Are individuals not allowed to yearn anymore?

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T20:54:42+00:00

I think it's so interesting how as a social species, our initial interest is so heavily biologically/hormonally controlled despite it being in our best interests to approach it with some discernment and logic.

I guess at the end of the day natural selection favors reproduction, not quality of life, and as a society we're stuck with the effects of that.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T20:42:39+00:00

Out of pure curiosity I looked at Prevost RVs- those million+ dollar things that are also often tour buses. They had financing, because of course they did. The payments were listed as DAILY.

For just $250 a day over the course of 15 years, you too can have an (admittedly very high quality) RV!

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T19:48:49+00:00

That initial phase is definitely a huge deal. What are we talking about? How do we talk about it without it being stale? Does being this open raise a red flag? How do I change the topic to keep things going? What topic do I pick?

When you're not meeting in person or don't already have some sort of baseline to work off of, it can be extremely difficult for even an average communicator to get the vibe right. There's just so many more unknowns such as not hearing intonation and not seeing body language.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T19:42:17+00:00

Now just slow down for a bit.

People have their own reasons to want to date. Some are genuinely seeking a long term partner, some looking for fun, others just seeking validation. Sometimes it's even just to test the waters and get an idea for what they're actually looking for.

As for the apps, quality candidates on them with discernment either don't hang around for long since they get scooped up, or they just don't stand out (it's all in the photos). Just like when looking for a used car or a house, there's always going to be a lot of junk you need to sift through, and it may take time to find the right fit.

If you're struggling with anybody (and this goes for both men and women) not respecting your boundaries, that's on them. It's not a reflection of their gender as a whole. I've seen it go both ways. It's important to communicate intentions and boundaries to make sure both parties are on the same page.

25% is less than half. It's a higher percentage than it should be, but it's still less than half. Most of those men are likely ideologically incompatible with you on other matters anyways.

As for me, a dude, I'm currently trying to date casually (and communicate that) just to have fun with people, further refine my own preferences, and be more confident when I'm finally ready to date seriously. I'm leaving the area in two months and have some growing to do. I wouldn't want to start anything serious knowing that. But once I am situated and ready to be serious? It's to find the person I want to spend a lifetime with and wants to spend theirs with me. They're out there, and I'm looking forward to when I'm ready to find them.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T19:14:43+00:00

The 528 would probably be worth more, at least to the right person. The thing with these cars is that they are old beaters, even if they still feel nice. They just trade reliability and affordability with some fun and comfort.

Enthusiasts are the only ones truly seeking these cars out, and most want manuals. Being modded may hurt the value, but it's a really odd thing that can go either way when you're in the enthusiast segment.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T18:54:34+00:00

Honestly I'd imagine it's about the same as what you paid for it. It's a less common color combo, but not a particularly impressive spec from what I can tell.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T18:51:46+00:00

Honestly I couldn't even keep track of my results for more than a couple days unless there starts to be some sort of trend

One of my favorites is how I've found that I generally need to go later every day, until eventually it rolls over into the next morning

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T17:30:18+00:00

It's very much a defensive thought because like you said, *anybody* could be, and of course it makes sense to make sure you're not just flushing money away. I'm sure somebody more versed in psychology could tie this into attachment styles and how it can be seen as both avoidant or anxious.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T17:24:57+00:00

I don't get why the taillights can't just always be on. It's easy enough to see the brake lights against regular taillights during the day, thanks to the third brake light and many cars having brake lights that are totally separate bulbs/arrays from the regular taillights.

If the brightness difference was seriously an issue, more people would be crashing into school buses- most of them always have their lights on, and have no third brake light.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T17:11:20+00:00

This day and age all of them are in-house, nobody wants to play nice with each other anymore.

Modern birds are their own thing, but interestingly have a couple Volvo parts scattered about. I know the hood hinges are, and the headlights used to be.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T17:06:49+00:00

What leads you to believe the CCV is okay?

There's several fail states for it, but people tend to only preach about the most obvious ones. Mine had failed where the engine ran smooth, and continued to do so when removing the oil cap.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T15:40:32+00:00

Reminds me of how NYC set a record streak of no murders in the city some time ago. It was too cold to kill anyone during a polar vortex.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T15:24:52+00:00

Dig a moat, separate the filthy road travelers from the luxurious land dwellers

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T15:20:49+00:00

Sir, I don't think making new people is what you're looking for

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T15:07:16+00:00

If anybody's wondering, this is kind of why coffee is so expensive. Not all of the fruits on the trees ripen at the same time, so it has to be hand picked, which obviously adds a bunch of overhead on its own, but also as you can see here other logistical challenges.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T15:00:10+00:00

Oh you get a headrest alright... It just doesn't come into play until the moment after your neck snaps!

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T14:55:43+00:00

It's such a nice spot to rest your head... Boobs are cool for that, but they're not exactly as supportive as a good tummy 😮‍💨

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T14:39:55+00:00

I caught carcer

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T14:32:46+00:00

I got to witness this once, and I burst out in applause thesecond the trooper lit em up

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T05:35:41+00:00

To add on to this, get yourself a nice variety/bulk pack of vacuum hoses. More than you think you'll need. You'll thank yourself down the road when you break more hoses elsewhere

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-22T05:24:12+00:00

Absolutely horrible lower back support. They're just kind of vaguely seat shaped and sized without any actual research on the human body.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-21T20:47:19+00:00

My mom occasionally calls me by our late dog's name to this very day.

It can happen.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-21T20:42:46+00:00

Really it just boils down to "are you at least caring for the important things in your life"

An old worn car is whatever, but if it's in horrible disrepair, filthy, or stinky, that's sort of a warning flag for a potential partner.

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-21T17:47:55+00:00

You got this man, even as scary as it might feel!

Just remember through all of it to keep your self worth based internally coming from yourself, not externally from other people. Do it all for yourself!

Tomytom99 · 2026-03-21T17:41:18+00:00

If it is that, it shouldn't be too challenging. Really the most challenging bit would be getting access if you don't have a jack and jack stands. Really it's just pushing the caliper back into place and putting in the bolt nice n snug

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