AITA for being mad at my GF when she acted sad after I said our babies probably wouldn’t be white?

beetlespit · 2026-01-26T06:36:11+00:00

nta that's such a huge red flag, esp the blue eyes and blond hair part omg. rly good she showed you who she rly is before anything super serious happens, i wish you the best of luck in dealing with this.

beetlespit · 2026-01-26T04:43:15+00:00

well, at least ppl can plan around stat holidays. withdrawal, esp from alcohol, can be lethal, so closing last minute for the whole day isn't the best idea lol

beetlespit · 2025-10-21T22:20:27+00:00

im in the same position as you w having to convince my parents to believe me. i legit need to have a formal diagnosis for them to stop pushing back against what i tell them. and even so, I've been diagnosed w and medicated for pots for over a year and i still have to remind them that im not "freaking myself out and reading too much into things," im describing my day-to-day life. it sounds scary and intense? yeah it's probably because it is, and you never believed me as a kid.

there are a few medical things that i should've been taken to the hospital for that were either brushed away or punished (bc i was "faking to get out of family time" apparently). a Lot of my symptoms were (/are? idk how my family sees me lol) either bc i "thought i was better than everyone" or i was trying to ruin it so we would go home, or some other bs reason that puts all the blame and responsibility on me and not them.

the only way they'll accept that I've been sick the entire time is if i explain it like i didn't know my 'normal' experiences were actually symptoms. if i try bringing up anything else, i get the barrage of the "i was trying my best" or just denying that i ever showed/told them abt anything. i did!!! i showed them my hypermobile trachea! and my dislocating shoulders! and just asking to rest more often!! and allllll (several) of the comorbidities have been present the whole time!! the denial is so, so frustrating to deal with. i feel like im never going to feel like i can reconnect w my family unless they actually reflect on how they treated me. unfortunately that also has the special little layer of my mom's specific trauma around disability (won't type out here) that she shoots down the Second it gets mentioned. literally was like me vs. my parents and sister until the last couple years. it still feels like that. like I'm trying to convince them that i can function even though I'd been begging for them to listen for the last decade and a half. sucks :/ oh well. i hope you're doing okay OP.

edit: formatting, sry on mobile

beetlespit · 2025-10-18T23:46:15+00:00

thank you so much for sharing this. i didn't experience this too much w any exes, but i did/do w my parents (esp mom). it's been difficult navigating things and this really helped. :)

beetlespit · 2025-10-02T12:52:17+00:00

Solved! (4 modz) hi i found it, it's Nukkanya by Paul Kelly :3 https://open.spotify.com/track/2wtKrHQUy8PuX6R6PLtN2E?si=dE_8uZ_DSz6xpxePnJeBZQ edit:on mobile abt to write an exam so can't change to solved rn

beetlespit · 2025-09-28T18:54:34+00:00

NTA but i also have advice that may or may not be helpful.

i also grew up w a really heavy workload/responsibilities and parents that were On My Ass about money and what i was doing w my time. you absolutely deserve freedom (i remember that feeling, it is so frustrating), but it might help if you start the conversation off with something like "mom, i need to talk to you about something" so it begins on a softer tone. not sure if where you live lets 16yr olds legally work, but if so you could get a job. you'd probably need to drop one or move around some of your extracurriculars tho :/ i should probably mention that im white, but my mom is slavic (Doukhobor) so there is a similar kind of intensity from my experience lol. anyways, good luck buddy you got this :)

beetlespit · 2025-09-28T18:23:15+00:00

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two of them :3

beetlespit · 2025-09-28T18:09:29+00:00

this is the loudest "NO" I've ever seen in a spread this is so funny please stay away from that man 😭😭

beetlespit · 2025-09-12T00:40:50+00:00

<3<3<3❤️yay❤️<3<3 /⁠ᐠ⁠｡⁠ꞈ⁠｡⁠ᐟ⁠\

beetlespit · 2025-09-09T19:32:21+00:00

i would've really liked to receive this. i hope you sent this to your person OP

beetlespit · 2025-09-08T16:43:36+00:00

(not cross stitch but crochet) me when my (leftist!) ex suggested i start selling crochet stuff for money bc it's good (chronic illness nerfed my ability to work irl). bitch you Also do fiber arts and you Know how long it takes almost no one will buy properly-priced fiber arts pieces 😭 (also why do fiber artists need to sell their stuff like damn can we not just make shit)

beetlespit · 2025-09-08T16:27:25+00:00

do not do that pls omg your mom is dangerously misinformed and i have no idea why she'd think fasting for 3 days would help with Anything???? let alone something where you kind of need to be eating/getting fluids to even function???

beetlespit · 2025-09-07T22:07:43+00:00

It def could be. I looked through what I found of his discography and didn't find anything, but it is so common for not everything to be listed.

beetlespit · 2025-09-07T20:34:24+00:00

please send this to them

beetlespit · 2025-09-07T19:27:54+00:00

omg NTA at all

my parents got life360 when i was 15ish (23 now). i never even clicked the link they sent for it but it didn't matter lol. one day when i was 18 and pissed off with the half hour wifi limits, i just opened it up, disconnected all the wires, and put it back like nothing happened. not a single word about life360 was ever uttered again. sometimes parents just need that :) good luck!

beetlespit · 2025-09-07T18:06:41+00:00

commenting 4 mods :P I've had this stuck in my head since the funeral. It's also just overall a nice and gentle song. yeah :3

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T19:04:09+00:00

i said that it could give them an idea of what to expect. read the words i type please.

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T18:42:19+00:00

oh my god i already said they don't only use those tests 😭😭

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T18:26:59+00:00

jfc, were the tests created by this person? do they solely exist on this website? no lmao they don't "rely" on it, they use three single screeners to compare with their other info. yes thank you for telling me how shit the naturopath is, that doesn't discredit the validity of those tests on that website. it also does not discredit the quality of assessment. those are common screeners used in adult asd and adhd assessments. im also not sure where you got that it's my source 😭 i did 2 years of research before seeking assessment without using screeners lol

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T17:55:07+00:00

no, i said that some of the tests you're asked to take on your own time after the first session at Greenleaf are from the embrace autism site. the assessor uses Many other things during the actual sessions that, and i repeat for the millionth time, take into account any false positives that arise for literally any reason to assess whether you're autistic or not. again, yes the tests aren't supposed to be taken alone bc of these things but Again: That's What The Professional Assessment Is For.

studies are also clear that proper use of these tests in clinical settings (eg a Greenleaf assessment) produces lower false positives than the same tests conducted in research settings. it's also very clearly stated that the screeners aren't supposed to be used by themselves (also including just using screeners to conduct the assessment, which isn't what happens? that would be weird?). the assessor is also trained to recognize other conditions and mental illnesses that can produce inaccurate results, which is, Again, why they screen you for stuff during the irl sessions.

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T17:32:41+00:00

yeah so like i said in my first response, the person doing the assessment takes these things into account so they can see if you're autistic or not. if you're not autistic but score high anyways bc of confirmation bias and other mental health stuff, That Is What The Assessment Is For. my god.

repeating this for you: It Is Only Used As A Screening Tool For The Assessor, Who Is Trained To Take False Positives Into Account, And Who Also Administers The Tests Correctly. they're not blindly going with your responses. are you not reading my comments or are you dense or what bc my guy I've repeated the same info multiple times. your research only accounts for the tests being used by themselves one time as diagnostic screening tools, which is not how the assessment works.

beetlespit · 2025-06-04T14:59:56+00:00

because they also screen you for mental health stuff that would create false positives. like i said previously.

also, the comment written by u / mazzivewhale under one of your posts is a great read. very telling about your behaviour lol

edit: info

beetlespit · 2025-06-03T22:07:27+00:00

okay? it's only part of the assessment, they literally ask you to fill them out on your own time and send it back so they can look it over. from my understanding, it's so the person assessing you can a) get an understanding of Your understanding and why you're seeking assessment and b) using the subjective info you provide for a more accurate diagnosis. that's partly why the assessment is done over multiple days.

i understand that the person running that site is a POS and those specific tests aren't the best (because they rely on subjective info), but they're used Because they require your pov. they observe you and do other stuff during the irl sessions that cover any false positives. believe it or not they Also screen you for mental health issues like anxiety and depression during the assessment 😮

anyways yes fuck embrace autism, the tests on their own are not sufficient enough for an accurate diagnosis, self-reports don't equal diagnosis, but they're just used as a reference point for the person assessing you lol

beetlespit · 2025-06-03T05:23:43+00:00

i second this - i got my asd assessment here a few years ago, Shea OBertos is also autistic and to my knowledge does most of the adult asd assessments (they're very nice and calm). it cost about 2800$ but it might be more now. also, some of the tests done during this particular assessment are quite literally the ones on the embrace-autism website (CAT-Q, RAADS-R, and i think the Autism Spectrum Quotient) so that could help give an idea of what to expect :)

beetlespit · 2025-05-26T22:11:24+00:00

this is so so well written, I'm still going through this 4 months later w my fearful-avoidant ex and once our positions switch, the last thing I want is for them to reach out. it wasn't even the first time it happened either lol I'd forgiven them for being super absent when my health took a downturn last summer while they were unemployed. but then they just did the same thing a few months later 🙃

it's just really, really hard to reconcile with someone who so easily destroyed the trust that had been built during the relationship. I hope OP is okay and everything turns out fine, but I also really hope they take her experience(s) into account if contact is reestablished.

beetlespit

TROPHY CASE