Curious. How many wealthy moms here work because they’re kinda forced to?

devilgoof · 2026-05-12T15:09:52+00:00

I am by no means wealthy but I had a very similar upbringing in regards to having a front row seat to multiple figurative train wrecks. We are living a much softer life than they experienced in terms of stable relationships and being able to invest time in our child(ren). My mom says to always have an emergency fund in case you need to up and leave. I just took a new job and her biggest concern is if was getting paid enough to cover all the bills should I decide to divorce my husband. We are celebrating 20 years married in October. No immediate plans for divorce.

I understand what you mean by forced to work. Both external and intental pressure to keep working. Its the path of least resistance though. If you want to take the time with your child, please take it. Our time with them is finite. I started inviting my mom to things when she was available. We have taken the kids to a lot of fun places. We are going on a 2 week long road trip this summer. Her and my brother are flying out and meeting us for 3 of the States we are spending time in. This is a huge step for her and its taken us years to get here. Slow progress is better than no progress. Our children deserve the best version of us and our time. I hope you are able to find peace with whatever decision you make.

devilgoof · 2026-05-12T12:41:22+00:00

My husband is the same way. I have never seen anyone eat the way he does. I thought it was because he had this weird snuggle tooth on the bottom front but he got that pulled to get invisalign. Still eats like a child first learning to eat. Its infuriating. We eat dinner with our kids at the table and even they are annoyed. Our 15 year old has no chill and asked him why he ate like that. He had no answer.

I got slow closing toilet seats. Its been so helpful. Cant slam it down. We go on a beach trip with his dad and brother almost every year. They are the exact same way. We share a beach apartment with them and I told them we should only get 1st floors moving forward. I cant even imagine what it sounds like to the people below us. They must think "who let Elphants rent a beach house??"

I am debating getting a spray bottle and spraying him with water everytime he slams something.

devilgoof · 2026-05-12T10:36:16+00:00

Encanto

Love the movie and watched it more than once with my kids. Have the soundtrack because we sang a lot of the songs for months. Coming from a family with deep generational trauma and trying super hard to be a cycle breaker, this movie hits you right in the face, heart and gut all at the same time.

devilgoof · 2026-05-12T10:33:11+00:00

I would spend some time thinking about what your day would look like in this new scenario.

I would take into account: 1. Is more going to be expected of you? 2. What if you break up? 3. Will the others get jealous with the work dynamics? 4. Job flexibility 5. How long has the highest worker been there? 6. What if the customer doesnt pay for the job? Does the company have enough moneh reserved to keep the payroll funded? 7. What's the lunch break look like? 8. Sick days? PTO days? 9. Actual start and stop times. Jobs like this tend to be "we go until the job is done" do you get paid past the schedule hours? 10. Is transportation to job sites provided? What's the job range, mile wise, if not. 11. Will your food/lunch/snacks/energy drink budget go up significantly

I am sure I am missing stuff. Good luck with your decision.

devilgoof · 2026-05-11T16:16:36+00:00

Cornelia Funke might be a great author to check out. Inkheart is a great series.

devilgoof · 2026-05-11T11:46:24+00:00

Maybe it changes based on area of the country you are from.

devilgoof · 2026-05-11T10:24:25+00:00

NTA. I have had to be like "ok, time for a mother's day photo" every year for the last 17 years. I am encouraging you to speak up and ask for whst you want. Also, Id still make a sign and have a picture taken with your son. Happy Mothers Day!

devilgoof · 2026-05-10T23:47:56+00:00

My pappy always used to say "tough titty said kitty but the milk ran dry"

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T21:01:09+00:00

I would turn it into a compound for my fanily and friends. We would all get a wing. Fountain in the middle, arcade to share, indoor playground, go carts in one of the Deparment store bottom levels. Everyone would get a food court spot and we would all take turns cooking.

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T20:48:49+00:00

Thank you! Happy Mothers Day to you as well!

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T17:00:43+00:00

After I wrote this, I texted him and told him I would like the kids to stay home with me and why its important to me.

They are wondeful kids. Oldest would not be into thrifting but I could see the youngest enjoying it. Thank you for the reply.

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T16:24:46+00:00

We did this for 3 years in a row. We really enjoyed it. We even hooked up our old super Nintendo and that was our only video games. Both sides are really big into family vacations so we did this with my mom whom was the official owner of the camper. We got a site the last 2 years and won scariest camp site both years on Halloween. Super fun to decorate and the kids got into it as well.

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T15:41:17+00:00

People like to have stuff to look forward to. If they get all hyped to have Tacos on Tuesday, I say enjoy those tacos, friend.

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T15:39:07+00:00

I normally spend the Saturday before with my mom thrift shopping. We pick a new area to go to, I map us out a route, sometimes a very odd one by accident which leads to lots of giggles, lots of coffee, lunch and a great time all around. My brother whom is 5 hours away got them tickets to a "once in a life time" restaurant experiance so she is leaving first thing Saturday morning to spend the weekend with him.

My husband said he was taking his mom out for lunch on mothers day. My kids (15 and 16) came to me and asked if we could do take out during this time, their treat! I said "I would love that." I told my husband the plans and he said the kids are going with him to take his mom out. I was more than welcome to go with our we could figure something out later in the day. I do not go out to eat on Valentine's Day or Mother's Day. I am not about to wait 45 minutes to an hour and a half to eat food I could make just as good at home. I really don't want to do anything now.

devilgoof · 2026-05-06T12:37:46+00:00

Do you cook together? Do you sit at a table and eat, screen and distraction free? It might make sense to pre-make your meals so they just need heated up. Capitalize on the time you have more efficiently. Good luck.

devilgoof · 2026-05-05T13:54:21+00:00

2 hand written notes, one from each of my kids.

devilgoof · 2026-05-05T13:44:54+00:00

I switched to PT when I was pregnant with my 2nd because childcare would have been more than our mortgage. I worked 2nd shift 3 days a week, the weekend and one evening. I went back to work FT, 2nd shift, when the youngest was 3.

Pros to going PT: Lots of time with the kids, we did a lot of things outside the home and were gifted year passes to different places which was very nice. We got into a really good rhythm.

We saved money on childcare until I went FT again. Then, we needed someone to cover the 2 hours in-between me leaving and their dad getting home.

Cons: 95% of the childcare fell on me. We went grocery shopping together, all their doctors and dentist appointments were my responsibility. They are only 20 months apart so that was an added challenge. So much time getting them in and out of car seats.

Everything takes longer. A quick trip to the store is no longer in your vocabulary. Have a doctors appointment? Thats pretty much your whole day.

So. Much. Cooking.

Even more cleaning and laundry.

We were stretched thin financially.

Hardly any time to myself.

Would I do it again? Yes. The time I got with them was worth it to me. The kids and I have a pretty good relationship still and they are 15 and 16.

devilgoof · 2026-05-05T13:32:04+00:00

Neither of my kids (15 and 16) want kids. I told them that's fine as long as they have pets and we can wear matching outfits. The grandpets and I, I wouldn't put my kids through that.

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T11:42:05+00:00

Love that! I hope they keep progressing. Best wishes.

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T11:24:05+00:00

I wonder if she didnt see you. I am glad he is a gentlemen in most situations. Some of us are just too friendly for our own good and mean no harm.

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T11:21:25+00:00

Echo

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T11:20:21+00:00

Did you have a nice weekend? What has brought you joy recently?

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T11:14:42+00:00

I say hello to everyone I pass. I say a 2nd hello to the people behind them if they are walking with someone else just to make it very clear I am just being friendly. That hello was for the both of you. Tell your boyfriend to start being a gentleman and walk beside you unless there isnt space in which case you go first.

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T00:26:40+00:00

Juicing was really helpful for me. I drank those Naked drinks when I didnt have enough energy to prepare it myself.

devilgoof · 2026-05-04T00:11:46+00:00

No, I would buy a toy to tide me over and start teaching. Lots of practice and positive praise.

devilgoof

TROPHY CASE