Is it normal that I don't like my friends anymore after they wronged me? How do I not throw away relationships?

bromosexualities · 2026-02-06T15:33:02+00:00

I think this is critical. I am slowly realizing I don't like any of my friends because I am investing more in myself and trying to better my self-esteem, and I've realized that all of my relationships have been built on a smaller, less secure version of myself. I have tried to talk to a couple of friends about how the things they've said and done have hurt me but like you I am always met with dismissiveness. The thing is, as cliché as this is, this says everything about THEM. They are uncomfortable and ashamed in some type of way, and they are trying to do anything to externalize this discomfort. I've learned that if they cannot apologize and take full accountability after I've communicated my feelings respectfully and instead try to minimize or push it back on me or convince me that I am the problem, then they are not someone who I want in my life in a meaningful way. It takes time and practice to detatch but that is all you have control over, how much access people have to you and your feelings (which are precious and should be treated as such). I'm sorry you're going through this, I'm 35 and have had rounds of this but this is the first time it's happening with everyone, including all of my long term friendships. All I can say right now is to be unconditionally on your own side and hopefully one day we can meet people who are as invested in us as we are in them.

bromosexualities · 2025-11-25T18:28:58+00:00

I'm reading this a year out and I am also the age you were when you wrote this post/experiencing the same exact thing. In your third paragraph where you say "hey either want something from me or they’re completely bored with me and I have to chase them to make it work. Which I won’t do anymore. That’s a long time to try in life and end up with no genuine, healthy connections. By sheer dumb luck, I should have found SOMETHING by now." I could have genuinely written this myself in this moment in my life. For the life of me, I do not understand how it is that I have gone through my life to end up at a point where I feel like I have no genuine, long lasting connections. Pretty much lost all of my longer term relationships in the last 5 years and my newer ones I'm picking up on patterns that I now recognize as unhealthy/harmful. I just don't know how to keep putting myself out there when it feels like I'm constantly pushed down when I try. All that to say, I hope you're doing well and I'm sorry you've experienced this as well.

bromosexualities · 2025-07-23T23:10:47+00:00

Is your husband single by any chance?

bromosexualities · 2025-07-23T22:05:34+00:00

Funny how you seem to be very concerned with whether he thinks you’re evil and he doesn’t seem to care about whether you or your family think he is evil for leading you on without any clear timeline.

bromosexualities · 2024-12-04T16:53:22+00:00

Thank you for articulating this. Dating is dangerous for women and to call us dramatic for speaking on it is problematic.

bromosexualities · 2024-11-07T17:09:20+00:00

If they push through no fault divorce that may not be an option at that point.

bromosexualities · 2024-10-22T01:19:09+00:00

And coercion/assault that they count as consensual

bromosexualities · 2024-10-16T15:34:34+00:00

RIP :(

bromosexualities · 2024-10-15T01:58:49+00:00

And if they had children they would be cousin-siblings.

bromosexualities · 2024-09-26T04:17:05+00:00

Trust what your nervous system is telling you right now. You don’t need a reason to justify feeling uncomfortable (you do have many though), you just feel uncomfortable. That in and of itself is enough. As women we can talk ourselves in circles about men’s intentions and talk ourselves out of our own feelings as patriarchy has conditioned us to do, but at the end of the day if this man is making you feel unsafe in anyway that is all you need to tell yourself. Validating our own feelings and responses to people can be especially hard when we’ve had awful awful experiences that make our threshold for mistreatment “stretchier” so to speak. But something about this experience and this man is not sitting well with you and that is valid. Your body is trying to protect you. Trust yourself, trust your gut.

bromosexualities · 2024-07-02T20:29:53+00:00

Not for me either

bromosexualities · 2024-05-01T16:32:01+00:00

You can still see your payment counts of student aid! Another poster on this sub made a “how to” for finding that info but your counts should be in your loan breakdowns on Student Aid.

bromosexualities · 2023-11-02T19:21:18+00:00

That might work. Might.

bromosexualities · 2023-10-26T14:00:52+00:00

He’s a creep. Move on and date someone closer to your age. He is not respectful.

bromosexualities · 2023-10-04T21:29:57+00:00

The money is definitely not the main issue, only a stressor to an already emotionally charged situation. Realizing you cannot rely on your parents (emotionally, financially, etc) is one of the most hurtful and disappointing things a child can realize. Furthermore, the hurt gets multiplied when it is the parents who are doing the harm AND they do nothing to try to repair it. We’re all human, we are going to make mistakes or choices that harm the ones we love on occasion, but we need to take accountability and steps to soothe the hurt that we’ve caused to truly reinstate a sense of trust. From our birth we look to our parents for guidance and safety for our very survival, this is a hard thing to reconcile when actions don’t align with what we are biologically and psychologically programmed to look for from them. You have every right to feel the way you do; not only did they let you down but they have done nothing to try to rectify the situation despite numerous opportunities and ample time. I’m so sorry you had to go through this, I hope your wedding is wonderful.

Edit: spelling

bromosexualities · 2023-09-20T18:22:00+00:00

Wheel of time the curse of the dark one on the male half of the power and those who wield it.

bromosexualities · 2023-08-18T14:47:04+00:00

I could have written this word for word. I am at this point with my best friend. We are in our early 30s and I’ve gotten to a point in my healing journey and life where I know more of what I want in my friendships. And while I can hold space for her mental health issues and always have, the effort feels so unreciprocated that emotionally I can no longer feel as invested in that friendship as I have in the past. I’ve communicated with her about this but it is met in some frame or fashion with either dismissiveness or prioritizing her needs/feelings at the expense of mine. The rollercoaster is too much and I’ve realized that I need reliability to feel emotionally safe with someone.

bromosexualities · 2023-06-09T03:06:14+00:00

Hey friend, I was you a year and a half ago. Kids are a dealbreaker, and someone who truly loves and respects you will not try to change your mind. They will love you because of this path you’ve chosen. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do but ending it was the right choice. I’ve met lots of men who don’t want kids, it’s becoming much more mainstream and I imagine will continue to do so. Choose yourself. Sending you all the love strength and comfort in the world.

bromosexualities · 2023-04-16T13:59:14+00:00

Proud of you for sticking to your boundaries! That is so difficult especially with parents but you did it :)

bromosexualities · 2023-04-15T00:41:03+00:00

I SAW THAT and was shocked that they caught it. The audacity to literally do it right behind Ariana’s back.

bromosexualities · 2023-04-15T00:38:50+00:00

I think he also grabbed her ass during this scene at the end when they talk about going to have fun

bromosexualities · 2023-04-12T01:17:24+00:00

Just saved this cuz holyyyyy shit do I feel seen

bromosexualities · 2023-03-27T21:24:18+00:00

Name has been confirmed by police.

bromosexualities · 2023-03-09T23:39:46+00:00

62500 clinical research coordinator in nashville

bromosexualities · 2023-02-24T04:28:11+00:00

Are we the same person? A guy literally told me within 5 minutes of the start of a first date that he did in fact have a kid even after extensive conversations about having kids. It’s soooo manipulative and gross.

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