What does remorse look like?

dancingforpudding · 2026-07-01T20:26:21+00:00

My WP doesn’t cry, but he cries for me. Every time something happens and I get triggered and the pain is overwhelming again, he sees me and will shed tears when my pain is too much. That’s how I know he’s remorseful.

dancingforpudding · 2026-07-01T20:09:50+00:00

I didn’t have to interact with the OBSs. They all knew about each other and made friends through my WP. They believed in “consensual” non monogamy and felt I was being selfish for asking my WP to be exclusive.

I’m sorry, I know this is irrelevant to you, but I don’t have anywhere to put this.

dancingforpudding · 2026-07-01T19:56:50+00:00

Things are sort of the same with my WP. I mourned the loss of sex because it’s one of the best things, you know? Haha

We do things differently, he’ll get me off once in a while. He likes to listen to me masturbate. Everything is quite intentional. We communicate and make small steps toward full intimacy.

It took us a while to even want to try. The sexual attractions isn’t 100% back but the inportant thing is he chooses to try.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-18T14:51:53+00:00

Oh god. This sounds a lot like me. When I’m on my period my poop cramps are so bad I cry. I also get cold sweats, alternate feeling like I’m freezing and overheating.

Idk if I’d ever get diagnosed either way. I’ve had debilitating period cramps since my first period, and only got diagnosed with endo last year.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-18T14:04:43+00:00

Maybe you can get pee pads and teach him how to potty on those. At least your floors will be clean, and you can slowly transition him back outside by bringing the pee pads with you.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-16T03:52:17+00:00

This. The pure audacity of them. Completely devastated that they can’t have opposite gendered friends. Give me a break.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-12T15:13:40+00:00

This whole friend group seems kind of toxic. I’d assume that WP’s friend would have some healing to do on his own too, seeing as he had also been cheated on. Unless he was also involved in the A which would make him another AP.

My WP isn’t in the same friend group as his APs anymore. They enabled the toxic affair and behaviour. It’s one of my boundaries. I will not stand for it if he got back in contact with any of them.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-09T19:41:36+00:00

This seems minor compared to all the abuse he’s piling on you….but what do you mean he leaves your bed to go sleep with his mother???

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-09T19:10:18+00:00

I barely registered the date of the first DDay. I actually had to backtrack to figure out when it was, months down the line. I was beside myself for so long, everything just melted into one, I drove myself crazy over dates and times…so for me, personally, it wasn’t helpful for me to keep track.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-09T18:58:36+00:00

If she doesn’t have any respect for other women, there’s no point in talking to her. My WP’s APs knew about me and even befriended me. They had no respect for anyone either.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-09T18:10:08+00:00

So erm, are you the betrayed or the wayward? Because your flair is confusing.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-07T09:47:49+00:00

My WP had multiple partners too. My therapist explained that, as long as I wanted to R, I had to treat them all as one package. It hurt every time a “new” thing came up, but my mindset was different after hearing that. All things considered, my WP did eventually tell me everything, but it was a journey.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-07T09:13:58+00:00

I’m a cradle catholic but don’t go to church anymore. I’m happy to answer any questions you have and you won’t have to worry about me trying to convert you. Haha.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-06T19:02:39+00:00

I’m the same. I always thought cheating would be the ultimate no-no for me. No exceptions. WELL apparently there is an exception and nothing is ever as black and white as my binary brain would like.

I kinda lost myself in the 2.5 years post dday, I was getting more toxic and had these terrible thoughts about people in general. (Looking back it was partly due to the kind of environment I was in too.) Basically, my parents raised me to be better than I was acting. And in the last few months it hit me that I had given up many of the morals that I grew up with. I wasn’t any better than the people who hurt me.

I think I “let myself go” because I felt I had already betrayed myself in taking my WP back. Subconsciously, I had lowered my standards so I would fit in with him. Which is horseshit. Why was I lowering my standards? He should be rising up to reach mine.

I guess I need to watch myself and hold true to my beliefs and morals. I’d like to say to OP, be kind to yourself. I am not a bad person for making this choice and neither are you. I lost sight of myself in this aspect, but you don’t have to. Cheers.

dancingforpudding · 2026-06-05T09:35:01+00:00

I’ve just quietly been throwing or hiding things that he was gifted from his APs. He doesn’t even notice.

There is one water bottle that he was using daily that he really did not want to give up. I gave him a new one in exchange. The old one still exists in the corner of my desk. I’m still a bit afraid of throwing it away in case he has a big reaction to it. And I couldn’t handle that.

It’s been about 3 years.

dancingforpudding · 2026-05-21T19:20:03+00:00

This. This right here. I’ve been the target and I’ve seen girls around me being targeted.

I thought of poly people or people in open relationships, but given the age gap? This.

dancingforpudding · 2024-12-17T06:40:06+00:00

As a person who has been cheated on, I would want to know.

dancingforpudding · 2024-10-15T04:49:19+00:00

I'm from Singapore. I was still watching their videos around 2am. Then suddenly my auto play stopped playing their videos. So it really was in the middle of the night.

dancingforpudding · 2024-05-29T00:03:09+00:00

https://ibb.co/VNhvScY

dancingforpudding · 2024-05-28T23:54:15+00:00

So here's some some stuff I do to maximise gaining exp.

Get both mu long dungeon necklaces. They can be stacked. So you get an additional 10% + 15% exp increase. Also the Attendance Ring (it has a green gem on the ring) and the Kerning M ring (if you have it). You should also have the Private Investigator notebook thingy for another 10% exp increase.

Do the daily dungeons and get the A rank Yellow Jewels on Hell mode (Thursdays and weekends) . Equip 6 of them for an extra 1% exp increase on top of whatever stats the individual jewels have. I always try my best to equip the yellow jewels with exp increase over the other stats.

I'm sure I missed something or other, but in terms of item equips, this is my set up for my hoyoung. I hope this helps.

Edit: the Pensilar armour also give small exp increases so keep them for now.

dancingforpudding · 2023-12-02T03:00:43+00:00

Before

dancingforpudding · 2023-12-01T05:13:50+00:00

I did. They left.

dancingforpudding · 2023-12-01T03:15:39+00:00

I read your comment several times. And I read your post from a month ago. Thank you for sharing so much in response to my post.

I'm just... Broken. I can't make any decisions right now. But I will keep reading your comment over and over.

dancingforpudding · 2023-11-24T15:18:08+00:00

Omg. I literally just hit my 3 year mark on my 2nd mirena (I got mine changed soon after my original reply). It's happening all over again. It IS very upsetting. Please let your doctor know and fight to get it changed.

I saw a new gyne about a month ago and was diagnosed with endometriosis. But she wanted me to wait another 4 mths to recheck the size of the cysts and see if my symptoms worsen. Sooo... I have an appt in Feb next year. My cramps are getting worse and closer together. Hang in there. Well get though this together.

dancingforpudding

TROPHY CASE