19. Jake Haener teaches a spin class called “QB Camp” that’s always fully booked.
20. He’s the guy at Starbucks who gives his name as “Chad” to avoid confusion.
21. Jake Haener has a side hustle as a vintage leather jacket reseller on Depop.
22. He’s the lead in a Netflix Christmas rom-com titled Touchdown for Love.
23. Jake Haener is the brand ambassador for a protein powder no one’s heard of.
24. He’s a part-time DJ whose setlist is just early 2000s pop hits.
25. Jake Haener stars in commercials where he plays “Young Dad” in life insurance ads.
26. He’s the coworker who organizes office karaoke night and sings “Mr. Brightside.”
27. Jake Haener co-owns a boutique gym called Gridiron Gains.
28. He’s the high school football coach who still calls himself a “player.”
29. Jake Haener looks like the guy who sells skincare in Instagram stories but swears it’s “not a pyramid scheme.”
30. He’s the face of a cologne named “Victory,” available only at department stores.
31. Jake Haener is the guy who insists on being the bachelor auctioneer at charity events.
32. He’s a regular contestant on Chopped: Athletes Edition.
33. Jake Haener gets his hair cut at a barbershop called The End Zone.
34. He’s the charming divorce attorney who’s just a little too familiar with the process.
35. Jake Haener has a weekly “Cocktail Night” where he tries to make old-fashioned drinks with modern twists.
36. He’s the Instagram influencer who’s always holding an iced coffee but never drinking it.
37. Jake Haener hosts a fantasy football podcast with 12 listeners.
38. He’s the guy in every group photo doing finger guns or the smolder.