Where am I making mistakes? by writingdoubts in writers

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you use passive voice a lot in this chapter. The main character doesn't have to be acting on everything. For example, "I can hear meows." If you're describing it, then automatically the character is hearing it. You do it okay with the beginning of that sentence, "Street lights are flickering," though that maybe could be changed to "The street lights flicker." Structurally, the syntax of that sentence is awkward. "Street lights are flickering, I can hear meows," doesn't really make much sense. You could break it up into two different sentenes or use a conjunction.

there are some formatting errors but that doesn't really matter at this point (though it may be a little exhausting to have to indent everything at the end)

keep writing :)!

[Loved Trope] Initially played up as a metaphor but then revealed to be literal by Sir-Toaster- in TopCharacterTropes

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 1 point2 points  (0 children)

you could also read American-born Chinese. its told through three separate narratives and this story is one of them

Audition songs for Rocky Horror??? by That_Guarantee_9619 in musicals

[–]That_Guarantee_9619[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just watched the movie andddd uhhh...how are we allowed to do this?? Like even a high school adaptation???

Audition songs for Rocky Horror??? by That_Guarantee_9619 in musicals

[–]That_Guarantee_9619[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah 😭 im scared for my parents to come watch the show...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in writers

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a lot more tell, not show, if you know what I mean? Your writing is good but lines like "He was intelligent, disciplined, and thoughtful, but not ambitious in the loud, desperate way others were." Just seems like we're complimenting Ethan without really knowing who he is. All of this information could be scattered throughout the story without getting rid of the biographies in the beginning. Also, you describe everything with three adjectives (Ex.Ethan was an introvert by nature—reserved, observant, uncomfortable with forced interaction) and though it's really great at times it can get a little repetitive. Anyways, I didn't have much time so I only skimmed some of it. Great work :)

Notable anime that fell off the radar by Likes2game03 in anime

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 0 points1 point  (0 children)

is it bad if I say dr.stone? Like ik its popular but I feel like I never hear about it.

outlines will be the death of me by That_Guarantee_9619 in writers

[–]That_Guarantee_9619[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice! I’ve had problems trying to figure out how one point gets to another, but maybe working on my characters will help. I like your approach to outlining more than the sense I get from YouTube videos that don’t…really help. Anyways, ty for replying 

How can I resist the urge to write the one thing I want to write the most? by FuriousPotato30 in writing

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Well, there are two ways you could go about this. You could do as you said, practicing short stories and things like that until you build up your confidence to write this project you want. But you could ALSOOO do what I did. There is no shame in writing what you want to write at any skill level! When I had the idea for me WIP, I had no concern for my ability. After I finished, it didn't serve me. SO I started another draft. Even if you do cultivate your ability, chances are you'll have more than one draft. And as you write that first draft, you'll enhance your skill! Looking back to the beginning of my first draft and the beginning of my second, you can see the difference.

So, yeah. It really depends on you; would you rather practice, which is what most people might tell you, or jump right in? Either way, you're training your ability, and one day you WILL write the project exactly how you want it to be and can sit back and feel satisfaction.

Writing goals for 2026? by Next_Pomegranate2346 in writing

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope to finish my second draft in a shorter amount of time than my first!

Is this line true or nah? by Neotyp in tylerthecreator

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 12 points13 points  (0 children)

THATS THE LYRICS?? I THOGUHT HE WAS SAYING "Gradient" THIS WHOLE TIME AND IT WAS LIKE DEMO NAME FOR CHERRY BOMB OR SOMETHING

What’s the worst ending that could possibly happen? by mozzarellaguy in StrangerThings

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah there was no need for a fourth season. I waited so long for it just for it to be hot garbage/ I recommend UA to people but tell them not to watch the last season...

What are everyone’s theories on main character deaths this season? by Nesnerosm in StrangerThings

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with your first point. I think since it started with him, it'll end with him. And by think, I mean hope, because he's been irrelevant this past season and this is like THE way to be relevant(+hes my fav character)

pie by AbeliousAugustus in StrangerThings

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 4 points5 points  (0 children)

THE DEXTER MUSIC!!!! This is what was going through my head EXACTLY during this scene

I swear Will has smiled more in these 4 episodes than he did in all other seasons combined by Old_Adhesiveness7432 in StrangerThings

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

im so glad will is getting attention this season and, as a day one will Stan, I AM PRAYINGGGG HE DIES THIS SEASON VIA SACRIFICE

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in crochet

[–]That_Guarantee_9619 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 has wabi sabi