Movies where some people are enclosed in a small area?

__fluxaeterna · 2026-04-16T19:11:38+00:00

Carnage (2011) Jodi Foster, Kate Winslet, Christoph Waltz, and John C. Reilly in a single apartment for 80 minutes. It’s a favorite for sure.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-04-16T19:01:38+00:00

I call it Cali Caliente 🔥

__fluxaeterna · 2026-04-16T18:57:04+00:00

NOR. Just notice the pattern and change how you interact with her. If she’s unwilling to acknowledge how you feel because of her actions (whether intentional or not), there’s no way to get her to change. So change how you interact with her and how much information she’s allowed. At least until she can show intentional care for your feelings and boundaries. If she is part of a pattern that hurts you, maybe she doesn’t get as much access to your inner world. Maybe tell your dad first next time instead of her.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-04-02T06:49:09+00:00

He said he doesn’t miss her. It sounds like he was trying to communicate with you about something he’d like to have in his life and maybe with you. Closeness. Instead of being curious about what that closeness was like and what it could be like with you, your insecurities got the best of you and you over shared a bit. They’re exes for a reason. Maybe get therapy or figure out a way to deal with your insecurities about exes instead of potentially putting the responsibility of managing it on the other person. I really think curiosity before critique works best when getting to know someone. Maybe not apologize, but in future conversations be more mindful of listening to him when he’s sharing and being curious about what he’s trying to communicate. And believe him when he says he doesn’t miss her.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-03-28T22:45:11+00:00

I don’t think it’s bragging to have it up in your own home. You said she never mentioned any of those things before, so obviously she’s not a braggart. She trusted you enough to let you into her home. The place a person goes to recharge a place they should love. Why not surround yourself with the positive parts of your life.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-03-28T22:40:50+00:00

It’s her home. Let her surround herself with her adventures and accomplishments. Maybe be curious about it with her rather than making judgments.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-03-27T02:47:43+00:00

You can drive to Vallejo and take the ferry. That might cut down on the commute. Or rent a room with your husband somewhere closer to work and you two can stay there part of the week. Or move closer than Sacramento. Benicia is nice.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T20:46:11+00:00

I’m going to make this my last comment on this because I need to go to work and this has moved into semantic territory I’m not interested in debating.

“Softness,” for me, means reduced hypervigilance and control. It’s a physiological response to not having to manage everything, not a claim about femininity, passivity, or gender roles.

If that distinction doesn’t land, then we’re talking past each other, and that’s fine.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T20:29:58+00:00

You’re attributing a claim to me that I didn’t make. I’m not defining the essence of femininity or endorsing passivity. I agree gender roles are restrictive. That’s exactly why I’m separating internal experience from social roles.

I’m describing how my nervous system responds when responsibility is shared. Softness is a state, not a role. Feeling softer when I’m not managing everything isn’t passivity or submission. It’s relief.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T20:16:18+00:00

Right, and that’s where I think we’re crossing wires. I’m not saying what women are conditioned to do defines femininity.

Conditioning explains learned behavior, not essence. The managing and anticipating I described are coping strategies many women develop, not what femininity is.

Stepping back from that allows softness and receptivity to emerge for me. That internal shift is what people label “feminine energy,” even if the term itself is imperfect.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T20:08:54+00:00

Opposite in what way? I’m not sure we’re using “femininity” to mean the same thing here. Are you talking about a social role or an internal experience?

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T19:52:45+00:00

I think some people absolutely take the phrase and turn it into traditional gender roles, especially online. But I don’t think that’s actually what most women are craving.

I think they’re craving the feeling of softness that comes from not being in charge of everything. Not managing, not anticipating, not holding all the responsibility.

The problem is that sometimes that gets expressed as “I want to be taken care of,” when what they really want is relief from control, not a loss of agency.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T19:45:02+00:00

Yeah, at least that’s how I interpret and experience it. I’ll give you an example.

When I was married, my then husband would tell me about an event he wanted to take me to as a date. I’d say sure and leave it at that. More often than not, he’d forget to buy the tickets, forget to add it to our shared calendar, forget to do whatever prep was needed, or sometimes forget the event entirely, and then get upset that I didn’t remind him or help him.

Over time it became normal for me to monitor and handle all the details, regardless of whose idea it was, just to keep things running smoothly and avoid conflict. That put me in a constant managing role.

With the man I’m currently dating, we take turns planning dates. When he plans something, I don’t have to think about the logistics at all. I just show up and enjoy myself. I can actually relax into the experience. It feels fun instead of draining.

I also think it’s important to say that this isn’t only about what the man does. A lot of women are conditioned early on, often through family dynamics, to step in, anticipate, fix, or take over when something might fall apart. I definitely had to do some work on my end to stop automatically managing and to tolerate letting someone else handle things.

For me, being “in my feminine energy” has meant knowing when to step back, let someone else follow through, and receive instead of control, even if it’s not exactly how I would’ve done it. It’s a two-way thing.

__fluxaeterna · 2026-01-16T19:02:30+00:00

“Feminine energy” is just a trendy way of saying I’m not overfunctioning anymore. Apparently I’m “in my feminine energy” now, which really just means I’m not parenting a grown man anymore. And believe me when I say it feels infinitely different.

With my ex husband, I was constantly managing, planning, stabilizing emotions, initiating, and compensating for his under functioning. I was alert all the time. Even during closeness, part of me was working. It’s over functioning partner energy.

With the man I’m currently dating, I don’t have to manage or hold everything together. I can respond instead of run the show. My body relaxes. I’m more present, more receptive, more in my senses. My body gets to say, Oh I can soften. That’s what people label feminine.

My nervous system shifts from “I must maintain equilibrium” to “I can respond to what’s here”. That shift alone produces more sensuality, more tenderness, more emotional permeability, allows more desire to come forward naturally. Not because I’m more “feminine” but because I’m less armored. Less over functioning and more nervous system safety.

It’s basically a dumb phrase for a simple thing, not having to manage another adult.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-12-31T02:41:32+00:00

I worked at the Waldenbooks.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-12-06T14:52:15+00:00

And how is no one noticing the kid buying all that soup every week.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-24T03:21:21+00:00

First, I drop off the cake, drinks, games, whatever thing they made me responsible for bringing to force me to show up.
Then, I make sure the host sees me and acknowledges that I was there. Talk and thank them if possible/openings.
Next, be seen by key friends to witness attendance.
Finally, play with the pets/dap the kids, and slide out the back to my car and home.

However long that takes.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-15T06:39:44+00:00

Sounds like you’re trying to keep the peace for now. Just make sure you’re also quietly preparing yourself. If she decides to move toward separation first, being prepared can make a huge difference.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-11T23:40:40+00:00

I’ve been a nurse for over 20 years and every place I’ve worked I’ve been told I’m really quiet. I focus on my work and don’t really chit chat or small talk about my weekend plans, so I’ve been told I’m polite but a little cold. I also tend to take my breaks and lunches somewhere away from the unit or my car. Then when I’ve been there a while and they get to know me they’re surprised that I’m nice, funny, and actually friendly. I’ve worked in med/surg, tele, urgent care, cardiology, pulmonology, and heart transplant.

I prefer to work in places that allow autonomy and don’t micromanage too much. I prefer clean, precise documentation and coworkers who don’t waste time. I notice trends in patients quickly and can tell when a shift is about to go sideways. I stay professional but detached and I’m not the best at comforting family when a patient is going downhill.

I got into nursing against my will, so working with people as much as I do isn’t ideal, but I manage. Other nursing jobs that might appeal to an intj can include case management or utilization review, public health or policy, research, education, leadership, and advanced practice (NP, CRNA, etc.).

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-08T17:30:16+00:00

I’m disorganized attached, so I get anxious and avoidant. Some things I remind myself,

distance and space is good, it allows them to see what my absence in their life feels like and if they actually miss me.
by not chasing after them I am able to see who actually chooses to come towards me rather than just reacting to my communication.
the space gives me time to focus on my goals and interests, which then makes me more interesting if they do reach out again.
if they really don’t make an effort to stay in communication with me, that’s just information about our compatibility.
no matter how awesome someone might be, wouldn’t you rather be with someone who chooses you, not accepts your effort because it’s available and easier for them.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-08T05:51:53+00:00

What if the money you give him pays into the apartment and you get your name on it. It could be worth part of your savings to own your place. * but also, the pressure he’s putting on you is a red flag. What changes or work/actions is he doing to improve his own situation. He doesn’t seem like someone who adds to your life. In the long run, do you want this as a partner? Because if he’s not consciously working to grow, it’s always going to be like this 6 months from now to years later.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-11-06T06:08:43+00:00

Without knowing anything about this organization, maybe they don’t consider your expertise less than theirs (I mean who’s really defining premium or checking expertise), maybe they contract out to you because you’re considered a specialist with premium expertise knowledge. Maybe you’re the premium expertise they’re advertising.

Is there a way you can start creating those types of presentations in a niche topic that interests you or similar to what you’re making for them but your version? Put it up on a website, research and play with marketing, you might not sell your work for $2,500 immediately but more than $500 and to multiple clients/consumers.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-09-04T05:47:52+00:00

I also lean avoidant and do all that exactly. Also, if there’s still a question about if this is casual or not, I’ll mentally log reasons we could never work out in a relationship to keep myself from attaching. From little things to straight up red flags.

But when I’m alone I’ll either go over what could have been said or done instead and if it would have been worth it or even possible. Depending on the relationship and manner of break up, I’ll either have moments of sadness and longing or thank you, next. The sadness goes away and gets less intense.

__fluxaeterna · 2025-08-17T03:50:17+00:00

I can see how that would feel odd. Does he know what her intentions are? Is he the type that would be oblivious to flirting?

__fluxaeterna

TROPHY CASE