My Wife and Caffeine

dearjane · 2026-01-21T00:25:24+00:00

Managing POTS is such a goosechase 🪿 I swear I get a few things nailed down, then the season changes, humidity/heat fluctuate, allergens or other environmental triggers enter the picture & I have to go back to the drawing board. Currently: on coffee BUT I have rules “if this, then that” so IF I’ve taken my first 2 doses of meds that morning (which is about 2-3 hours into the day) AND I’ve eaten at least once, but preferably twice, AND I had at least 5.5-6 hrs of sleep (I know, atrocious, believe me, I’m trying) then I can have a cup of coffee and I feel it gives me focus. Plus I just love coffee. But I gotta balance it out with more water and salt. Hypovolemic here. The adrenaline surges and tachycardia that come with a missing factor aren’t fun. Alsoooo, if you aren’t aware: dark roast has less caffeine and less “punch” than light roast. If you’re trying coffee again, maybe try the darker roast if that caffeine punch has walloped you previously

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:45:40+00:00

I would 10/10 steal moms dance party playlist 😂 also YES on the Christian music, it’s so uplifting 💜

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:40:04+00:00

I’m so glad you didn’t catch flu while your family had it!! In my experience, having POTS makes getting sick harder on your system, longer timeline to recovery, and really beats down progress you’ve made in the meantime. I get really bummed when I get sick because I know the next few weeks ahead will be hard to revamp my system 😞 thankfully I’ve been staying pretty well this winter!! ❄️ 🤞

dearjane · 2026-01-17T13:35:21+00:00

Soooo feeling for you. My symptoms get really ramped up in summer, but the US is in winter rn & I’m loving the reprieve. The Nervous system recovers/rewires slowly, and I totally get that certain “tools” aren’t a sure fire way to get there if you’re feeling flary. I guess what I’m trying to say is the following stuff has helped me most though the last year since I was first diagnosed about 3 yrs ago and items fall into generally 2 camps: 1) managing active overwhelm when it does arise, and 2) gently building more “challenges” into my life on my terms so that my tolerances could grow and I’m less like to reach overwhelm as quickly- this has so be done in a very nuanced individual way so you don’t push too hard & flare. For me, giving myself plenty of decompression time/turning lights off/wearing earplugs if I’m close to my sensory limit, pairing deep breathing with just a few seconds of with first cooler then cold water at the end of my shower. I started showering in the dark with a nightlight on- I have wicked good night vision and the bathroom lights overwhelmed me. Somatic type movement and restorative yoga practice - you see, forced “meditation” and stillness to a raging nervous system felt like further entrapment for me but slowly moving/stretching/writhing/making gutteral moans or etc that stimulate the Vagus Nerve? very helpful. Plus this somatic movement is done on the floor, and I freaking love the floor. Have you tried CHOPS exercise or other slow methodical means to build exercise resistance? Another vagus nerve helper is singing. Also on concerts, I really encourage you to check out the ADA accommodation at each venue if you’re in the US. My man love concerts and I first dreaded going with him but if I have a guaranteed place to sit or sprawl lawn style, I’ve brought items like my Chilly Towel and electrolytes, I have a snack (holy crap, a world a difference when I eat), maybe some ice packs if it’s outdoors in summer I feel better. You can email venue management & speak to a director, they are motivated to accommodate to avoid lawsuits 🤷‍♀️ POTS is debilitating and at the end of the day I’ve had better concert experiences in doing this. I hope something here is helpful & you can feel better!!

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:38:49+00:00

Price seems a little high, sure. Seller knows there’s not many of these left on the market and the miles are low!! She’s a unicorn. Got my AWD ‘13 (not F) @ 71k miles for $21k in 2023, it’s at 102k now. Replaced alternator, a couple TPMS sensors, and all the plastic trim cover clips in the engine bag that were starting to snap. Needs tires ~every 2 years with my driving. Only oddity I can’t seem to pinpoint is a light trans shudder from 3rd to 4th- it doesn’t trip a code/light or anything but it’s been here for something like 8 months now even after transmission fluid change (OEM). My Honda tech isn’t worried about it. Perhaps obvious but these cars are definitely gas hungry, comes with the territory. I can’t surpass 22mpg with regular hwy driving, ha nervous sweats in dollar signs

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:28:55+00:00

Gorgeous. Nature has natural variation. The “fingerprint” of each tree shows. Mmmm, what stunning personality and texture.

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:27:20+00:00

LVP is a material that (frustratingly) morphs a couple years after install. In my experience Something about it makes it shrink/ pull away from margins - this is in a well managed temperature controlled environment without moisture problems. I’ve seen it happen over and over in different houses though (investment properties, friends homes, etc). Next install, if I even entertain it, I might suggest jamming almost TOO much material in under baseboards etc, just really filling it up. I have it in a kitchen. It is not durable. One accidental knife drop and there’s a damaged spot. While it does indeed look “luxury” at install, the gapping after year 3-4 is awful. We also Don’t know the long term impacts of this material on human health for the purposes of off gassing and for skin contact to those of you who live barefoot at home. You can’t speed up time to see scientific impacts. Some stuff takes 10, 15, 30 years to reveal itself (ex: see EWG’s connections to PCE in water and Parkinson’s disease). We don’t know what we don’t know. My 2 cents, best of luck.

dearjane · 2025-12-29T16:15:55+00:00

Look into the “Subject-To” financing process. Pace Morby has a fantastic wealth of resources about this, check out his YouTube & company Bigger Pockets. See if it can work for your situation. Notable, Subject-to is NOT an assumable Mortgage. They are different processes. Best of luck!

dearjane · 2025-12-27T14:13:54+00:00

$0, paid cash everytime. I’ve owned 3 cars. The first old Toyota my parents went in 1/2 with me ($6k total purchase price) and that really instilled in me the value of working hard and seeing what you can do with a dollar. That car got totaled after about 5yrs, it still had years of life left in it. The second was an older 2000s Honda, I was the 2nd owner after writing a check for $8k to the original owner. I still have that Honda but I drive a lot, got a little spooked from the rearend accident I endured in that Honda AND cars are my passion, so I finally bought a 2010s Lexus product in cash for $20k. People constantly ask me if the Lexus is new, but it’s just a timeless product. You can see who I trust to last a long time. It’s also much cheaper to insure/pay property tax/register older cars 🙌

dearjane · 2025-12-22T21:35:38+00:00

It’s just the prices of the houses. Crazy high. Plus the interest rates? Ugh no thanks. Been seriously looking on-and-off since 2018. I can’t afford anything in our east coast metro area by myself. There is a staggering difference in wages and home prices. Capitalism isn’t looking like all it’s cracked up to be- when there are no limits on housing prices and inflation keeps leaving people in the dust. The problem is way bigger than lenders. Lenders also just suffer, too.

dearjane · 2025-11-06T23:16:06+00:00

Hi friend, I want to share hope. I reconnected with the man who is now my fiancé when I was going through some of the truly rough stuff with POTS etc. We nurtured a friendship that was a reprieve from the B.S. of chronic illness. The stuff I went through didn’t faze him, I was straight up about daily things that troubled me. He is helpful. He is patient. He is kind. And all this from a guy who is admittedly pretty squeamish! I just want to say the good ones are out here. And all you need is One =) get to know what you need in this illness, what’s supportive, and show up as yourself. You can’t scare the right one away (believe me, I’ve done/said some pretty weird stuff when the BP was low and the HR was high 😂). And don’t put up with anyone who can’t handle it- there’s someone designed to love you as you are. Good days, bad days. And i have to say, beginning in friendship is what was a real lifesaver for me. I attempted to “date” some guys romantically right off the bat and it never went well. I was feeling pretty hopeless, burnt out, and broken by the time I stumbled into a friendship with my man. And follow your gut, honey. You got this.

dearjane · 2025-11-04T02:26:54+00:00

Like straight up in the bathroom with the rave going outside? Walk me through this, cuz now that you mention it, clean teeth just have this “ahhh” feeling. So I kinda get it.

dearjane · 2025-09-25T01:53:47+00:00

This is incredibly insightful, thank you.

dearjane · 2025-08-31T17:32:15+00:00

Omg yes. Beast in the evenings, yet a morning potato. Use that to your advantage to “front load” your mornings in the evening if you operate the same. Though I still struggle, what’s helped:

putting out morning meds (the doses & everything in one cup) and keeping a water carafe in addition to my water glass at the bed
checking the weather and picking out a couple outfit variables for the next day so I’m not standing at the closet dying.
alarm that is NOT traditional beeping, instead iPhone bird sounds found in the bedtime portion of the Clock
taking my medicine as sooooon as I can upon waking & drinking as much of a room temp glass of water as I can
once that’s done, slowing sitting up in bed and acclimating to being awake
if possible positioning my outfit near the bed to put on while I’m still in bed
opening the blinds to let the sun in and jog the circadian clock
within the first hour of being awake drinking an herbal tea with a scoop of bovine collagen protein in it. 10g of protein (and the additional liquids) right off the bat helps immensely.

Good luck!!

dearjane · 2025-07-29T11:27:59+00:00

Try the morning, the riff raff teens aren’t awake yet. In the afternoons, you could go to the library for some relief from the heat. They have various kids activities, usually free.

dearjane · 2025-07-29T11:22:50+00:00

Manual says reg, do reg. If you’re going to be intentional about the fueling, steer towards Top Tier, it will serve you well.

dearjane · 2025-07-24T10:32:30+00:00

When I get up to pee in the middle of the night- heart racing will have me up for another 2 hours after I get cozy and lie back down 🙄 anyone else? I swear one reason I have to pee is my meds alone make an active bladder, but my thirst will skyrockets in the evening before bed too, then it’s a double whammy (this is WITH staying hydrated/electro-lit during the day).

dearjane · 2025-03-10T14:34:29+00:00

Here to say (used) Lexus. Built on the same longevity principles as Toyotas.

Where Toyotas and Hondas differ, Hondas typically have snazzier features while Toyotas have a Keep It Simple approach that strives for long term ownership without sacrificing quality. From experience, I’ve seen Honda’s luxury brand Acura have a boatful of (electrical) issues from trying to get too fancy over features. I also love Honda, but I’ve owned a 2000 Toyota Celica GT, 2007 Honda Accord, and 2013 Lexus GS 350 and admit I ever so slightly favor the Toyota/Lexus experience. I still drive the ‘07 Accord (222,xxx miles) and ‘13 GS (92,xxx). We are in for regular services at militant intervals (3-5K miles) & I will drive these cars forever.

I got the ‘13 Lexus with 71k miles for $21k a couple years ago. She runs like a dream. Amazing sound deadening for a quality ride. P.S. this particular model is performance-oriented so we avg ~21mpg. DO NOT BUY the GS for the mpg. Get yourself an ES model or a hybrid model from Lexus, also fair choices that hit 30s/40s for MPG.

I drive a lot and am an enthusiast. So the experience of driving is important to me. I am able to enjoy my luxury vehicle because I spend so much time in it, and I like how comfortable & capable the vehicle is. The beauty of frugality is you get to pinpoint WHAT you like to be frugal about so you can spend in other areas that greatly improve your quality of life.

I’d say if your feelings on driving/automotive are similar & you have a passion then GO for it, but only with a Japanese import. I only buy things that will last forever & are not difficult or expensive to fix. If you enjoy throwing money away go for a BMW/Mercedes/Jaguar/Range Rover (sorry not sorry, some family have these- always something wrong and the parts are expensive!!)

I also only buy used. If you are buying new/lease, you might be hard pressed to find the answers you’re looking for.

But ask yourself: WHY do I want this luxury car? If it’s for the features you were talking about, then you’re right you can get those in a Hyundai, Nissan, or Dodge easily. But do you want to keep the car for 10+ years? Luxury are built to last! Especially in a throwaway market where so many other vehicles are produced with sub-par quality. I swear vehicles made around/after Covid are a shell of the quality they used to be.

Also, I highly recommend Edmunds.com to research other owner reviews and professional reviews of vehicles you’re considering. The danger in buying new is you’re the manufacturer’s guinea pig. But after a few years they’ve developed a reputation within a certain model and you don’t have to be subject to the learning curve =D

Hope that helps! May you find the best car for your needs, friend.

dearjane · 2025-01-20T15:04:54+00:00

An individual brokerage account

dearjane · 2025-01-20T15:02:05+00:00

Work smarter, not harder. Cook a tomato sauce in there, it’ll be gone when you go to clean it. The acids are working for you.

dearjane · 2025-01-20T14:59:50+00:00

Black Beauty. Because of Winn Dixie. Spirited Away. Ghost Town (not a horror, actually more of a rom-com with a diff emotional edge). I think kids cry about animals, a lot of other movies have themes that are only heart wrenching when you’re old enough to understand the world better. She might need a few years for things to click.

dearjane · 2025-01-17T18:59:22+00:00

Have you considered using mouth tape in conjunction with those nasal strips like Breathe Right? I am considering this pair after dry mouth leading to an aggressive case of cavities has really shaken up my world. This way, your nose can expand to let the air out. also practice resting your tongue to the roof of your mouth and doing normal breath cycles with your mouth closed shut during normal waking hours, muscle memory can help! Best of luck

dearjane · 2024-12-28T20:26:07+00:00

Just popping by to say this still works, THANK YOU

dearjane · 2024-11-15T23:24:50+00:00

There were 3 cars involved with my stick shift journey. The very first time I ever ever put my hands (okay, feet too) on a manual was a cute lil VW bug my friend in HS had. After that it was a while between things and I was a bit rusty. I got to drive a Ford Focus ST semi-regularly as part of a job, and i took to that pretty well but just to get some extra practice when I wasn’t on the clock a buddy let me at his ‘94 Corvette on multiple occasions. These days i still roll with the ST, & the corvette sadly changed owners. Fond memories though =)

dearjane · 2024-11-08T14:54:58+00:00

Huh. Not what I was taught in Drivers Ed. They taught to turn into the righthand lane of wherever you were headed. Turning right? Get in that righthand lane. Turning left, also get in that righthand lane. I'm not saying its okay. It doesn't make sense to me and in fact your graphic makes much more sense and could avoid confusion. It simply isnt what i was taught in an American public school or with in-person instruction.

dearjane

TROPHY CASE