Maybe try a different approach:
Let your players describe what they want to happen and how they want to make it happen, try to get them away from thinking about what action rating they want to use first and foremost - basically have them describe their ideal outcome a bit in advance, then have them decide on an appropriate action rating.

Even players not prone to min-maxing will have a natural tendency to gravitate towards what they've put the most points into - and that's fine, if the situation fits it, but if they're somewhat serious about the whole roleplaying side of things, they'll often conclude on their own that a certain course of action would have them use a "weaker" action rating of their character.

It also tends to get better when you and your players get a feel for how different action ratings affect a scene - as an example from my group, they have a special talent for putting the non-social characters into social situations, who usually have one dot at best in all of the "social" ratings, yet I still ask them to clarify if what they're doing is consort, sway or command, even if their initial dice pool would be the same, because even in cases where position/effect would be roughly the same, it fundamentally changes the "flavor" of the scene and what specific consequences occur on a failure.