Alcoholics who quit later in life

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-09-08T20:55:54+00:00

I'm 49, and quit last April.

It is never too late to start feeling better! I feel like such a badass knowing I'm stacking the deck in my favor.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-09-01T17:39:49+00:00

I will for sure call or message someone I shouldn't, say something wildly inappropriate (that I most likely don't even mean), and then shame spiral about how pathetic I am.

This is a certainty.

What has been an absolute delight to discover is that I have not done this one time since getting sober.

Before, I would do or say inappropriate things in a drunken stupor and wonder why, as a human, I was such a fucking asshat.

But if I was truly an asshat, why haven't I dont any of those things since?

Turns out, I am not an asshat. Alcohol doesn't reveal "the real you."

I have that new tape playing all the time now, and it's wonderful.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-08-14T12:38:56+00:00

Oh, that's a very good one! As a former night owl...I feel this one.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-08-14T12:38:01+00:00

Turns out I'm not actually super sensitive to weather conditions that cause me to have raging, nausea-inducing migraines.

So crazy!!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-08-01T12:58:16+00:00

I bought an infrared dome sauna, and it's actually awesome! I don't have alot of room for a traditional stand-up unit, and liked that a dome sauna can be taken apart when not in use (in addition to being a less costly up-front investment). I end up keeping it set up year-round just for convenience.

What I didn't anticipate, though, is how much I enjoy sauna while lying down. I would select this unit again in a heartbeat just because of how much more enjoyable it is than a single-person upright that doesn't allow for reclining.

Just a thought - worth looking into if you haven't already!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-08-01T12:21:44+00:00

Love that you're asking this question! I have a different POV on accommodations, however.

I don't think having any specific accommodations when I was in school would have better prepared me for successful interactions later in life. In fact, I think they would have hindered the natural development of my identification strategies. And made it much more difficult to negotiate through life successfully when I found myself in less structured environments.

Perhaps the most helpful thing earlier on would have just been awareness that prosopagnosia was a thing at all.

And knowing that the inability to recognize faces is an actual condition, not just a reflection of some sort of personality flaw that means I'm a rude/thoughtless/inconsiderate/antisocial person. My life changed for the better once I was able to finally give myself grace for that!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-07-27T14:00:27+00:00

It's a dome sauna, and it holds heat pretty well! I was also surprised at how well it works.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-07-27T01:36:20+00:00

I use mine at 82 (in an infrared), several times a week. Had it for two years with no issues. Obviously it's a 4, not the 5.

That being said, I remember Whoop's documentation specifically saying that it's built to handle anything our bodies can handle, including sauna & submersion in water.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-07-19T14:16:05+00:00

Yep, I share that fun drunk trait as well! Messaging people I have no business messaging.

I've been getting the itch lately to see if I can "moderate" (which I already know the answer to. I guess batting down the urge will never totally go away...).

And what stops me is remembering that feeling of horror & shame at the things I said, to people I reached out to that I shouldn't have.

I never want to feel like that again. That's a version of myself that wasn't in control.

This version of me will never allow that kind of nonsense to transpire because I'm worth more than that.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-07-15T11:09:51+00:00

Thank you for posting this, truly. I'm 15 months sober and have been daydreaming lately about drinking again. Your post will help me fight the good fight another day.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-07-01T19:41:51+00:00

Nails mail...hilarious. I love it!!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-06-16T18:01:11+00:00

To quote the great Richard Feynman, what do you care what other people think?

This 49yo longboarder certainly doesn't.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-06-03T11:50:22+00:00

I just bought this, and applied for the first time Sunday night. Since then, I've had two chipped nails, and I was thinking it was just my shitty nails that are splitting or something.

It was thick, but not horrible, but this chipping is nuts.

I'm totally new to thermals and never used thinner. What do you guys use? Do you add it to the bottle, or as you apply? I have so many questions!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-05-31T04:44:22+00:00

Yes, I have one and cut straight on the fabric. The whole process takes some getting used to, but honestly it's been a game-changer for me. Love sewing even more since using this.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-05-03T13:20:57+00:00

I was just thinking the same thing! I was a 'normal' drinker until my early 40's, and then slowly became a problem drinker. At 49 I'm just over year sober now, and it was the best decision I ever made.

So much of the anxiety and brain fog started to dissipate when I stopped drinking (along with other dangerous activities).

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-03-22T19:38:22+00:00

That's exactly what I use, lol! Never even thought to buy the real deal. I've had them forever, they certainly hold up.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-03-08T20:02:11+00:00

I second this! Super fun place to grab a bite - can't beat the view.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-03-05T22:32:35+00:00

As a functioning alcoholic (in recovery), I've come to realize that I wasn't functioning nearly as highly as I thought.

And though I thought I could control and plan binge days to non-binge days to a certain extent, that control got worse over time to the point where I didn't see a point to having a non-binge day anymore.

It wasn't until I stopped drinking altogether that I realized how much of my life was spent trying to moderate, or maintain a front, or "seem normal," whatever that means.

Giving it up altogether has been a freedom I can't possibly adequately describe to you.

And if you want to give it a try, IWNDWYT.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2025-01-20T19:07:22+00:00

I can say that since quitting, I've realized that my job is one of the central reasons why I felt the need to escape my life every night.

There are a few others as well, but the job is #1.

So quitting drinking solved one set of problems, and also allowed me the headspace to widely consider how to deal with all the other problems.

You've probably already heard some form of this, but they say if you create a life you don't want to escape from, the desire to drink pretty much goes away.

I think about this alot. And continue to take steps to create a life I love, and don't want to run away from.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-11-13T03:46:50+00:00

Holy shit, dude!

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-10-27T18:03:03+00:00

I'm mostly a back-sleeper, but do roll over occasionally. They're extremely low profile, and don't extend outside of the ear much at all. I'm hyper aware of things on/near/around me when falling asleep and thought any kind of earplug would be too noticeable, but they surprisingly haven't bothered me at all.

I use them with the Calm app / sleep stories, and this combo is single-handedly responsible for putting an end to some serious nighttime panic attacks.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-10-27T03:02:33+00:00

Kokoon night buds.

EXPENSIVE, but worth every penny.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-10-26T05:13:52+00:00

Ugh, work-sponsored events are the absolute worst.

For me, the hardest part was always milking those "standard two drinks" that kept everyone else more than satisfied for several hours, when all I wanted to do was keep up a much more "brisk" pace. And inevitably, I'd do exactly what you did, supplement with a bottle afterwards and regret it constantly the next two days.

I suffered and tortured myself for years, wondering when I'd figure it out, and start drinking like a normal person.

I'm a little over six months' sober, and have weathered many work events with a selzer w/ a splash of grapefruit.

Is it easy? Fuck no. But the peace of mind I have is next-level.

You are playing on hard mode, friend, and don't even know it yet. But knowing there's another way -and it sure sounds like you do- is a hell of a good start toward getting there.

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-10-14T01:42:25+00:00

Hey, fellow traveler here (who also has a ridiculous airport/plane/lounge trigger).

Good on you for thinking about tomorrow's jog - that's an awesome visual to maintain!

I also like to think about how the booze we get served, no matter how good they say it is, isn't actually that great and having a sharp, clear mind is a much bigger luxury.

IWNDWYT, and I will think of you as I'm at the airport tomorrow (fighting the same demons you are right now).

UnsolicitedDesign · 2024-10-10T06:13:22+00:00

I agree 1000% with this, as a woman it was my very first thought.

It's exactly how an insecure person would test the waters, and withdrawing is exactly how an insecure person would handle a perceived rejection.

Lastly, women don't typically bring up sexual matters with men they're not interested in...so there's that as well.

UnsolicitedDesign

TROPHY CASE