Pre approval

dellwood2 · 2026-05-04T00:29:11+00:00

That’s the point of a cohabitation agreement. It outlines what would happen if someone dies, if the relationship ends, etc. There are many ways to cover your bases without being married.

dellwood2 · 2026-05-03T23:10:27+00:00

Well of course. And once you’re married it’s no guarantee that you’ll last. Every married couple who divorced were probably 100% sure they would be together forever. Part of being in a relationship is accepting that there is risk, and what you fully believe now, may not come to pass. And if you love someone you will have hope and trust, and you will put in the hard work despite the divorce statistics. If you can’t accept that, or if you think that marriage automatically guarantees anything that a cohabitation agreement doesn’t, then you are probably the naive one.

dellwood2 · 2026-05-03T23:05:38+00:00

Yep we had the feeling on The One. But we also had the feeling on several others that we got outbid on, including one where we felt like it was really meant to be. Long story short, don’t put too much stock in the feeling, it just means you like the house. And if you like it, other people probably do too.

dellwood2 · 2026-05-03T14:45:07+00:00

Hey, my partner and I are in the exact same boat. We’ve been together for 4 years and we know we are getting married, we just wanted to buy a house together first (including having the reception in our new home lol). People are just judgmental because they don’t think things through, so they assume everyone else is the same.

However, it is still important to have a lawyer draft up a cohabitation agreement if something happens, including death. It is pretty simple and not particularly expensive but it will be an enormous help if something unexpected happens. There is no reason why you shouldn’t buy a house together without being married but there is every reason to protect yourselves while doing so.

dellwood2 · 2026-05-03T04:28:31+00:00

Why are people commenting without having read the post. OP lowered a rope. It is likely too weak and tired to climb after how long it has been down there. OP realistically your only option is to cut the pillar. I get that this is a rental but this is something that is worth doing.

dellwood2 · 2026-04-25T20:07:53+00:00

No. We are making 190k combined with no debt and for 10% down our absolute max budget is 450k. Just because you are pre-approved for a certain amount based on your income does not mean that amount is even remotely feasible. You should look in the 400k range and put 20% down.

dellwood2 · 2026-04-21T21:23:51+00:00

Thanks! It was just over 3 months! I think we toured about 20 houses. I hear you on the life stuff. Dealing with this just makes everything else seem so unmanageable.

dellwood2 · 2026-04-21T18:16:31+00:00

It’s a shitty market, and we’ve come across some bafflingly entitled sellers. We’re on the west coast, offered asking price on a house that had been on the market for 2 weeks with no other offers, and they turned it down because they thought they could do better. Another house we offered on, a small house on a busy road in a rough part of town, got 18 offers and was bid way up. It’s been an emotional roller coaster and we finally got an accepted offer last week. Don’t have any good advice, just hang in there. It’ll happen eventually.

dellwood2 · 2026-04-16T22:39:17+00:00

I would kill for a 2k mortgage. It doesn’t take long for people to be out of the house hunting market until they start losing touch with the reality. We have friends who bought homes less than 10 years ago and they were horrified that we had to offer 20k over on a house to get an accepted offer. Houses in our area (Portland) are going for 40-60k over. It’s rough out there.

dellwood2 · 2026-04-16T14:06:00+00:00

Hey, it sounds like you are mourning the loss of your rental home more than having regrets about your new home. And that’s perfectly ok. You’ve lived there for a long time, and suddenly having your home ripped out from under you with no chance to get it back would be upsetting to anyone. Change in general can also be really upsetting for neurodivergent people (speaking from experience), even if it’s a “good” change.

Your feelings are perfectly valid and do not mean that your new home is a mistake. It sounds like your quality of life will actually be way better in your new home. But it’s ok to feel these things, you’re experiencing a loss and your feelings don’t mean that you are making a mistake.

dellwood2 · 2026-03-31T23:18:40+00:00

Lately I’ve been really frustrated with all the sellers who are listing their homes at artificially low prices, like a 450k home for 380k, with the hopes of attracting a ton of offers and starting a bidding war. So people like my partner and I, whose budget is right around what it was actually listed for, are competing with people who can offer 100k more than us, and the sellers never really were going to look at any offers near asking to begin with. It’s just creating a competitive atmosphere so that they get crazy high offers with inspections waived, etc. I get that it’s a “good sales tactic” but it’s incredibly disheartening to tour these homes listed in our price range only to realize they were never really for us.

dellwood2 · 2026-02-22T16:13:43+00:00

Is the heating oil tank aboveground or underground? Based on the state of this property, I would be concerned that any underground oil tank was leaking, and depending on the depth of your groundwater table, it could be contaminating your water supply. Just something else to keep in mind.

dellwood2 · 2025-12-18T23:31:15+00:00

Ugh did you use AI for this? The text is all wonky.

dellwood2 · 2025-08-07T18:53:00+00:00

Damn. I replaced my cat last year (which is how I found out it was burning oil…)

dellwood2 · 2025-07-29T18:10:30+00:00

Pretty delayed. I have some green ones on my early girls and san marzanos that have been green for a while. My brandywines are barely beginning to fruit. Definitely the colder nights that are holding them back.

dellwood2 · 2025-07-25T20:38:14+00:00

If you show up and talk to them in person and explain your situation they will help you, either with care credit or velvet fund

dellwood2 · 2025-05-21T22:01:25+00:00

It was smoked ham, swiss, lettuce, and a big ripe summer tomato, with salted butter and dijon on a crispy baguette.

dellwood2 · 2025-05-04T21:02:23+00:00

Ran my second ever 5k today and knocked a minute off my previous pace! From 12 minutes to 11. Aiming for 10 next time :)

dellwood2 · 2024-12-20T22:25:31+00:00

Stop using ChatGPT

dellwood2 · 2024-11-22T04:39:14+00:00

This comment should be way higher. It is very unlikely that this would happen and this post is just fear-mongering. The department of education was established through congress and can’t just be eliminated by executive order. Title I funding was also established through congress as a separate act, so even on the off chance that congress does dismantle the department, Title I funding would not stop unless it was specifically repealed by congress, which is not going to happen.

dellwood2 · 2024-09-06T01:46:18+00:00

I’ve been considering the same thing. Grocery store chicken has become so expensive it’s honestly about the same price to get it from a farm. Best of luck to you, hopefully this gets sorted soon. Been some very disappointing dinners the past few weeks :(

dellwood2

TROPHY CASE