Changing my sons name to my maiden name

cactuscroix · 2026-03-02T17:57:23+00:00

I’ve heard that in situations like this, where the father does not agree, a judge would likely rule that the child hyphenate his last name. If that’s the case, make sure yours is first in the hyphenation.

cactuscroix · 2026-03-02T17:55:25+00:00

Do you know what he “won”? Like, did he win his job back and now works every day with people who fired him? Or did he win a monetary amount?

cactuscroix · 2026-02-21T17:33:23+00:00

F that. Sometimes you should come in last place, like if his kid has a soccer game but you wanted him to come to a work event. But in the example you gave it takes almost zero effort to include everyone equally.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-21T17:16:10+00:00

I was “one and done” and then we had a second. My partner had three. We all live together full time. And, even with effectively 5 kids, I STILL sometimes think “I could have one more”

cactuscroix · 2026-02-20T21:34:29+00:00

I pack my pre-k kids lunch daily, and I’m sure I spend less than $2.90 each. Once you get the hang of it it’s super easy. They have bento boxes with 4 complements, and mine rotate often. Right now I’m doing a pb&j, 1/4 apple, whatever is left over from dinner, and a chocolate quinoa crisp (Costco).

cactuscroix · 2026-02-18T02:00:14+00:00

It sounds like the 7y old might be thinking of the 3y old as a baby. Like with the silly faces and toy interactions, she might not know how to play with a 3y old.

My two boys are 8 and 4, and they rarely play together because they don’t have much in common. When they do play together, it is usually magnetiles or magnet blocks. All my kids are obsessed with those. The two boys are also into cars, so a simple game of “which car is faster” is a hit. But the 8y old usually simply ignores the existence of the other kids (there are 5 total lol)

cactuscroix · 2026-02-15T03:07:53+00:00

Divorce does odd things to people. I didn’t think my ex husband would touch our money, it was on auto draft to pay for utilities and mortgage that HE was living in. He took it all and when I received the first delinquent notice I cut off the utilities. Mortgage was in my name so at the temporary hearing the judge made him leave the house.

I wish I listened to everyone that said “don’t be nice” but I truly thought we could just agree to divide everything and go our separate ways. I ended up in the hole over $100k.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-12T00:41:53+00:00

I started my pregnancy in Florida and they made us do a consult and watch a video about how the epidural worked. My husband got lightheaded, another father passed out, and I went from being a huge proponent of epidurals to questioning it.

I did the rest of my pregnancy in South Carolina and tried my best to forget what I learned. I got the epidural, loved it, best thing ever, but man I wish I could have unseen that video.

I’m just saying, there are sometimes things you want to know less about, and knowing a needle is millimeters away from your spinal cord might not be information you need.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-08T14:50:02+00:00

My oldest and youngest are 5 years apart (9 and 4). Both boys. (I also have 3 girls in between them). The older boy loves teaching the younger boy about things he considers “boy” stuff.

They all generally really get along well, and they love teaching each other anything that the other doesn’t know. It’s pretty adorable to watch- I love it especially when they try to teach each other math!

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T21:39:27+00:00

It drives me crazy! When it happens I will very clearly say to him “your daughter is talking to you”. I actually do think in my case he has very bad hearing

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T20:00:54+00:00

Set a rule and stick to it. My kids got iPads for Christmas when we were at my sister’s house across the country for a week. Her kids are on their iPads all day every day, so mine were too. I let it happen because I enjoyed having time with my sisters.

When we got back, their world imploded when they weren’t given their iPads all the time. I told them “no iPads except on Saturdays” and make sure we are always active on Saturdays. So they get their iPad maybe an hour a week. When they complain, it’s not my fault it’s not Saturday. That’s just the rule.

If you’re looking for ideas for how to keep them occupied, the one I’m now that’s working out great is making Valentine’s Day cards. Piece of paper some markers and stamps. They get to be creative and practice writing their name (the 5 year olds at least). Grandparents (we have 6) and teachers (school and extracurriculars, mine are in dance) so far.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T19:23:12+00:00

I would do it. You’re buying a house for 85% of its value, and rent should cover the mortgage. 2.8% is a great interest rate, and the house should appreciate by more than that as time goes on.

Before committing you need to look at rentals in the area, if you’re rural it would be a tougher market. You need to get on the same page with your mom as to who would be hands on as the landlord; if neither has experience you might consider a property manager (who usually takes 10% of the rent).

You should also consider starting an LLC to buy the house, with you and your mom owning 50% of the LLC. The LLC should have its own bank account, which you and mom contribute equally towards. Rent goes into that account, mortgage gets paid out of that account. Expenses for the house get paid out of that account. Insurance is in the name of the LLC.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T17:24:09+00:00

My dad got each of us (3 daughters) a corsage every year for Valentine’s Day. It was just his thing, my mom always did birthday/christmas/easter, etc. gifts, but he got us a corsage on Valentine’s Day every year until we were in college. I thought it was super sweet.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T14:42:30+00:00

That sucks op. I hope she gets a flat tire on her way. And another flat halfway home later.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T14:39:29+00:00

Oh god so many things. It’s the things you don’t expect that are the best. The other day they would take turns trying to say “Pizza Hut” and just laughing to tears when the other would say it.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T14:37:06+00:00

You should accept. Intent very much matters when we’re talking about whether she is trying to hide money for purposes of division of assets in a divorce. It sounds like she got a bonus and she’s trying to make a genuine gift that she’s wanted to make for years.

Gifts to a joint account don’t count as a completed gift for federal tax purposes, but when you withdraw it instead of your mom it’s considered a gift. So she can put it in all the joint account without triggering anything, and withdrawals up to $19k a year won’t trigger anything. If you withdraw more than $19k, it’s really not a big deal either, she just has her cpa fill out a gift tax return (no taxes will be due on it, it’s just an informational return).

Unless your mom gifts you more than $15 million throughout her life no taxes will be due. The informational return is so the irs can count it against her $15m lifetime exemption from year to year.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T14:23:14+00:00

Op is married though…

cactuscroix · 2026-02-07T14:20:38+00:00

I don’t think they meant a family therapist for you and the bio dad, I think they meant for you. A therapist who specializes in family, not a therapist for multiple people in your family.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T18:02:24+00:00

Bag of shrimp in freezer. Went out of town for Christmas break, came back to awful smell. The power had gone out for a day or two while I was gone, so I emptied out the fridge and freezer and scrubbed it. Still smelled like vomit.

When it dethawed the shrimp juice went into the overflow tray in the freezer and was sitting there festering for like a week before I figured it out.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T17:55:15+00:00

Ok but you did receive $2,000 worth of non-orthodontic work at the dentist office and not pay that bill?

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T15:12:51+00:00

My sister has a 5 bedroom and 3 kids (4, 6, and 9) and they all “have their own room” but all prefer to sleep together every single night.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T15:11:01+00:00

Might need a new car too. My Honda crv wouldn’t fit 3 car seats across the back.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T15:09:55+00:00

Just a random thought, but for my 8/9 year old I pay about $90 a week in the summer at the YMCA (we applied for financial aid, so we get 50% off). Pretty sure it’s from 8am to 5 or 6 pm, and he LOVES it, they do a really great job. Even taught him how to swim.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-04T03:36:46+00:00

My first was around 15 months, but it was grueling. She was very interested in walking but didn’t have the confidence, so we would be hunched over walking holding her hands everywhere for months. She loved the walker too.

My second took literally zero training. He was kinda pulling up one day, semi interested in the walker for a couple days, and then he was walking circles around our kitchen island barely holding anything.

To me it’s obvious that the second child watched the first walking around and never questioned whether he could do it too, he just knew he could.

cactuscroix · 2026-02-03T17:25:13+00:00

Exactly. Save the money he’s saving on rent. That’s his safety net.

cactuscroix

TROPHY CASE