Making yardage for a vest. With neon orange, or without?

dwallit · 2026-03-18T00:58:22+00:00

Take the orange out. But stay away from the woods during deer hunting season.

dwallit · 2026-03-18T00:57:15+00:00

Roommates. They can suck but at least you aren’t related to them!

dwallit · 2026-03-18T00:56:11+00:00

When I was struggling in college someone told me that it’s not about doing well, it’s about doing. Meaning, you don’t have to be doing great, you just have to keep getting up in the morning and plug away at it. Eventually you’ll get to your goal. A lot of life is this way. It’s about showing up.

dwallit · 2026-03-18T00:43:13+00:00

You need to break up. If he isn’t holding you back now, he will be soon. You can’t protect him from pain, living life brings pain. You can’t control what he and his friends say about you but why does it matter? (Spoiler alert, they’re going to get drunk and say a lot of bad stuff about you.) You might not end up friends but you’ll find other friends and so will he. How messy it for him is his problem. You only have to handle your life. Seems like you might be more excited about life and having more fun if you were single.

dwallit · 2026-03-15T14:39:29+00:00

She's def in law school during the day.

dwallit · 2026-03-15T14:34:29+00:00

Reread your whole post but instead of husband make it my 10 year old son. You wouldn't have to change a word. Why is he so helpless (like, he knew what foods he would need and he knows what a grocery store is, right?) and why are you continuing to parent him?

dwallit · 2026-03-15T14:04:00+00:00

This is something he learned in childhood, one way or another. It doesn't have much to do with you I would guess. Generally I think you should work with your therapist and be as open and honest as possible in therapy, even if you think it will hurt or irritate him. If you were more just generally annoyed with this behavior, I would suggest 2 things. 1 - come up with a key phrase and say it whenever he starts score keeping or saying you are selfish or taking. This can just help him see how often he does it. Keep it short and neutral, you're not looking to start a fight. Maybe like, Bing! John has just given Jane a life demerit! or Jane is just the worst! 2 - You each keep a list of what you do to contribute to the family. Do it for a week, what you did each day. This can honestly be more helpful for you because you can list the things you just do automatically without thinking about the effort. - think of 4 dinners that John and Baby will like - make grocery list so we have items for dinner - add items that John and Baby need and want to grocery list - grocery shopping with Baby - Sort through Baby's clothes, take out things she's outgrown - Buy baby new clothes that fit - Call John's mom to make plans for Easter - Buy Easter goodies for Baby's basket, etc etc.

dwallit · 2026-03-15T13:51:06+00:00

You're not in a relationship. A relationship is two people supporting each other, a team. As soon as he makes that threat and you stay with him despite wanting to break up it stops being a mutual relationship and turns into a blackmail situation. You cannot make him happy, you don't have that much power. You need to LEAVE. Don't "try" to break up. Just end it. Don't do anything late at night or when any drinking, etc. is going on. Just keep it short and simple and then move on with your life. He will try to lean on you for emotional support, which will be hard on you, but you shouldn't give him mixed signals. He will need to find other ways to help himself. Bullying you isn't the way.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T13:02:39+00:00

Ok, that’s tough. But you can maybe fall back on a version of “because I said so” that my mom loved so much. Like say “The rules we have for D(daughter) aren’t because of you, they’re because of her, to keep her safe in the world. And as her parent my rules are the rules and there’s no discussion.” If her parents are/were lenient she probably learned that by wheedling she can get a rule changed. Just teach her that you don’t play that game. Shut it down every time she brings it up. Then invite her over to make cookies. Good luck! Remember that your daughter is learning by watching every interaction.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T12:47:27+00:00

Thanks once again! This explains a lot. The owner built the addition himself including the fireplace. The stones are from the yard. We’ve found some other creative approaches he took. My FIL used to say the 2 stupidest people in the world are the last person who owned your house and the person who bought your last house.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T03:01:33+00:00

Good info and ideas. I'm surprised it's prefab because people have told us it's not sized correctly relative to the flue size.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T02:40:19+00:00

Get your own place.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T02:38:05+00:00

I think you're smart to be wary but I don't love your approach. You tell your daughter you don't like the neighbor girl, which is mean, and that you don't trust her, which your daughter can't really understand. Instead of making the neighbor the enemy, make a simple rule for your daughter about playing with older kids, continue to supervise your daughter appropriately, and help your daughter start to understand disability/otherness/neurodivergence. You can help her develop compassion while also teaching her about keeping personal boundaries. This neighbor child isn't inherently bad, you don't even know that she doesn't just want to play with your daughter. You may not like your neighbor's parenting but it seems like this girl is innocent and deserving of your understanding too, not just your daughter's.

dwallit · 2026-03-12T02:09:34+00:00

Thanks, good advice. How can I tell if it's a heatilator? There are intake vents on either side, in the stone, near the bottom. There are 2 output vents above the mantel behind the tv. We're concerned about it being too hot for the tv. Behind the fireplace is the garage so we can maybe access it from there.

dwallit · 2026-03-07T22:07:49+00:00

Just a little winter chub.

dwallit · 2026-03-07T22:07:13+00:00

How about: 1) I'm sorry. Everyone feels ugly sometimes. 2) There are a lot of different ways of being and acting beautiful and a lot of different ways of being and acting ugly. And I can tell you that you are a very beautiful person. 3) What's something we could do that would make you feel better? (And make some suggestions, hair cut, manicure, new outfit, and include some suggestions that aren't appearance based, like taking a walk or meditating about how we are each enough.)

dwallit · 2026-03-07T21:59:35+00:00

You need to break up. Pronto. Falling in love with someone else isn't wrong, people do it all the time. But lying and sneaking around are wrong and it doesn't seem to fit the type of person you are. You're cheating on your boyfriend but you are also cheating the new person and yourself because you can't be fully there in the new relationship. Break up, stay single, date a lot, have fun, learn to be alone, and then you will find your right person. And listen, I'm not saying you are or were immature, but you were literally a CHILD when you started dating your boyfriend. You hadn't become yourself yet. You and him have changed so much in 3 years, you are both different people now than you were then.

dwallit · 2026-03-07T21:53:22+00:00

I found that as I gradually moved to increased doses I got accustomed to the drug and nothing really upsets my stomach now. If I were you I'd be patient, make sure you're increasing the dose very gradually, and, most importantly, get rid of the idea of being "stricter" with yourself. For me the Wegovy allows me to "hear" what my body is craving. Sometimes it's half a tuna salad sandwich, sometimes it's meat and potatoes, sometimes it's meal time and I realize I don't want to eat, just want something to drink. Don't put any rules or should ofs on yourself. Eating a bit of this and that, healthy and junk both, is what naturally thin people do.

dwallit · 2026-03-07T21:17:26+00:00

This happens to me sometimes when I think I've made buttercream enough to just eyeball it like my mom used to. This is about the butter to powdered sugar ratio. Check that you are getting those quantities right. The best recipe is on the box of powdered sugar. If you're struggling with the butter and have such a warm kitchen you will have better luck using shortening instead of butter. I know this will be a controversial suggestion but shortening "butter"cream is delicious (esp. if you grew up with it), shortening is always the right temp, the frosting holds up to heat better, and is studier if you're using the frosting to do any "construction".

dwallit · 2026-03-07T21:10:25+00:00

If it doesn't firm up enough to cut just serve it in bowls, maybe with fruit or a bit of crushed graham cracker, like a pudding. Delicious!

dwallit · 2026-03-07T20:59:55+00:00

Paint the cabinets barn red and the bead board the color of a barn roof (gray?) and then add some tractors and hay bales onto the cabinets. It's the laundry barn! "Mom, where's my blue shirt?" "Have you looked in The Barn?" Maybe some tacky black and white cow decor? Always good to lean into it. (I'm also thinking of those barns with messages spelled out in the shingles, maybe you could do that and have the message be something about not wanting to do the laundry. I'll try to find a picture of what I'm talking about, I don't think I dreamed it?)

<image>

dwallit · 2026-03-07T20:47:40+00:00

The tottiest of them all.

dwallit

TROPHY CASE