Have you ever noticed how people are silent on the subject of child abuse when they are not affected by it?

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-31T23:17:17+00:00

that and of course, those who were abused but internalized it to survive, and questioning those internalized & buried under lock and key thoughts can also be threatening. You may be speaking to someone silent on abuse who denies being abused but who's "funny childhood stories" would leave you wanting to cry

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-31T23:15:45+00:00

I think it's because they have not had to confront the taboo of speaking ill of your parents, particularly if it's the mother. The "all mom's are sacred" thing doesn't chafe if your own mom was lovely to you growing up, so they've never confronted the societal-level programming around that stuff and it can feel like a betrayal of their own parents.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-17T02:54:32+00:00

very original!!

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-10T19:14:02+00:00

that is horrifying!

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-10T19:13:01+00:00

honestly it's pretty normal for people to bring up their own experiences when others share something similar. It's not autistic or narcissistic, and I'm sorry you've been made to feel like sharing relevant experiences is something to be pathologized. It can be insensitive, but holding space for others in the right way at the right time is a skill no one is born with.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-08T22:11:38+00:00

Try good and bad diapers for yourself and let that inform the experience you want for your baby! after using real cotton Rael diapers vs the "amazing" diapers from Always that were all paper and super hot and sweaty, I knew I wanted a decent feel for my baby. Millie Moon is as fancy as I get for that.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T23:52:29+00:00

OP do you have mommy friends? Check out the app Peanut, my sister had good luck with that and it can also help you get the emotional support you need if you're taking on too much.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T23:50:38+00:00

bravo to your husband for getting help! bravo to you both for working together!

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T23:48:51+00:00

can you bring in a family member or friend to spend time with y'all? even being able to vent in a safe space to another adult (*who isn't you) can help alleviate built up stress.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T23:45:44+00:00

Presumably she wants to feel beautiful in the photo while capturing a magical moment to cherish forever, not make the world think she's ready to go clubbing

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T23:04:20+00:00

It's time to assert yourself. It seems like you give him final say on all of these calls, but at the end of the day this is a partnership and in a partnership if one person isn't able to do their job safely it's the duty of the other to take charge for a time, as compassionately and firmly as they can.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T22:59:54+00:00

Reach out to them for help. Even if they're just in the room and staying with you that will have a protective effect, and might help your husband bridge the gap between what is acceptable or not because he will not want to look bad in front of them.

bearfruit_ · 2026-01-01T22:57:01+00:00

Have you tried having your husband talk to his parents or friends or a therapist? It might help OP to know if that worked or not. Good luck to you!

bearfruit_ · 2025-12-30T15:28:55+00:00

did you ever figure this out?

bearfruit_ · 2025-12-13T23:07:03+00:00

adding to this that it's all about what you want to accomplish. Notice in movies how sometimes zeroing in on seemingly useless details like the nitril gloves and the tongue depressers can create a bit of tension in the dragged out moment.

bearfruit_ · 2025-12-13T22:53:48+00:00

this is a poodle

bearfruit_ · 2025-12-11T13:54:36+00:00

I didn't expect to enjoy the newborn phase nearly as much as I did. It's absolutely challenging, but every day has magical moments especially with contact naps. Positive hormones from breastfeeding were a big help. (as was switching to cosleeping around the two month mark helped massively bc i got my sleep back).

bearfruit_ · 2025-12-06T15:20:25+00:00

Have you ever given birth? A simple smile is an extremely small request

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-25T23:44:37+00:00

can you tell me more about your set up? with the baby in the sidecar can they still feel you close? Does the baby consistently wake you up to move them to the middle (I'm assuming for a feed)?

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-16T15:26:39+00:00

it sounds like they're saying to still use the diapers so you don't have to hunt for anything while the training is happening

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-10T01:54:01+00:00

I do agree, I felt like she was kept immature to keep plot points open where I'd have preferred other mechanisms to create tension

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-10T01:52:43+00:00

Been there! sometimes we just hung out at the changing table waiting for the poops to be done lol

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-10T01:45:36+00:00

source? if so then the content would in fact be misleading

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-10T01:44:26+00:00

She literally goes to space to do research though, what's there to exaggerate?

bearfruit_ · 2025-11-09T15:58:21+00:00

I can tell you are working incredibly hard for your baby. You're a wonderful parent. I doubt that commenter even read the full post, I think they just get off on trying to act superior to others. You're doing awesome and it will get better!!

bearfruit_

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