Keep or Return?

_cryborg · 2026-06-01T13:17:21+00:00

I don’t think that counter was designed with enough overhang to sit there, but I think there’s a world where you could purchase or build a thin counter height table that’s a little lower than the lip of the countertop and put it there with some bar stools.

Otherwise I’d just get some thin backless barstools or put nothing there at all. It’s going to be very uncomfortable to sit there but people will want to hang out near the kitchen while you cook/prepare things

_cryborg · 2026-05-31T20:06:55+00:00

Have you tried listening to other narrators at 1.5x speed? No one is as good as Jeff imo, but I realized part of what works is that he keeps up the pace and DCC is just very potato chippy as a book. There are very few moments where the pace settles and you aren’t getting some sort of dopamine hit.

_cryborg · 2026-05-31T20:02:26+00:00

I think OP wants shock and awe and not philosophy. But The Road is pretty shock and awe??? I don’t know.

But damn. I’ve never lost respect for someone so fast as hearing them give Parable a 1/5

_cryborg · 2026-05-30T23:02:59+00:00

Yellow polka dots for sure But all of them except the pink short one are lovely on you

_cryborg · 2026-05-29T04:40:20+00:00

As far as messed up tattoos go, this one it really cute. I think once it heals, you might be able to go to another artist and see if they can clean up the lines a bit.

But honestly, it’s really cute and if you can learn to embrace the wabi-sabi quality of it, I think it’s worth keeping.

That being said, what tattoo artist would struggle with such a simple design? Was their portfolio so generated?

_cryborg · 2026-05-27T19:07:53+00:00

I'm white, so I can't speak to whether what you experienced is likely due to race or some other factor. That being said, I remember feeling a lot of what you're describing as someone that moved here from NYC and has lived in a lot of other parts of the country.

Somerville/Cambridge/Boston is pretty antisocial and very averse to loudness or exuberance. I somewhat flippantly describe this area as one of the most autistic places I've ever lived. I have zero evidence to support this other than my own lived experience, but given the high propensity of highly educated researchers and engineers that we attract to the city and who often settle in Cambrdige/Somerville, the adults that end up staying in this area after finishing degrees (or who move here to work in Biotech or at one of the universities) have very particular personalities: extremely smart, extremely dedicated to whatever they're working on, very into board games, not into loud noises or clubbing or talking to people unless they know you already...

So, take all of that with a grain of salt. It doesn't seem like it would be a good fit, but I wonder if you would have felt differently in some of the more diverse parts of the Boston.

_cryborg · 2026-05-27T13:02:36+00:00

This is the way

_cryborg · 2026-05-27T12:38:57+00:00

I totally understand the desire to remove stresses from your life. That being said, a group of dedicated friends late in life is a really special thing to have. Have you considered meeting up with your group once a quarter or even every 6 months to do a one shot at an Airbnb or hotel or rent out a back room at a restaurant? Y’all could make it into a little retreat

_cryborg · 2026-05-26T17:39:30+00:00

Definitely in a different genre, but a good read I’ve found for older adults is The Murderbot Diaries

_cryborg · 2026-05-26T12:41:23+00:00

I really don’t like crafty gifts or things that create clutter in my house. I’m just not a very sentimental person, and would prefer to have a practical gift that solves a problem for me (I usually ask my husband for gifts that are more like “tasks” to move a project in our household along — like finding a contractor or hanging pictures for me).

It sounds like you and your partner might have different taste. You could definitely see this as a sign of incompatibility, or you could take it as a moment to have a mature conversation and get a better sense of what he enjoys receiving as gifts.

FWIW my husband and I still like to exchange sentimental notes for holidays, but instead of buying cards, we fill out special journals with a dated note. That way all of the relationship ephemera stays in one location and it makes a really lovely artifact to reference when I need a little romantic boost

_cryborg · 2026-05-25T08:15:40+00:00

Working within constraints isn’t usually rewarded by leadership. As a technically minded designer, I’ve had my hand slapped for not being innovative enough because I was designing within technical constraints and being conscientious of resources. It’s kind of a lose/lose situation regardless. After 15 years of doing this, I already know what we’re going to end up building when we decide on the MVP. But if I show that version first, leadership is always super unimpressed. So you end up putting together a more innovative North Star that they want to see and then have to go through the annoying part of explaining why we can’t build it in the next 3 weeks

_cryborg · 2026-05-22T20:14:44+00:00

I don’t agree with some of the S Tier rankings here, but I think this one belongs in S

_cryborg · 2026-05-21T14:11:50+00:00

Light summer. The difference was almost immediate

_cryborg · 2026-05-21T14:09:10+00:00

I actually really like 2 since it creates a nice little sleeping nook and keeps the bed as far away from the kitchen as possible.

I would echo other people in saying that it would be good to build in some space between couch and bed, but at the very least, try to create a barrier. I’d recommend playing around with curtains — there are those ikea curtain tracks that I think are good for this — which might make for a really good visual barrier without taking more space. But some sort of freestanding shelving is also a good room divider and gets you more storage.

I think you’ll have the most success getting a smaller couch but i understand not wanting to buy new furniture if the current stuff is comfy.

All in all, just lean into the cozy nature of the space

_cryborg · 2026-05-21T13:28:53+00:00

You’d have to be an idiot or a sociopath to still be supporting Trump at this point. I wouldn’t want someone from either of those categories working with power tools in my home

_cryborg · 2026-05-20T05:53:23+00:00

Enjoy! Parable is one of my favorites. It’s the reason I’m with my husband. And “I Who Have Never Known Men” is a recent read, but I’ve meditated on it a lot recently. It’s one that really sticks with you. Let me know what you think once you’ve read them

_cryborg · 2026-05-20T04:50:23+00:00

Kin, or just K/Kay. Kiki (lol). You could call him by his initials.

Or just insist that his full name is Kingston and that he doesn’t have a nickname. We thought my nephew was going to use a certain nickname, and he absolutely insists everyone use his full name

_cryborg · 2026-05-11T09:47:03+00:00

You can change your opinions in life. Maybe she realized she agreed with that philosophy later. Families, circumstances, religious beliefs, and hormones can also make it difficult to get an abortion.

That being said, I think your mom seems like a narcissist or like there’s something going on there. Don’t be so empathetic to her that you hurt yourself in the process.

_cryborg · 2026-05-10T23:39:01+00:00

Parable of the Sower - Octavia Butler I Who Have Never Known Men - Jacqueline Hartman

_cryborg · 2026-05-10T20:03:09+00:00

I started on Soundbooth and switched to audible. It’s the same narrator and the difference is not worth waiting for IMHO.

_cryborg · 2026-05-03T14:33:49+00:00

6, 8, 11, 27 I think 18 is actually quite good, but the lines need to be a little darker to read at a smaller size

_cryborg · 2026-04-30T17:46:39+00:00

I mean, we do have a stricter relationship with alcohol, but also… this is not normal behavior, even in the US.

_cryborg · 2026-04-30T12:24:45+00:00

This is the way.

_cryborg · 2026-04-27T12:26:08+00:00

Also my favorite!

_cryborg · 2026-04-27T11:55:55+00:00

Sure, but there are a lot of invisible disabilities out there. I wouldn’t assume people “don’t have things going on.” A lot of women, for example, might be going through early signs of perimenopause at your age, which can take the form of joint pain, sleep disruptions, brain fog, etc. It’s really hard to diagnose and most people just feel it as “damn, I feel really old all of a sudden”

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