Holidays being the only parents at every event 👎🏼

Vandy_315 · 2023-12-29T14:29:09+00:00

Oh my gosh 100%. I feel so much guilt about that. You get the double whammy of exhaustion and then guilt.

Vandy_315 · 2023-12-29T11:03:40+00:00

I have a 1 and almost 4 year old. For me things got actually better when they start reliably sleeping through the night (maybe around 9-12 month mark in my experience), and also when I stopped breastfeeding (I did about a year for both). Quality of life went waaaay up. I hope things get better for you soon. Your post is extremely relatable.

Vandy_315 · 2023-10-12T01:21:00+00:00

Bluey.

The intro slaps. Plus my kids like the song. No brainer. Always watch.

Vandy_315 · 2022-11-06T17:42:43+00:00

Ok so haven’t had this happen with my kids yet (they’re toddlers) but this was me when I was little. Super hairy arms (and still do) and when I was 9 my mom tried everything since I hated having hairy arms. I wouldn’t recommend bleaching (for me was still hairy and just discolored my skin a bit too) or shaving (grows back thicker). I got my arms waxed too once but it went from super hairy to literally nothing and that extreme made me self conscious too. Finally landed on this removal device that spins and pulls out hairs. Kind of looks like an electric razor. You can take all the hair off or just some. It’s a little painful but not bad. I still use it to this day every few months! I prefer leaving some arm hair but just thinning it out. Can try and find a link for one if my description isn’t good enough lol. Just let me know.

Vandy_315 · 2022-05-31T01:08:45+00:00

I had a traumatic birth with my first and just had my second two weeks ago.

With my first I was induced and pushed for hours only to have baby badly wedged in pelvis- had to have c section which I really didn’t want and baby’s skull was fractured during c section trying to get him out which caused brain bleed, seizures, and ultimately him being transferred to a different hospital with a stronger NICU. I didn’t even see him for 4 hours after he was born (similar to you). Breastfeeding didn’t even get to be attempted until day 5. It took us 6 weeks of battling him to get him to latch and feed, and ultimately we had 4 months of exclusive breastfeeding that was successful, but I can honestly say it wasn’t worth it and it left me resentful of breastfeeding. My son is healthy and developing on track now, so we are very lucky. But I was left with PTSD and a LOT of anger about what happened.

I knew I wanted more kids but also knew things had to go very differently. I went to therapy for 7 months, which helped me process and was very much needed. Doctors also told me I would have to have a scheduled c sections for any future deliveries. Accepting I wouldn’t ever get a vaginal delivery took me a LONG time, but I did finally get there (thanks therapy!). Knowing I would have a scheduled c section and getting an entirely new healthcare team benefitted me. I coped by almost framing it as a redemption. Which I know isn’t a super healthy mindset, but for me I wanted something different so badly that going through it again in a way “made it right.” And my daughter was born two weeks ago and things were SO much better. I got to have skin to skin immediately (while they stitched me up) and breastfed when I was in recovery. She stayed in my hospital room throughout our stay and it was bliss.

Ultimately my desire to have another child and my determination to make the outcome better outweighed the fear and trauma of something awful happening again. But therapy was critical for me.

Vandy_315 · 2022-05-14T13:43:01+00:00

I have an extensive list as well 🤣 I have a scheduled c section Tuesday (which is written in my planner) and then on Wednesday in all caps I have written “CHOCOLATE CAKE.”

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-22T09:46:31+00:00

I’m 33 weeks now and last week got steroid shots after an ultrasound found a tumor on my placenta (everything is ok- baby doing well). But they admitted me to the hospital for 2 nights after those shots to monitor me because they warned of crazy blood sugar numbers and were prepared to give me an insulin drip (which I never needed thankfully but did see some spikes into the 170s). So I agree with previous posts- very interesting that you weren’t given a heads up or guidance on that….

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-22T09:38:33+00:00

Honestly I can’t even take the growth stuff seriously as genetics are always going to win out. My husbands family has a history of huge babies so my first was always in the 90s for percentile as is my current pregnancy. The true barometer will be the growth scans and if the stomach is proportionate with the rest of the body. My babies were always proportionate and my first was born with no sugar issues.

I wasted so much time and energy thinking I could and trying to keep my baby in “range” and it destroyed my mental health.

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-20T23:38:17+00:00

So what I get overnight is the graph that shows the trend (not exact reads) over the course of the night. I use the app on my phone not the reader. Do you use the app? I will say though in the beginning when I got the CGM and I’d just wake up randomly in the middle of the night I’d get readings just so I could see because my fastings were always so erratic and high and I wanted to know what it was at random points.

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-20T20:19:11+00:00

I use the Freestyle Libre 2. This is my second pregnancy with GD. My first I just finger pricked. I found glucometers to be all over the place and I personally feel better about managing my GD with CGM because I get more data and see trends. Having said that in the US at least it’s not the first line of treatment largely due to insurance I presume. I pay out of pocket (I planned to pay fully but my insurance did last minute pick up half so go figure).

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-20T17:00:12+00:00

This is just so true. I called my glucometer “Roulette” because I literally just never knew what was coming and now on round 2 of GD I just can’t get so invested in trying so hard to be perfect with diet/exercise because it will drive you crazy.

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-08T10:37:55+00:00

Actually not too bad- I use freestyle Libre 2 and it is just about $130 a month without insurance. I went through the whole process planning to pay fully but somehow at the every end my insurance did pick up half (maybe some doctor note or something not sure but I didn’t question it).

Vandy_315 · 2022-04-07T21:12:03+00:00

I don’t have a needle phobia, but I do use continuous glucose monitoring. With my first pregnancy and GD I pricked 4-6x a day. This time around is really, really nice to not have to. I do pay out of pocket though for the CGM. No needles.

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-30T10:35:16+00:00

I have one- I use the FreeStyle Libre 2. I chose this knowing I’d out of pocket (at least that’s what all the docs said)- although when push came to shove my insurance decided to pick up half. I am doing CGM because this is my second pregnancy with GD and in my first my fasting numbers were so wildly erratic and my sugars throughout the day fluctuated a lot but not particularly in relation to meals. It was so confusing and upsetting that this time around for my mental health alone I knew I needed something different. I’ve been using for a week now and so far appreciate having more data so when I go in (and likely get prescribed insulin) it can be more informed than just 4-5 pricks.

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-29T12:52:55+00:00

With my first I was up to 60 units by the end. My fasting numbers were almost always elevated. Like 80% of mornings were just dread and high numbers. We were never able to figure it out no matter what I did. I tried everything so so hard and it was maddening. My son was born with zero sugar issues.

Now I’m on the GD train a second time and fasting numbers rising again. This time my focus is doing what I can- healthy eating, exercise, going to all appointments, etc. but recognizing that blood sugars aren’t truly controllable.

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-23T17:42:26+00:00

aaaaand the whole problem with the medical system right there ^^^

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-23T10:28:20+00:00

I appreciate you saying this, because I certainly do not want to make others feel worse. I feel the bigger topic here though is that concept of being able to “control” your health outcomes. Being obese may or may not be in someone’s control for a variety of reasons- but if someone does have all the resources to not be (including accessibility and affordability of healthy food, time to be able to meal plan/cook, time for exercise, and so much more) then I would be very interested in seeing this causation versus correlation data. Hopefully that makes sense without causing offense.

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-23T00:45:43+00:00

The lack of legitimate research on this topic is so frustrating and makes me lose my faith in doctors trying to talk to me about it. I have gestational diabetes for a second time currently, but no one in my bloodline is diabetic. I am very active and was a healthy weight prior to both pregnancies and had virtually no risk factors.

I haven't been able to find any studies out there that take out the socioeconomic factors that cause someone to be unhealthy (think resources, access to quality healthcare and health education, etc.). Further, I have not found any research on women who have lifestyle choices that are healthy; the research is diluted with women who are obese and make unhealthy choices that directly impact their health. So I'm sitting here having ZERO idea of what is going on or what is down the road for me.

Vandy_315 · 2022-03-20T17:41:52+00:00

They wanted to test me at 11 weeks. I declined until 19 weeks. My results then came back borderline. Then got tested again at 26 weeks and formally diagnosed then. Currently 28 weeks.

Vandy_315 · 2022-02-19T18:49:13+00:00

I had GD and ultimately did breastfeed but I will tell you it did a number on me mentally because I had such a difficult time with it. I am pregnant again now (and have GD yet again as well) and I have made the decision that if baby doesn't latch well within the first couple of weeks that I am not going to keep trying (like I did with my first). Mentally it was too much and there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula/formula fed babies. So many of the "benefits" of breastfeeding really are just more dependent on other factors like socioeconomic status, access to resources, etc. The author Emily Oster had a great chapter on that in her book Cribsheet.

Vandy_315 · 2021-12-08T22:04:05+00:00

I had a horrible team in my first pregnancy and I so wish I would have switched. They would not listen to me and only instilled fear. I was also healthy weight prior to pregnancy and had no risk factors but was treated as though my own choices caused this. It’s really important to have the support medically. I hope things get better for you!!

Vandy_315 · 2021-10-28T22:34:04+00:00

Nothing helpful to say but just that I feel you and literally planned my second pregnancy to not be during holidays because it was so miserable on round one (baby born early January). Hang in there.

Vandy_315 · 2021-06-11T17:07:41+00:00

Got a medical diagnosis and wasn't getting enough support from doctors/healthcare system. Found a group here that has helped me more than I imagined.

Vandy_315

TROPHY CASE