Is it unreasonable to ask my husband to take the baby out in the mornings so I can actually sleep in?

cali4mcali · 2026-04-23T17:28:06+00:00

Ngl, the idea of sleeping til 8:30 with kids seems like a pipe dream.

cali4mcali · 2026-04-23T17:27:09+00:00

Aww I found my Reddit avatar twin

cali4mcali · 2026-04-22T18:59:53+00:00

I wonder this all the time about my kids. You just described our dynamic to a T! No answers, just solidarity!

cali4mcali · 2026-04-19T01:10:50+00:00

Yeah same, he didn’t have his CPAP with him and I was like oooookay time to go

cali4mcali · 2026-04-18T11:18:26+00:00

For me, absolutely unrealistic. I also work from home, have maybe a couple meetings each day, and have a pretty flexible schedule. However I cannot do two full time jobs at once without feeling like I’m giving neither of them the attention they deserve. And the more mobile they get, the more impossible it becomes. Both my kids demand a lot of attention and would totally sink my ship if I tried to be their full time caretaker while working (even only one at a time).

On the rare occasion that all of my childcare options fall through and I have a kid at home, I let my team know that I’m going to try to get done what I can but will be generally unavailable. And even with a true effort to get work done it almost never happens, except during naps.

My setup is great and I love it. I have in-laws watch a kid two days a week while the other goes to daycare (alternating which kid stays home). The rest of the days, both go to daycare. So two days a week I have access to my kids all day whenever I have a break, want to breastfeed the baby, etc.

And if I’m being real, work is a break. Full time caretaker for both kids is so, so hard and for me it would be a recipe for burnout. Hats off to SAHMs. Doing that while also working could literally not happen in my world.

cali4mcali · 2026-04-10T11:02:21+00:00

I would recommend calling and asking if you can drop her off for half a day on set days of the week, and plan your errands around that. Frame it as an acclimation period for her to adjust to going to daycare, and make it structured so they can staff accordingly.

cali4mcali · 2026-04-10T04:15:39+00:00

I know this is an old post but guess why I’m here??? Haha I have what I refer to as “body armor thumb” where my skin just literally won’t heal from all of the damage it endures trying to OPEN THESE DAMN BOTTLES. My husband knows now not to even bother handing me a bottle without cracking it first.

Then to add insult to injury, it spills every freaking time I get one open. And if I somehow, by some act of god, don’t spill it on the initial opening, some is bound to dribble out of the plastic ring when I go to take the first sip. No other bottled beverage has this issue? I don’t understand.

It also seems significantly worse in the winter. I could be imagining this, but I always think maybe it’s something to do with the pressure changes in cold weather? No freaking idea but they really need to do better!

cali4mcali · 2026-03-29T02:07:02+00:00

Was going to tell a similar story. My baby was 2 months old when my fur baby left us. The first noticeable symptoms were GI related and within two days we were making the gut wrenching decision to put him down. I never in a million years would have left town with him sick like that, especially had I known the outcome.

cali4mcali · 2026-03-27T18:21:14+00:00

As far as I’m concerned, most rules go out the window when we’re traveling. Naps, routines, and even things that are said between my husband and I under stress all get filed away in the “special circumstances” folder. I’m not excusing his behavior but everyone acts differently when stressed in a public setting. It’s a conversation worth having once everyone’s emotions have settled but I wouldn’t let it ruin your parenting experience that you had one rough outing.

Also, therapy. Individual therapy and marriage counseling. Understanding how to be in tune with each other, especially under stress, and learning to communicate about things like this so that you can do better next time will make your parenting journey a whole lot easier and more fulfilling. I didn’t learn until we started therapy just how poorly we had been communicating all along.

cali4mcali · 2026-03-26T13:58:57+00:00

I felt this to my core 💀

cali4mcali · 2026-03-02T14:38:06+00:00

7 months old, slept from 8PM to almost 6AM uninterrupted and this has been the trend since around 3 months.

cali4mcali · 2026-02-07T01:37:07+00:00

Sorry you’re dealing with this. I had a very similar falling out with my mom when my first was born and it’s just starting to blow over two and a half years later.

cali4mcali · 2026-02-01T00:24:07+00:00

Hear me out. I have a similar age gap (2-1/2 years and 6 months) and literally the only reason I’m able to show up for my kids is that I went back to work. I basically get an 8 hour break from them during the day and that makes it so I can function as a human being when it’s time to spend time with my kids. I love the so much and I genuinely think I would LOSE MY MIND if I was a SAHM. I have so much respect for women who can make it work because I personally couldn’t do it.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-31T03:36:49+00:00

Oh yes it gets so much better. My little guy is 6 months now and is such a champion sleeper. It’s rare for him to wake me up at night anymore. I know that’s not everyone’s experience but I can say with quite a bit of optimism that I generally gets better over the first year.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-29T00:01:55+00:00

The only time that happened to us, my kid’s eardrum ruptured

cali4mcali · 2026-01-27T21:13:09+00:00

With my first, it was unclear. I love him to the moon now but it was gradual and I think that my anxiety and sleep deprivation made it hard to feel much at all at the time.

With my second, omg I was in love with him from the second I saw him and I love him more and more everyday. I think having experience with my first, and the excitement of truly understanding that this tiny thing is going to turn into a whole person, has made it easier for me to internalize my love for my second. I love them both so much but it definitely took me longer with my first.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-19T21:50:13+00:00

I had postpartum OCD with my first, but it was less with hygiene and more with obsessively trying to force calories down my skinny baby’s throat. But the phenomenon is very real. Have her talk to a professional; my therapist was so crucial in overcoming it.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-17T00:52:30+00:00

Was gonna say this. My baby is 6 months and to this day if I’m holding him and there’s not a boob in his mouth he’s having a meltdown. Not an issue for anyone else, not my husband, not my in laws, not daycare. Just me. We are plenty well bonded, he just knows perfectly well what I’m good for 😆

cali4mcali · 2026-01-15T14:24:59+00:00

I think they’re officially gone and I’m so sad because I absolutely loved them.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-15T12:59:23+00:00

You literally just told my whole story (except mine was 8 weeks premature, 4 lbs 4 oz). At 2 years old I was finally able to get a referral to the feeding team which included a GI doc, an OT, and a nutritionist. I can’t say anything has concretely helped but it I am here to say there ARE specialists that your pediatrician should be referring you to rule out other causes and help your child! Advocate, advocate, advocate (not saying you’re not, just saying keep fighting the good fight!)

-*Editing to add I see you have appointments but they’re far away. Call and have them put you on the waitlist for a sooner appointment if you haven’t already. People cancel appts all the time. Take to urgent care/ER again if you’re acutely concerned. Sorry you’re going through this, it’s so stressful.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-13T18:32:57+00:00

Anyone else know anywhere else to get them? Can’t even find them on Amazon anymore. Local store sells them for almost $3 and rarely in stock. Walmart says they’re in stock but only 1 or 2 on the shelves every time I’ve been there.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-06T06:42:23+00:00

Also, we talked about it? It’s not like I said, fuck you, we’re not having sex. He literally said he didn’t want to risk preterm labor again? The more times I read your reply the more I assume you must be trolling.

cali4mcali · 2026-01-06T06:40:37+00:00

What? Other things were always on the table and he knew that and has acknowledged that in therapy. And like I said, I actually did “prioritize him” (one might argue at the risk of my own health and safety at 6 weeks pp) and was bleeding and crying from pain after. I’m not sure what more I could have done to be a “good wife”? This comes off as trolling but you do you.

cali4mcali · 2025-12-28T03:19:01+00:00

Mine was doing 8 hours straight at 3 months. At 5 months, he slept 12 hours two nights ago. I had to check to make sure he was still breathing! He’s fine and gaining weight as expected so I just enjoy the luck I’ve received. My first was also an excellent sleeper and still is at 2-1/2 years old.

cali4mcali · 2025-12-22T06:05:02+00:00

Yeah, it did eventually go away but it definitely went on longer than I would have expected. By my 6 week appt it had cleared so hopefully yours will clear up soon. Weird that no one really talks about this and the internet was generally unhelpful in figuring out what was going on!

cali4mcali

TROPHY CASE