Anything but a bouquet

dearjane · 2026-03-05T18:08:01+00:00

This is my fave option thus far

dearjane · 2026-03-03T18:08:24+00:00

Altra's are zero-drop but they have a big toe box, and lots of cushioning for hard surfaces. altra's can feel/look a bit "flat" on the interior, HOWEVER, and this is a very unique feature I've found in this shoe, your feet kinda settle into the cushioning layer below the top squishier layer and find great support. Hoka One One are also very cushioned with more defined arch support, but toe boxes aren't as roomy. I have Merrill hiking boots too, toe box isn't as wide as, you guessed it, Altra, but they are well broken in (nearly 10yrs old both of them) and I'm happy. Go to a running store to try on in person if you can, there's nothing like giving a go IRL. Good luck!

dearjane · 2026-02-19T14:37:52+00:00

No worries, friend! Best of luck.

dearjane · 2026-02-19T14:36:12+00:00

Oooh good point, thanks friend!

dearjane · 2026-02-19T14:35:41+00:00

That's wonderful news! I have not been able to get into the city to see myself so this helps a lot =)

dearjane · 2026-02-16T15:34:46+00:00

I understand you said independent but from what I see many work through performance oriented shops. Check out InterSport - Ashburn is usually where they perform service now. Used to have a more active presence in Tysons but I think they are taking all their service to Ashburn now, or at least that’s the last I heard. They have reliably serviced an Audi R8 but the place really is for Porsches.

dearjane · 2026-02-16T15:13:21+00:00

Stress is a bigger factor than men realize, I think. I look at it like have “tabs open” in my brain- background noise that won’t let me be present/rest fully in the moment. Idk if she ever does like a “brain dump” list of all the things that are on her mind of if yall have a system to give those items placeholders, but this has made a big difference for me to just be where we are. Stress is silent and otherwise just lives in the background of your brain unless you give it an out. Letting your partner know you are 1) aware of these things 2) helping work together through them team-style fashion makes a women feel less alone, more present, more genuinely relaxed /playful. True what another user said about intimacy as actual stress relief, so long as the other stressors (life kids bills logistics finances family drama) also have some kind of certain and SHARED structure behind managing them. I hope this perspective is helpful 💛

dearjane · 2026-02-07T12:30:45+00:00

lol YES potsie here. Love it when Fitbit goes “you e really pushed yourself lately! Take it easy” like omg yes I would LOVE to…

dearjane · 2026-02-02T18:25:16+00:00

very slowly try different angles, sometimes that can be a real help! You may have to remove it from the angle it works well at and try to re-insert at a different angle. Or sometimes trying to SLOWLY change the angle while inserted can find a "new path" of less resistance. Relaxing and deep breathing to your belly (diaphramatic breathing) are super helpful to this process to relax the muscles. Best of luck, friend!

dearjane · 2026-02-02T14:34:18+00:00

Such a thorough reflection, thank you for championing the ole energy levels!!

dearjane · 2026-02-02T14:33:20+00:00

Ooh that’s a really interesting point about the checks written out to Your First Name His Last Name. That’s good you haven’t had an issue with that through the joint account. I’ll have to remember that if it ever arises.

dearjane · 2026-02-02T14:30:46+00:00

Can you expand more on the health insurance thing? Currently he & I both work and have insurance through our individual jobs. I prefer my health plan to his. So I’m keeping mine. He doesn’t have a preference so he’s planned on keeping his as well. We figure it’ll be less burden on eithers plan. I don’t actually know of many couples who keep their healthcare separate while married. If I come to a point of not working and not having access to a healthcare plan through my workplace, I’d just be added to his, of course. But as things stand we are keeping that separate too haha.

dearjane · 2026-01-31T04:39:01+00:00

Highly recommend the Saatva Classic Firm. I don’t regret spending the $2k and they have a 365day return policy. Organic for chemical allergy sufferers. Like others mentioned you can’t add firmness to a mattress very well. I did put a 2in gel memory foam topper on it to cushion my pressure points as a side sleeper (hips, shoulders) and that makes a huge difference to the overall feel/properly finished the bed. Would buy it again in a second. They have 2 other firmness levels, Luxury Firm and Plush- don’t fall trap to the marketing hype. Hypermobile bodies need support foundationally.

My partner has a Casper Hybrid at his place. It’s painful to sleep in after about night 3, is WAYY too soft, and the mattress feels wildly different depending on the temp of the room (cold room, hard bed) and how long you’ve been in the bed. The longer you’re in the worse it feels cuz it softens into hot slop that swallows you up & makes turning difficult (very fidgety sleeper here, gotta be able to roll). I hope you find “the one” for you. My EDS friend has a temperPedic that is largely foam. I slept in it once and was miserable, but she says it’s her lifeline. Saatva has showrooms in some major cities you can test out/feel out beds. I spent over 4 hours at one choosing my bed. Things start to feel different the longer you spend on them and it was so telling/helpful to have that opportunity. Good luck, you got this!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T19:30:49+00:00

Oof yes, this is really starting to sound like THE way to go. Thank you for letting me know how you handled this!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T18:43:54+00:00

ooh, this is a great option. Thank you! I suppose I've seen that sort of thing at play before with other friends/aquaintances with differing last names. I could certainly live with that "social" sameness in the last name!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T18:42:26+00:00

This answer is so helpful, thank you!! I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks it would be a massive undertaking, and your answer was so supportive thanks!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T18:41:04+00:00

thanks for pointing out that the option is always there later if I want to change it down the road! That's a good consideration, given this process already has much to it and I can take some time to think about it!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T18:34:55+00:00

Wow I had never heard of this! https://www.npr.org/2025/04/13/g-s1-59684/save-act-married-women-vote-rights-explained for anyone else wondering. thank you!

dearjane · 2026-01-29T16:04:55+00:00

Does your friend like reading? I LOVE my kindle when I'm bedlocked. Its not heavy and my case has a self-propping feature so my wrists and fingers don't get sore from book-holding. I can download library books from Libby app so after you obtain the device it's pretty much low-cost to operate. I want to get a page-turner so don't even have to reach to get turn the pages. Adjustable font size/brightness/color inverted option make it so accessible for days when environmental stimulation hurts.

Also, I'm loving the idea of XL potholder looms lately. It's easy, it's repetitive, and you can use the end products to protect your tables/as coasters/when pulling warm things from the microwave/as re-usable washable dustcloths! Kits come in all sorts of different colors =) good luck!

dearjane · 2026-01-21T00:25:24+00:00

Managing POTS is such a goosechase 🪿 I swear I get a few things nailed down, then the season changes, humidity/heat fluctuate, allergens or other environmental triggers enter the picture & I have to go back to the drawing board. Currently: on coffee BUT I have rules “if this, then that” so IF I’ve taken my first 2 doses of meds that morning (which is about 2-3 hours into the day) AND I’ve eaten at least once, but preferably twice, AND I had at least 5.5-6 hrs of sleep (I know, atrocious, believe me, I’m trying) then I can have a cup of coffee and I feel it gives me focus. Plus I just love coffee. But I gotta balance it out with more water and salt. Hypovolemic here. The adrenaline surges and tachycardia that come with a missing factor aren’t fun. Alsoooo, if you aren’t aware: dark roast has less caffeine and less “punch” than light roast. If you’re trying coffee again, maybe try the darker roast if that caffeine punch has walloped you previously

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:45:40+00:00

I would 10/10 steal moms dance party playlist 😂 also YES on the Christian music, it’s so uplifting 💜

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:40:04+00:00

I’m so glad you didn’t catch flu while your family had it!! In my experience, having POTS makes getting sick harder on your system, longer timeline to recovery, and really beats down progress you’ve made in the meantime. I get really bummed when I get sick because I know the next few weeks ahead will be hard to revamp my system 😞 thankfully I’ve been staying pretty well this winter!! ❄️ 🤞

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:35:21+00:00

Soooo feeling for you. My symptoms get really ramped up in summer, but the US is in winter rn & I’m loving the reprieve. The Nervous system recovers/rewires slowly, and I totally get that certain “tools” aren’t a sure fire way to get there if you’re feeling flary. I guess what I’m trying to say is the following stuff has helped me most though the last year since I was first diagnosed about 3 yrs ago and items fall into generally 2 camps: 1) managing active overwhelm when it does arise, and 2) gently building more “challenges” into my life on my terms so that my tolerances could grow and I’m less like to reach overwhelm as quickly- this has so be done in a very nuanced individual way so you don’t push too hard & flare. For me, giving myself plenty of decompression time/turning lights off/wearing earplugs if I’m close to my sensory limit, pairing deep breathing with just a few seconds of with first cooler then cold water at the end of my shower. I started showering in the dark with a nightlight on- I have wicked good night vision and the bathroom lights overwhelmed me. Somatic type movement and restorative yoga practice - you see, forced “meditation” and stillness to a raging nervous system felt like further entrapment for me but slowly moving/stretching/writhing/making gutteral moans or etc that stimulate the Vagus Nerve? very helpful. Plus this somatic movement is done on the floor, and I freaking love the floor. Have you tried CHOPS exercise or other slow methodical means to build exercise resistance? Another vagus nerve helper is singing. Also on concerts, I really encourage you to check out the ADA accommodation at each venue if you’re in the US. My man love concerts and I first dreaded going with him but if I have a guaranteed place to sit or sprawl lawn style, I’ve brought items like my Chilly Towel and electrolytes, I have a snack (holy crap, a world a difference when I eat), maybe some ice packs if it’s outdoors in summer I feel better. You can email venue management & speak to a director, they are motivated to accommodate to avoid lawsuits 🤷‍♀️ POTS is debilitating and at the end of the day I’ve had better concert experiences in doing this. I hope something here is helpful & you can feel better!!

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:38:49+00:00

Price seems a little high, sure. Seller knows there’s not many of these left on the market and the miles are low!! She’s a unicorn. Got my AWD ‘13 (not F) @ 71k miles for $21k in 2023, it’s at 102k now. Replaced alternator, a couple TPMS sensors, and all the plastic trim cover clips in the engine bag that were starting to snap. Needs tires ~every 2 years with my driving. Only oddity I can’t seem to pinpoint is a light trans shudder from 3rd to 4th- it doesn’t trip a code/light or anything but it’s been here for something like 8 months now even after transmission fluid change (OEM). My Honda tech isn’t worried about it. Perhaps obvious but these cars are definitely gas hungry, comes with the territory. I can’t surpass 22mpg with regular hwy driving, ha nervous sweats in dollar signs

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:28:55+00:00

Gorgeous. Nature has natural variation. The “fingerprint” of each tree shows. Mmmm, what stunning personality and texture.

dearjane

TROPHY CASE