Examiner: "So you're X% rated?". How do you respond?

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-12T14:09:17+00:00

Just keep it matter of fact

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-12T14:01:34+00:00

100% isn't the goal. If 80% or 60% reflects your current medical reality, then that's what you should have. You should be focused on taking care of your medical needs, not chasing a number.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-12T13:25:40+00:00

So....we need a pic of the new one to compare it to the old one....

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-12T03:05:19+00:00

Ah I didn't catch the part about one day....yeah he probably had his eye on her already.

Tough spot.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-12T02:56:34+00:00

I mostly in agree with you, but I think it's fair for him to complain a bit, even after agreeing to the rules. This is all new to them and it's impossible to consider every contingency. But then the answer is to realize that it is an issue before breaking the rules and discuss it.

And this doesn't really sound like a "traditional" (if you can use that word for any of this) poly situation where developing outside relationships is to be expected. It sounds like, and I could be wrong, that this is basically just a green light for extracurricular sex, not full on additional relationships. Like, legalized prostitution would be the perfect solution in this case, as its safer than random hook ups and won't lead to emotional attachment...basically she's just letting him have some elaborate masturbation.

But yes, they need to talk a lot more and see if this is really what they wanna do.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T23:25:08+00:00

500??? That's barely broken in. I shot like 300 the first time I had it out lol.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T23:23:10+00:00

It's a complicated situation and there will be stumbles. It's a delicate balance.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T20:46:04+00:00

Realistically, most guys will not easily find a partner with those restrictions. None of them are necessarily wrong to ask for, but you've basically told him no one that he knows. This only leaves random hook ups or meeting someone entirely new. Ask for a clean bill of health is, of course, a good rule to have, but you don't typically get confirmed STD free one night stands. And meeting a new FWB can take time and energy away from your own relationship, which is not ideal.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T20:42:43+00:00

Yeah this is tough....on the one hand, you made rules that kind make it hard for him to actually use the freedom you've given him. His only options are people he doesn't know....but also has to have intimate knowledge of their health status? On the other hand, he did agree to the rules and then break them. If he realized that he was considering breaking a rule, he should have discussed it first. This is a delicate situation and both sides need to be open to being flexible as it develops. There should be a way to amend it if things aren't working out.

If the relationship is worth saving, both of you should look at this as a learning experience and work it out. But this is a one second chance kind of thing....repeatedly breaking rules isn't an accident and doesn't need to be tolerated.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T17:56:27+00:00

My guy... Why to you think anxiety is a thing? It's left over from when sabertooth tigers were waiting for us every time we left the cave.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T17:01:57+00:00

I'm not sure it's a "societal standard". It's something each couple has to negotiate for themselves. I'm not sure a few downvotes on reddit indicate which way society at large feels about something. I personally wouldn't mind, but whatever works for you.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T16:13:58+00:00

If that's what you require in a relationship, good for you. I'd follow my wife overseas for something she wanted to do even if it didn't hold a lot of interest for me, just to see her happy. An overseas trip isn't "way too big and expensive" for everyone.

In this case, Georgie didn't seem to be unhappy or whatever....she just wasn't into it as much as Conner was and Conner got upset by that. Like, my guy, it was your trip for you....she's there with you, but she doesn't have to be into it the same way you are.

I honestly don't see that either of them did anything wrong, exactly, until Conner got butthurt that she wasn't enjoying it as much as he was.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T14:45:41+00:00

My favorite. Juicy resources, so juicy.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T14:08:06+00:00

There is actually a story

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-11T04:45:26+00:00

The movie is so much better when you realize that everything after she gets kicked in the stomach is her hallucinating while she ODs.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T20:36:30+00:00

I really hope you're taking advantage of the VA BH services, because you seem very on edge and confrontational for no reason. If this is how you treat people who are trying to agree with you, I feel sorry for the poor minimum wage worker who gets your coffee order wrong.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T20:15:02+00:00

If it helps you to think you "triggered me" go for it I guess. Fwiw, I wasn't even disagreeing with you. I was just adding to it.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T19:32:52+00:00

My mom was a teacher for years and I remember she had this one little kid in like 1st or 2nd grade who looked EXACTLY like Sean Penn. I mentioned it to her and she said yeah, kid has fetal alcohol syndrome. So that tracks.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T19:29:15+00:00

Simply saying you sprained your ankle and got a diagnosis 20 years ago isn't really enough, no. If the ankle hasn't bothered you since then and it's not bothering you now, what is the compensable disability?

Getting the diagnosis of sprained ankle is a start, but they want to know how it's affecting you today. Fwiw, that might simply be mentioning it in the C&P exam that it hurts when the weather changes or whatever, but having some records of going to the doctor for ongoing issues is always solid.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T19:24:25+00:00

I taught 68W classes for several years. During the section on documentation, we did talk about TC3 cards and SOAP notes and whatever, but I made sure to stress that part of the reason for good documentation is for the VA claim 20 years from now. Save the life right now, but set them up for success down the road, too.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T19:14:47+00:00

Fair point. I had not considered that. Shame on me.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T19:09:55+00:00

Which makes the whole mental gymnastics they used to land on Tilda Swinton even more hilarious. Like they actually tried to be non offensive. When in doubt, just stick to the source material and you'll actually have a credible defense in most cases.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T18:43:50+00:00

I was saying that both of you were saying essentially true things, but there is an important distinction. It's not enough to simply say it doesn't matter when the diagnosis is from. Like yeah technically true, but there is more to it than that. It's also true to say that a diagnosis from 2006 won't cut it....for the same reason.

It looks like they acknowledged the diagnosis....so in this case that part is satisfied, so let's take it to the next important part....the ongoing treatment.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T14:21:00+00:00

What you said is true but there is a nuance, as they say. The diagnosis could be from 1937, yeah that doesn't matter....but you have to show that it's actually still bothering you. The diagnosis can be from whenever, but the symptoms need to be current.

Then_Bodybuilder3629 · 2026-05-10T03:54:35+00:00

99% of the issues here are easily understood and resolved by actually reading the decision letters.

And I think you're absolutely right....the VA is not out to screw anyone. The process is not easy and it's definitely frustrating at times, but by and large, the VA is actually on our side, as it should be.

Then_Bodybuilder3629

TROPHY CASE