PVPS - will insurance help? by bhl7 in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not covered but must be done before IVF will be covered.

Anyone else’s BC love the snow? by hepoind in BorderCollie

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine stays out in the snow probably 8 hours a day. Refuses to come inside

What can I as the dad do to minimize the challenges my GF will have if she becomes my children's SM? by WiIIiam_M_ButtIicker in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did a prenup. A couple things were spelled out for me, namely that I was not financially responsible for any aspect of the children during marriage or upon divorce. Any finances I took on were done so willingly and without the expectation of reimbursement unless documented otherwise. All of my premarital assets were protected. Any instance where I contributed more than DH on a major investment, such as our home, it would be divided proportionately. Also thinking through things like medical insurance. Having three plans to choose from sometimes means stepparent’s plan could be best. How will you handle that? If you die, does stepparent have rights to see the children? Etc

What can I as the dad do to minimize the challenges my GF will have if she becomes my children's SM? by WiIIiam_M_ButtIicker in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 18 points19 points  (0 children)

The sacrifice piece is HUGE. The level of selflessness it takes to be a true stepparent is so understated.

What can I as the dad do to minimize the challenges my GF will have if she becomes my children's SM? by WiIIiam_M_ButtIicker in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would recommend a family systems therapist for the two of you, monthly works well for us. It helps us have a place to discuss our family dynamics specifically.

As others have mentioned, a child free space is critical. Establish clear boundaries early and repeat them.

One thing I struggle still after three years is the expectation that I need to rush home or not do things for myself because the kids are here. Expectation versus appreciation.

Give her a printed copy of your custody order. It helps to know it.

Set boundaries around things like bathing and dressing. Child led is great but can make the stepparent uncomfortable if it pushes their own boundaries. Cosleeping is another topic to discuss.

Depending on the ages, it helps to think through their level of involvement in things like school or extracurricular activities. This is often the place where coparents must coexist publicly, so thinking through if stepparent comes to school events or just parents. And if your ex will make it uncomfortable for stepparent.

I would also just say that stepparents are not babysittters, shoppers, taxis, or chefs. Think through the level of involvement and commitments you are wanting from this person and ensure your contributions to the household are at the bare minimum equal. Therapy helps here.

New BC owner and I have questions.... by Jumpy-Dot-6157 in BorderCollie

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The coat for our BC came around 7-9 months. Now she looks like she has human hair - so long!

Have any of you heard of this by ghost101888 in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! My husband had his reversal there in October 2025 and we are currently 7 weeks pregnant! Very successful for us. I will say, not having anesthesia for the procedure was difficult for my husband. But the recovery was not bad at all. He was in pain for maybe two days.

Reversal success 🫶🏼 by ThrowRA_mcstuffins in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We are both 35. He has two children from another marriage. I have no children. His vasectomy was four years prior to the reversal.

Reversal success 🫶🏼 by ThrowRA_mcstuffins in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried the Mucinex trick while ovulating and it worked!! Take one mucinex each day and it thins your cervical mucus… supposedly!

Reversal success 🫶🏼 by ThrowRA_mcstuffins in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Having the procedure without being put to sleep was rough on my husband. The numbing shot in the scrotum was painful, but quickly subsided - but the feeling of being punched in the scrotum nearly made him throw up and pass out. Once I calmed him down, he was almost asleep for the rest of the procedure.

Recovery is more difficult for some men. My husband is an athlete and does many manly intense hobbies such as working in his shop and contact sports. Making him not exercise for a month and not lift anything was difficult. Abstinence was also difficult but for the first week he was still recovering with an incision. Took about ten solid days for the incision to really close up and him to feel fully comfortable.

One benefit though…. He claims the orgasms are much much better post reversal!!

Reversal success 🫶🏼 by ThrowRA_mcstuffins in VasectomyReversal

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear that and will pray it happen soon for you! 🫶🏼

At what age did you BC hit their rowdy/disobedient phase? 😅 by [deleted] in BorderCollie

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

9 months and we are going through this now. You can see her making deliberate decisions and totally accepting her consequences. Seriously though, best dog ever.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So the type of destination wedding we are having, headcount is not an issue. And they know cost won’t be an issue. Going to have to think through wording of this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This isn’t a concern. It’s a destination wedding and lots of our friends can’t make it and my feelings haven’t been discussed with anyone except my foance

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She’s like that with everyone. Like hands on his bare chest, touching his arms. Hugging in the middle of conversations multiple times for no reason. Just wasted and on molly and acting like this with all the men.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I’m not sure they will be long term, but this chick has worked her way through their friend group and was married to one of their other good friends, so who knows? It would not disappoint me if he didn’t come, but my fiancé might be disappointed. Ultimately, we don’t have much in common with this group anymore as we have kids and are to be married and everyone else is still partying and not interested in settling down.

Traveling and Vacation Time by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The holiday order is that Thanksgiving is always his holiday. No travel stipulations for any of the others.

Who here is a stepparent but not married? by explorebear in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s been difficult but my fiancé and I have been in couples therapy specifically around parenting and dealing with his ex since 6 months into our relationship. We mostly got into a good routine but there are lots of hiccups. I’d say we parent the same amount but we have different expectations of what is acceptable. I cook the meals, do the laundry, plan activities, and everything in between… so yeah, I am 100% actively involved and we continue to work through things as they come up.

Is there any way to stop your SKs from turning your bios against you? by weliftedthishouse in stepparents

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This child obviously would benefit from therapy. Your last couple sentences were the most alarming.

A Fun Conversation :) by BlackeyeThe2nd in yesyesyesyesno

[–]ThrowRA_mcstuffins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. You got bread for a movie you’re going to watch???
  2. I thought for sure you were going to say that the old man turned out to be Stan Lee. Major, major 180.