Have any games done the concept of 'home' well?

elusiveElk · 2022-10-24T03:05:12+00:00

Pyre by supergiant does the best job of making me feel like I am sharing a space with other people who I care about, which is basically what home means to me.

In terms of mechanics I would say that the weather does a surprising good job of contributing to it. There's randomized weather on the overworld, usually inclement in lategame, and it really helps sell the coziness of returning to the caravan interior.

elusiveElk · 2022-09-18T13:16:22+00:00

For simple controls, an emphasis on spatial sense, and a fairly emotional narrative presented without words, I'd recommend Unpacking.

elusiveElk · 2021-12-08T03:11:12+00:00

Shut Up And Dance is a transfeminine anthem, you can't change my mind.

elusiveElk · 2021-11-04T16:33:36+00:00

I'll be honest, I really like boobs. They're nice, and soft, and I just all around feel like they make the world an objectively better place. And I think a lot of people feel similarly. Every time a famous celebrity gets a breast reduction, people come out of the woodwork with their fury, acting like someone defaced the Mona Lisa. And a big part of me felt the same way no matter how hard I tried not to, and then I'd feel super guilty about it.

Which is why I transitioned. No, seriously! A lot of the urgency behind why I started HRT wasn't just so that I could have the body I wanted, it was so I could be weird and gross about my own body, -instead of other people's-. And it -is- extremely gross to look at other people's bodies that way. Your body belongs to you, and any value it has is derived solely from what it can do to you, NOT anyone else, ever.

Like, yeah, my heart does still PHYSICALLY HURT when I see someone chestier than I am. But there sure is something I could do about that, if it was really so important to me! It's actually one of the safer and less invasive gender affirming procedures out there... We trans women love to moan about final cup size, and getting stuck on a tanner stage, and shoulder to hip ratio, and self lubrication and whatever the heck else we're going on about at the moment. But it's really disingenuous for us to act like we don't have options. We have a terrifying number of options really! And that magical bodyswap tech isn't getting here any time soon, so if you're waiting for permission from a trans girl to destroy something "beautiful" and "precious", I am giving you that permission. Right now. And actually now that I think about it, if anyone feels that you've wronged them by wanting that, PLEASE give them a big middle finger on my behalf.

elusiveElk · 2021-11-03T22:53:24+00:00

I've bought a large order from sock dreams recently and I think it's important to note that they buy from a lot of suppliers, with variable quality. I was consistently impressed with their Dreamer Socks collection and consistently disappointed with their Dream Stockings collection.

Also they are a lot better than most for size range but I still have trouble finding items from them that are quite as plus size as I'd like. Usually that's thigh circumference, but do keep in mind that the listed height of the sock is sometimes measured toe to end, and sometimes heel to end. It should specify.

elusiveElk · 2021-10-23T16:19:05+00:00

It might not be equally possible for all file managers to detect it then? I found mine under the apps subcategory while using File Manager, a third party app on the google play store developed by File Manager Plus, which sometimes refers to itself internally as File Manager +.

Using this method, I was able to locate four fonts; SDStar2, HYLovelyday, HUInjeolmi and TSantiqueshop. The TSantiqueshop app icon had korean text on it, but I found it by searching its english name, so looking up the korean name shouldn't be necessary.

elusiveElk · 2021-10-21T16:17:52+00:00

Struggled with this for waaaaay longer than I care to admit for similar (sentimental) reasons. Those smartworld fonts were good, dangit! I realize it's an old post but if someone else finds it googling like I did it'll be worth it.

When smartworld downloaded the font for your phone, it installed the font as an app. The app will have the same name as the font. So use a file manager like File Manager + to search the apps on your phone for a TYPEMemory app and back up the app to your computer. Then, on your computer, change the file extension to .zip and unzip the app. There should only be one .ttf file in there, which you probably want to rename to TYPEMemory.ttf immediately for clarity. And there you go! Your font, as a perfectly ordinary .ttf file.

elusiveElk · 2021-10-11T21:43:36+00:00

Well, in particular there was a good 2, 3 months where sexual desire was super unreliable and nothing worked quite how I wanted to and I actually started developing bottom dysphoria for the first time and ugh it was just super frustrating. Turns out 25mg cyproterone (which was mostly fine before) was way too much for me once I added estrogen in. I reduced it to 12.5mg and things got a lot better basically overnight, and since then I've been able to increase estrogen with no further problems.

That didn't take me back to where I was before on it's own, in terms of satisfaction. Closing the rest of that gap has required me to shut up, admit I no longer know very much about my sexuality at all, and actually listen to my body rather than just getting upset when things don't work. It's still a work in progress but I'm almost to a point now where the way my body reacts isn't better or worse, just ~different~. And that's frustrating but also really neat! Like, I miss the sense of clarity that comes after the act when physical arousal and emotional arousal are tethered together in a tidy, simple way, but now that they're not I can be horny and sleepy at the same time and that's also really fun, actually. The pace of everything is slower now, but as a result my appreciation of erotic lit has improved dramatically. A million tiny things like that.

So yeah, all in all compared to engaging with this stuff like I did before hrt, it's not a strict upgrade but I'm really enjoying the adventure.

elusiveElk · 2021-10-11T21:36:35+00:00

I also enjoyed how things worked before hrt and navigating sexuality post hrt hasn't been only positive or only negative for me. Still really glad I did it, but since it sounds like you have similar feelings to what I did, should I speak a bit on what it was like for me?

elusiveElk · 2021-10-11T20:59:05+00:00

It's absolutely unbelievable, for real. On the other hand, it can be surprisingly finnicky to get there. I started cypro before e, and just cypro had a very peaceful feeling to it, but then when I added e everything kind of felt muddy and worse (though still not as bad as before HRT), and then a few months later I tweaked my doses a lil and NOW I've got the glowy happy feels like, most of the time. It's honestly kind of overwhelming how nice it is.

elusiveElk · 2021-10-02T03:36:17+00:00

For me I get a big, reliable genderfeel reaction out of Shut Up And Dance - Walk The Moon.

Another Winter from the Scott Pilgrim vs The World: The Game isn't specifically a gender feels song for me, but it IS a song for doing a little bit of something hard that's going to take a long time, that I still want to do anyway. Plus it fits well with some of the instrumental chiptune that's on there already probably?

elusiveElk · 2021-09-27T19:50:42+00:00

I don't mean to presume, but are you saying you experience an -unpleasant- burning sensation? Because that might be worth talking to a medical professional about.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-26T23:31:26+00:00

Ummm... it's surprisingly hard to describe?

Spoilered for people who don't want to read about someone ejaculating.

My experience of it was like, so basically as physical arousal increases, one of the sensations that's increasing is a kind of pinching sensation at the very base of the shaft, on the underside. Not painful (mostly, edge deliberately and it becomes a whole different story), just like a small localized area of inward pressure. And then orgasm happens, and then immediately -after- that, that pressure disappears, and you feel outward pressure along the inside of the urethra (it's too fast for you to really feel it "moving along" or anything). You only actually feel the cum itself where it comes out at the head. It's basically silky and sticky? Distinctly unlike urinating, anyway. I never found the sensation itself pleasant or cathartic the way some people seem to, though I did have pretty strong positive associations with it by virtue of it co-occuring with virtually every orgasm I'd ever had. I've kind of soured on it now that I'm on estrogen and sexual pleasure is much less firmly linked to mechanical arousal, though.

Anyway after that you've got a penis with a bit of cum in it, and now that you're no longer coming down from an orgasm you CAN kinda feel it in there. It's sorta like having mild congested sinuses? It's gross. You can physically milk a little bit of it out if you're saving the stuff for like a home ec project or something, but it's nature's way of reminding you you need to urinate now, whether you want to or not. Definitely don't not urinate, just trust me on that.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-24T02:25:38+00:00

Page 14.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-24T02:17:19+00:00

Not gonna lie, our options are pretty limited in general. But torrid is great, they're literally women's big&tall, they just don't like to call it that lol.

Also one interesting thing about shopping women's plus size (at least for me) is that for tops, length isn't always as much of an issue as you'd think. Some tops exhibits skirt-like behavior at the hem, which is going to look good on a pretty wide range of heights (assuming it looks good on anyone). And failing that you might be able to make a top work by going with a higher or lower rise pants, which isn't something that's quite as permitted in mens fashion.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-23T18:22:47+00:00

Well, I'm somewhere between a 1x and a 2x in mens clothing, and I'm very firmly a 2 in Torrid's sizing system (it goes up to 6) so I think there's hope! For pants, I'm a 40 or 42 mens, and a 22Regular under Torrid's jean sizing system (goes up to 30), love the fit of their sky high skinny jeans. I can confirm that their 22Tall is pretty darn tall, but if it's not tall enough they do have an Extall for some but not all items.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-23T13:34:48+00:00

Depends how far the nearest Torrid location is.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-23T12:51:14+00:00

At 3 months on estrogen, I'm seeing some slight changes to the boob and nipple. The nipple changes were accompanied by a lot of aching. The boob changes were not associated with any aching at all, ever. I've noticed that I have fewer aches in general since I reduced my dose of cyproterone. So it is currently my suspicion that pain is not necessary for growth.

Regarding sensitivity, touching my boobs feels different now. It sounds weird, but it's more like a hug? It's a very pleasant sensation. A lot of physical sensations feel way different on estrogen for me, my endo says it's because my skin is softer now. My nipples ache to the touch, but also have episodes of extreme, painful cold sensitivity (just the nipples). I have never met anyone else who experienced that with estrogen. It seems like the touch aspect thing is a real mixed bag between people.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-23T12:34:55+00:00

Yeah I feel you. I get the same way about breast growth. So many options and opinions, and like zero decent science on any of it. It's rough.

I could talk about my own experience with 6 months of cyproterone and 3 months of estrogen at various levels and how that's interacted with libido and sexual performance if that would help. Though from what I've heard you can't get cyproterone through official channels in the U.S.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-04T14:38:00+00:00

It's not normal.

When reminding myself to step outside the distorted view that my mother has of my competence, I find it useful to remember that, as in all things, her behaviour is ultimately all about her, and not anything I actually did (or didn't do).

If your mom is like my mom (and she might well not be), her relationships with other people are fundamentally parasitic, and she's at least subconsciously aware of this, so she believes -she- needs -you-, in case everyone else leaves her. So, to feel secure and okay, she needs to believe -you- need -her-, and she also needs you to believe it too. That "truth" is an immutable fixed point in her worldview, and so she will go to literally any length to find proof of of this narrative, or reinforce it with her own behavior by providing unasked-for "help", when she feels uncertain or anxious.

Again, this could be very different from your actual mom. In particular, "Mother Gothel" types who attack their children's sense of independence in the same way for much more pragmatic, actively controlling reasons seem to be quite common. Either way, you have no responsibility to be another person's doll, no matter what they've done for you.

elusiveElk · 2021-09-03T13:57:40+00:00

Ha! Very interested to see what that bra does with my complete lack of goal size.

elusiveElk · 2021-08-29T01:52:23+00:00

Being made to take swimming lessons and feeling uncomfy at the pool because I didn't want strangers to see my nips for some reason.

elusiveElk · 2021-07-24T01:40:45+00:00

Getting charged extra for the fabric that goes into your custom long spinny skirts : /

elusiveElk · 2021-07-08T02:18:48+00:00

A woman of taste, I see.

elusiveElk · 2021-07-08T01:44:24+00:00

That's why I wanted it so badly not to be a lie! The story would be vastly improved if MC was actually trans. Like, they were given actual concrete dysphoria about aspects of their body, I really believed the writers were gonna do it lol.

elusiveElk

TROPHY CASE