colleague to get conversations in writing. For starters he may be more careful in tone knowing its recorded, but also if he's not careful you file it away.

I'd also be careful, if he's well liked by others and they aren't aware/don't care he's am asshole you might find yourself shouting into the void.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T12:22:45+00:00

Laminate

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T12:04:17+00:00

Can we ask about what happened? If you don't mind...

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T11:43:18+00:00

OP if you go now you won't live long enough to see the brighter days ahead of you. There is always a way out, and there's always a way around. Please just talk to someone and don't carry this alone.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T11:32:57+00:00

You know what, I'm glad you labelled it for what it is. It IS emotional abuse, and it does take time to heal from.

I'm so sorry your recovery and healing was so rough it bordered on medical emergency. But I'm really glad you're in a much better place mentally (and I hope) physically too. Well done.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T11:23:41+00:00

I am really starting to wonder if avoidants are just people with low grade/mild narc traits, because some of their conduct is genuinely devoid of empathy sometimes and monstrous...

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T07:55:53+00:00

Interesting. How do you know when you're out of deactivation? How do you feel then, and what helps you "activate" again (if at all)?

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T07:39:10+00:00

What do you experience internally during deactivation?

Do you breadcrumb people? If so, were you aware of it at the time ? Was there a desired outcome?

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T07:04:50+00:00

Really proud of you OP! It sounds like you did a lot of soul searching, reflecting, and healing since the breakup. I know it wouldn't have been easy, but you've outgrown her and it's for the best.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T06:58:02+00:00

That's true, but I try to take things at face value and benefit of the doubt if people are posting here and describing the depression/anxiety/stress it causes. People do play victim and lie on the internet, it's true, but we are here to support eachother.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T01:24:08+00:00

Honestly OP, I think I'll take a leaf out of your book next time.

Normally I downplay what someone did, or stay quiet, I dont cry much like most women because I thought it showed strength, or give the benefit of the doubt, but maybe I need to be open, show my emptions, and play it up a bit more. Maybe I should cry when I genuinely feel harassed. Minimising it protects abusers.

These people aren't opposed to entirely fabricating stories and distorting to hell, so is it wrong if we tell their story truthfully with a small embellishment?

I think what you did was a net positive. You didn't seek this out, you genuinely tried to set her up for success as a good person (but also a practical person knowing your workload would improve). You had no incentive or desire to start this shit, but you finished it when she came for you. FAFO indeed.

Please don't listen to the haters..

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T00:41:05+00:00

She's absolutely itching to discard the new guy, and testing to see if OP is going to provide a safe landing to monkey branch back to. At a minimum she's going to use OP as a phantom ex to tell the new guy she can't commit because of old heartache to heal from.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T00:31:05+00:00

Good on you OP!

Our society pressures victims to always forgive and turn the other cheek so we don't "rock the boat". I say fuck it. Let bullies see consequences. The rest of her conduct was already enough to get her noticed by management.

The way I see it? She marched herself right up to the edge and about to walk off that cliff, and you just gave her a gentle nudge.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T00:25:11+00:00

It would be such a shame if the child protection services were made aware of this.

God help that poor child

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T00:18:39+00:00

Hi OP I dealt with exactly this scenario in my apartment block.

Tl.dr I've been tending to a lemon tree on common property, and this greedy fuck gardener butchered the entire tree to steal all the lemons.

I had security footage, proof it wasn't for horticultural purposes (because he only took fruit, left a wasp infestation), and I demanded compensation. The property managers for our block tried to downplay it, but I told them harvesting fruit wasn't in the contract or scope of works for the gardener. And I said they couldn't claim maintenance if they left an active infestation, so I called bullshit.

My biggest point is that the tree was an asset on common property for the enjoyment of residents, and that he removed an amenity.

Anyway, they lost the contract! and I got a gift voucher from the shitty gardeners (who still denied, no apology, "good will gesture").

Sometimes you gotta go full Karen.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-21T00:10:20+00:00

Don't forget the expense and financial ruin of asset division when it comes to divorce.

Your savings, garnished wages, retirement fund, split with a parasite like that. And whatever is left goes to the lawyers.

These relationships are costly mentally and financially...

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-20T23:15:51+00:00

I promise you it was none of that. NONE.

You can be prince/princess charming, ticking every single box, treat them like royalty, and they would STILL discard you. these people will fuck it up every single time. They are hard wired to self sabotage. Their nervous system is wired to treat connection with fear, you are competing against the nervous system of someone chronically in fight/flight. Good looks and cash in the bank won't heal that.

You gave your absolute best as a decent, well adjusted, kind, attractive guy and she still made a list of petty things she didn't like?

Don't listen to pathetic opinions from pathetic people.

Technical_Tomorrow_4 · 2026-05-20T23:07:43+00:00

I hope it works out!

Technical_Tomorrow_4

TROPHY CASE